bloodbound. (earinor & akira)

Being faced with Richards dessert, she shoved it back in front of him the moment he as much as dared to tilt it her way. Ruoxe wasn’t going to eat all of that, she had never finished any of her own plates either, not once tonight. Why would she? Her father expected some sort of decorum, the ability to restrain oneself and present themselves and thankfully for all the people present, his children loved playing that part if they were promised something in advance. Tonight, he’d promised her nothing, however, and therefore Ruoxe wasn’t interested in playing his game from start to finish; she was content with hanging around and sabotaging it, or at least seeing what it was she could do to make it a little more bearable for everyone, including herself. "That's yours. Also I'm not that much of a glutton, I have to watch my figure after all.", Ruo replied, sounding earnest no less. Where would she store all this food, especially if she barely moved anyhow? The ice floes of Silesse weren't a place for her, not like this, or in a way she really enjoyed - they were cold and unforgiving firstly, and secondly, there were barely any people her age that prowled about, much less girls and boys? Gosh, they sucked ... Richard, though? Not that much, she had to admit.

"Last time?" That had been forever ago, actually. Ruo crossed her arms in front of her chest and moved her head from side to side, trying to make up her mind. When was the last time Yin had really been here? She couldn't remember the intricate details, not that she needed to, but her voice fell flat, like a conspirational murmur was escaping her. "I think some time after you left? Yujin turned her away, it was something like this, but Yujin sat all the way on the other side of the table and wouldn't talk to her. He got annoyed when father tried to seat her next to him and eventually just stormed out. Didn't see him for two days after that, and Yin seemed annoyed. I think it was because she was here in the first place." And because of something more or less obvious - Richard. Yujin had been annoying after the blonde had left, for a good long while, somehow always clingy, always mumbling, but never crying. Ruo remmbered it like it was yesterday - he was pissed off, mad even, wore one specific expression on his face, sour and wronged, and now that she looked over to him for a moment, she saw bits and pieces of that same expression slowly creeping onto Yujins face, who tried to get Yin off of him to no avail.

Ruoxe seemed one of the few honest people around here. Richard had to notice more and more that Thria wasn't much easier and friendlier than Adrestia was. He expected more from Muhan, if he was completely honest and he wanted to trust Shuren, because he had to trust someone out here. This was a mess, but if Yujins sister was telling the truth, it meant that Yujin likely forgot Yin existed when Richard arrived back here. He didn't lie then and if Richard was any more of his old self, maybe he would have stopped being pissed and just claimed Yujin for himself right here and there, or at least told Shuren that he should let Yujin decide for himself what he wanted to do, rather than pawn him off. In reality Richard would have been pawned off as well, as nice and forward thinking his fathers had been, he doubted the court system in Adrestia would have allowed him to marry about anyone he wanted to, a commoner, a man, all these seemed impossible. The latter wasn't a problem here and yet, Yujin was used for his fathers gains and Richard had a problem with it.

In the end however, he was stuck here. He couldn't go back home, didn't feel safe someplace else and was incapable of living on his own. He used to be strong, he was a decent enough hunter, he didn't complain if things got harder, he was sure he could have lived in that hut Nayantai moved to with him by himself, but now? Now this seemed impossible. His body was weak, his mind probably even weaker and he needed all these people to protect him, to look after him and to welcome him. If so he could hardly take on Shuren head on, no matter what he thought about this all and he had no right to claim Yujin either way. Richard looked at Yujins sister and thanked her with another forced smile. As the dessert bowls were brought back to the kitchen, Richard saw his opportunity to get up and take all his courage to speak in front of everyone. If anything this situation gave him some form of false confidence, at least to be able to leave. He didn't want to take too much of the mens time, so he kept it short. "Thank you for the food and the invitation. I'm afraid I have to excuse myself, I feel a bit tired.", he let out, then headed for the door with as much dignity as he still had left.

Ruoxe should be the one to take it upon herself to leave as well, she figured, but before she could even get up to trail after Richard, another man by the table was forcing himself up - it was like Richards word, which was acknowledged with one fo Shurens non-descriptive nods - had caused a mass exodus to take place. Right then and there, Yujin also got up, finally tearing himself free from Yins grasp, this time forcefully - Ruo wanted to stay, sit and watch all of a sudden, knew that expression on the mans face for more than it was worth, was fairly aware just how insane it was to be on her brothers side in this, but she was, regardless of anything else. "I'll take my leave as well.", he announced, looking at the woman next to him and the crestfallen expression she wore, which drew their fathers ire upon him all the same. "No.", Shuren motioned. "It would be unsightly in front of your guest to simply leave her be, she came all the way here for you." Oh, how she wished she could stay and watch this, but she already knew what ought to come next of this. "Yujin, apologize.", Shuren demanded. "What for?", he scoffed, annoyance long baked into his tone. Then, the obvious came. "Ruo, why don't you go with Richard? And you, Xu, why don't you two take a quick breather?"

Xu and his fiancée got up as well, which left Ruo to stumble after Richard, whom she trailed after right then and there. Why him? She could have entertained herself by her lonesome, and not stayed with her brothers boytoy. "This reminds me of the good old times, those two fighting over everything. Hah. I hate it.", she sighed as she walked right in Richards path, just for a second, not to stop him but to trail around, nimble as she was and as disinterested as she seemed to be. For the most part she was silent until they reached Richards room, where she didn't even attempt to get in his way, guessing he would want some alone time - he was always around people, they swarmed him like he held some sort of answer to something and needed to hear their every beck and call. Regardless, still, she was bored herself, eager to hear whatever was going down in the dining hall now, but she knew better. "Need someone to talk your ear off or not?", Ruo offered, the tone of her voice airy and light, a jest in the making, not entirely interested in really sticking around. Or maybe she was, she just didn't want to admit it.

Yujin wanted to follow after Richard, which wasn't surprising, but Richard didn't intend to wait or get in the middle of this. While Shuren and Yujin started an argument, Richard was already by the door, practically fleeing out of the dining room, before he caught some of that ire that was undoubtedly also directed at him. For just existing. For just being here and not somewhere else. As it was when he arrived here the first time and as it was now, despite Nayantai calling Shuren and Muhan old friends. This wasn't friends taking in Richard from the goodness of their heart, this was an arrangement, whatever Dayan offered Shuren to take Richard off his hands. He believed his brother thought of him as well, heard Richard talk about Yujin, albeit very shortly, and thought he'd be better off there and maybe also away from Nayantai, which maybe held some truth. Dayan wasn't this selfish, but he also didn't know Shuren and if any deal was struck it was probably done by the red haired freak that now sat in Adrestia, continuing to poison Dayans mind.

Richard hurried along the icy corridor, only to be pulled out of his own head by Yujins sister who trailed after him. He didn't know what to say, he couldn't tell Yujin what to do or how to act and he could hardly give Shuren a piece of his mind, nor should he just tell his thoughts to Yujins sister with whom he barely spoke before. Arriving at his room he opened the door, only to be greeted by the two rascals, very much upset for being left behind. Once of them tried to storm out, but Richard caught it before it could cause even more issues in this dreadful castle. He looked at Ruoxe and shook his head. "Thanks but no, I think I'm just going to bed early.", he told her with another forced smile, then squeezed into his room and quickly closed the door. He felt bad for leaving Yujin to deal with his father alone, but he simply didn't have the strength for any of this. He let down the cat on the bed and then sat down himself, immediately being swarmed by both of them. At least these little things weren't potting anything sinister behind other peoples backs.

Ruoxe found amusement that she could stick into the bouquet she called her voice, like a yellow flower springing to life. Kittens? Here? She had caught that with but a glimpse, something she hated her eyes for at times, yet didn't utter a word in regards to them. "I get it, don't worry. Sleep well." With that, she trailed off, far away from this specific room and back to her own. Where else would she go? There was nothing of use out there, not tonight and not for her, and if anything, she was beat as well, quite tired, stressed even, and more than ready for bed before anyone else could convince her of something else. Lovely or not, all of her family was sporadically involved in catfights, some bigger than others, some smaller, but even if, it didn't matter much, it never had and never would, they always would mend the ridges between them, over and over again, whether they would like to or not. Shuren would make sure of that. Always had. Always would. Such were their lives, and while some would undoubtedly glad for it, Ruoxe saw it as annoying - nobody could say anything that they wanted, not really anyway, unless their father agreed with the sentiment.

It took forever for the conversation to die back down again, for the argument to be over, for him to lose it, or at least drive it into a stalemate - it didn't matter what he threw at his fathers head, it didn't matter who heard it, all he did was be reprimanded for it and as it went, he still was expected to be nice to Yin. None of that mattered. Why was it him that always, so very often, got the short end of the stick? With grit teeth he finally took off, sometime late during the night, away from the table with low whispers and sharp tongues, one that Muhan had been sent away from, and that was adjourned by both his own father and Yins, and Yujin? He was fed up, knowing he couldn't win, so he did the thing he could do - run. Had all of that helped any part of Richard? This had been a waste of both of their time. Grumbling, he made it back to Richards room, yet stood in front of the door like he had been frozen in place - should he even bother him? Yujin swallowed his pride, then knocked. "Richard?", he asked, gently, though no less nervous and annoyed. "This is my fault. I didn't know it would be like that."

Richard actually tried to sleep, just be over with the day. For a while he just cuddled with both the cats that still needed a name, he couldn't decide on any, couldn't even think of any. He couldn't even decide if he wanted the names to be Thrian or Adrestian. They didn't mind though and just cuddled with him, purring away. It was hard to sleep at the best of times and now? He felt like he needed to tell Yujin that he could not do this and as much as they maybe loved each other, he couldn't fight for him and especially couldn't fight his father. Aside from that, the feeling of being safe here all but vanished. If Shuren wanted Yujin to marry Yin and Richard to stay away from him, then he could have just said that, instead of planning an awkward evening for everyone, ending in a big dramatic fight in front of his guests that could have been very much avoided. Richard didn't want to be involved in any of this and he never got a chance to just back out of it, he would have done it after all.

Richard actually fell asleep, but was woken up by a knock at his door. He got up and already heard Yujins voice. Pulling his clothes around himself, he walked to the door, opening up, the two kitten still sleeping on the bed. "Yujin...", he mumbled, tried to look at him, but failed to do so. "It's your fathers fault, not yours." Did he talk Adrestian to him so his father wouldn't understand, even if he was lurking somewhere around here? It didn't matter much. "I guess you're still engaged and I don't blame you, you probably didn't remember, but either way... I can't be involved in this." Richard just tried to let it out as quickly as possible. He didn't want to let Yujin in and be convinced otherwise. He liked being around him, he liked sharing a bed with him, but not tonight or anytime soon. "I'm sorry Yujin, I don't have the energy for this... and I can't defy your father." If he could, he would simply return home, maybe he'd even write Dayan a letter, asking if there was a way for him to come back, or go somewhere else. It had been years since he last saw aunt Khojin, but maybe she had a place for him, though knowing her she'd kick someone as weak as Richard out immediately. Maybe that was what he needed anyway. "I'm sorry Yujin."

What had he expected anyhow? To crawl into Richards arms like a wounded animal, mewl a few times, as pathetic as he was, and then for everything to magically work out somewhat? This seemed like an idiotic idea, borderline stupid if he were honest and still, he went through with it, just like the idiot he had always been, always needed to be. Yujin couldn't know himself if he knew nobody else, wouldn't understand the meaning behind any and all words he could muster if he no longer was able to manage his own memory and yet, he seemed to expect something else. Anything else, really. When Richard opened the door, did he have any sort of expectations for him? No, that would be selfish, a bit too over the top, even for the likes of him, and yet, he could have used a hug, but not from him. In the end, all of this was his fault to begin with, for not remembering, for not wanting to do anything else but be there for someone he only knew the semblance of a shadow of. "It's mine as much as it is his. If ... I could've known, somehow, I wouldn't have kept it from you. I'm sorry." But that apology was as good as shreds of paper on the whispering winds of yesterday.

Wedging a foot between the door and the frame would only be insensitive, forcing his way in was like prying and Yujin could tell from the look he didn't get that, even if Richard saw it for what it was, he was disappointed in him. "I know." Thin, raspy strips of a voice escaped his throat, one he called his own, one that could have once woven blankets upon blankets of goodwill for Richard. Realistically, it was still able to do that, but practically, he couldn't. "It shouldn't be like this. I don't want this, I don't want her. Never did." All this to please a man that should have his best interest in mind, to appease a father that couldn't respect him for once in his life. Was Shuren capable of anything but sugarcoating the ugly truth he had woven into their fates himself? "I know. I'm sorry. I don't know if I can figure something out. But I don't want this. Least of all do I want to hurt you, or wedge you between two chairs. It's not fair. Not to you, or me.", Yujin made so very clear, like driving home a stake. It hurt, it always did. "I ... I'll figure something out. Definitely. I'm sorry. I- rest well, please?"

Richard quickly closed the door and ended the conversation on that note. He appreciated Yujin taking hi words at face value. He didn't need to beat himself up over it though and Richard wasn't mad at him, it was just that he needed to be allowed to stay here and he couldn't anger Shuren if he wanted to. Under different circumstances he wouldn't have cared, but like this? He didn't feel like he could do much. The next day Richard wrote a letter to Dayan, it took him almost the whole day trying to figure out what to say. In the end he simply gave him a small update, just that he was getting better and that he missed him. He also told him that he'd like to talk to him at some point, if at all possible, simply because he figured he couldn't just ask what this arrangement was and if it would cause Dayan too much trouble if Richard was in Adrestia over a letter. He also knew that an answer would take months to arrive. He still hadn't heard back after his first letter, but the ships from here to Myriad were few and took weeks for one direction alone.

Richard avoided Yujin, he actually avoided all of them. Someone made it so a servant delivered food to Richards door two times a day. When Richard needed a bath, he went late at night, when he was sure nobody else would be there. Shuren didn't check on him again lately and Richard was glad, because he wasn't sure if he would manage to remain calm around him. He also found himself frequent the library more often, now that Yujin wasn't here to help with his studies. One time he brought the cats, but they distracted him too much, clawing at things they probably shouldn't and also maybe it was a bit cold in there. Richard could only bear it for so long himself. Initially he just searched for easy materials to practice his reading with, but quickly some other books got his interest, books about ancestry and records about Thrian chiefs and kings. He didn't know Yujin had had an uncle and deciphering records about his grandfather proofed interesting too, but it also seemed like something Richard wasn't supposed to read in the first place.

With his trips to the library Richard got more confident and also frequented the rest of the castle a bit. His window went out to the cliffs and the sea, which he liked, the noise of the waves was soothing at times and watching them especially in stormy weather was something Richard enjoyed. If he was able to paint, maybe he would have attempted it, but his talents definetly didn't lie there. Still, sometimes he wanted a different view. He avoided watching Yujins training in the courtyard, but when he followed the icy hallways he ended up above the entrance to the castle and from there he could sea the small village around. The castle was smaller than the castle in Myriad, but it was about the same size as the estate in Fhaergus, the town however seemed even smaller. Most of the huts were made out of wood, not ice or stone and often times there were gaps between them. Not many people spent their days outside if they weren't hunting or fishing, so there wasn't much going on, but it still looked lifely with the smoke rising to the sky out of most chimneys. Richard sometimes just sat down and watched what was going on a bit, for as long as he wasn't freezing too much, but even that had gotten better.

Yujin spent his day idling by - he trained with Muhan, frustrated beyond belief, and it showed. While his training picked up and he was getting better at what he was doing, it was downright obvious he was malicious about it, or at the very least more than just angry. Whenever someone paid close attention, he played nice enough, but when it was just his father, he was focused on taking the old man out, one way or the other, and if he'd let him at any point, Yujin would likely beat him to a pulp with his wooden sword, so much so that his old man would start seeing stars. Was it mean to see any fault within Muhan? Yujin thought it wasn't, made him responsible just like Shuren, whom he'd not spoken a word to since the incident, and whom he ignored like it was his right. Whenever he trailed off, even just in his thoughts, his father found an opening - of course he did - and made it apparent just how much he still lacked. That, too, sucked, but instead of whining and giving up, Yujin got back up and tried to beat his father all over again. The one time he succeeded, he held the wooden hilt of his sword tight, clutched it until his fingers turned red and the halfmoons in his nailbed were stark white in contrast. His entire body was tense as he was considering raising his weapon and finally do what he wanted to, but he couldn't bring himself to. Out of frustration, he'd tossed it away and stormed off, away from the castle.

His legs never brought him far, they always ended in the den - which he could hardly stand - or somewhere by the cliffside, where that stupid hut stood that Richard and his dad used to live in. Yujin didn't feel like he deserved going inside, he couldn't bring himself to, and even when he tried to be considerate, not only of his own but everyone elses feelings, he had a hunch that all he did was make it worse for everyone involved. This, too, was so very stupid and no matter how he went about it, there was nothing to be found among the various ideas that went through his head. Talking to Richard didn't seem to be the move he wanted to undertake, much less was it an appropriate one, but he still owed him more than just silence and fear, neither of which seemed welcoming emotions. Was he mad at himself or his fathers? Yujin couldn't even say, hell, he couldn't even figure it out - no matter what he did, there was nothing to be gained from actually spending his time with his head in his hands or ignoring the truth, but what else was there to do? Hope for the best and wait for the tides to change in his favor, demand the current his father stirred up spit him back out? What laughable demands those were.

Regardless of the fact that something was stirring within Yujin, another storm was brewing elsewhere. Xu had called upon Quan, as was his right, and demanded he meet him then and there, by the back entrance of the castle, like always. Wasn't it stupid? Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the scoundrel showed up. "Took you long enough.", Xu huffed, an air of annoyance following his every word. "Not like I had much of a choice." "That is your own fault and you know it." What a way to accuse the man he once loved so very dearly. In the end, they were all means to an end for him, and right now, he was within his right to do so. "Look, I don't want to keep this goddamn secret any longer.", Quan soon hissed, after looking around and making sure they were alone. "What secret?" "You know damn well what I'm talking about!" Their entire fight seemed so very one-sided right now, up until the point where Quan grabbed Xu's collar and looked at him with disdain in those very eyes that could not harm a fly initially, that seemed so idiotic and innocent, it sounded insane to believe they were capable of anything else. "I am not going to keep lying for you to cover your ass! Yujin is my friend!", he hissed, finding Xu's much warmer, gentler hand on his wrist, wrenching him away with ease. A smile that reached up to Xu's eyes, who had closed them to hide whatever glint it was they possessed. "Now he is? What happened to me, to your best friend Xu, hm?" "You're insane if you think I ever cared about you!" Another hushed whisper, then the sound of a slap echoed - Xu had backhanded Quan, right then and there. "Are you jealous I'm marrying someone that isn't you? Is this what this is about? Know your place. You're nothing in the grand scheme of things. Quan, how stupid are you? Can't you see I just used you? Now it's too late for regrets." Xu seemed oddly amused as he laughed the other man in the face, then motioned towards the cliffs. "I suggest you go home, to what little dignity you have left, and abandon your little plan for revenge. Nobody will believe you, you don't have proof - to my father, this is all on you, anyhow. Now get out of my sight, unless you wish to meet your end - it's not like anyone will miss you, or even remember you." "You're insane!" "No, I just know how to make sure the throne is mine and mine alone. Would be a shame to tell Yujin that his favorite, useless little friend got in my way, huh? Not like he'll remember you, anyway. I'll make sure of that."

Richard wasn't doing anything in particular on this day either, he just strolled around a bit, mainly to get his body back into shape, at least a little bit. Not in fighting shape, but he wanted to be able to walk and maybe even run around if he wanted to, for whatever reason. These days he felt more trapped in this stupid castle than ever and waiting for Dayan to answer his letter, or maybe even Nayantai to answer his first he wrote weeks ago, was a fools errand. They would answer, surely, but he was so far away from his family, it would take forever to get a letter delivered back to him. He made this castle his own prison however, the doors were open for him, he could leave whenever he wanted, it was his mind that kept him from it. As he walked along the outer wall, he heard yelling though. He had gotten better in understanding the Sillessian dialect, but he didn't understand it perfectly. He knew the voices though, Xu and Quan and if not for that, at least one of them was mentioned by name, alongside Yujin.

Richard was quick to press his back against the nearby wall, he didn't need to look down, he just felt like listening. Usually he minded his own business, but this? He always knew Quan knew more than he wanted to admit and the half hazard answer he had gotten from him once was if anything only a half truth and he knew it, but Richard left for his own selfish reasons and left this situation behind. There wasn't much new information to be gleaned, but confirmation. Xu was involved, Quan knew exactly what was going on and Yujins older brother also tended to be a little bit insane as it seemed. The fight ebbed down, Richard heard the snow crunch other presumably Xu's feet as he walked off and Richard stayed where he was for a few more moments. Then, against his own better judgement and if something had stung him, he hurried downstairs towards the gates, the front gate to be exact, because he didn't want to secretly leave only for people to speculate, nor did he want to run into Xu. He earned some looks by the guards, but told them politely, that he simply wanted to take a walk, maybe even all the way to the harbor to see if an Adrestian ship with news of his family would arrive today. That was probably much more information than they needed to hear, but either way, he walked out calmly and collected, but turned left fairly quickly. Quickening his pace he hoped he'd still catch Quan. How was it that he even made it outside in the first place after months of being too scared? No, he forbade himself to even think about it, there was no time to be scared now, instead he caught a glimpse of someone leaving towards town. Richard hurried after, glad to be out of earshot of the castle, after all he just learned how easy it was to eavesdrop on somebody else. Around the corner he grabbed Quans shoulder to get his attention. He was already somewhat out of breath from running down the stairs and hurrying after Quan and he definitely lacked the strength he once possessed, but he tried his earnest to seem like the man Quan used to know. "I heard you talk to Yujins brother just now."

Quan just about had had it with Xu and his stupidity. Not once had this man be willing to ever admit to his own shortcomings, to the fact he was fucked up and had much bigger issues than he was willing to admit, oh no. While Yujin often claimed that his father, Shuren, was the insane one, which Quan didn't have the guts to deny, given the side of him he'd seen, Xu was in a league of his own, blessed with a temper so bad, he was capable of making his father the laughingstock of entire courts if they knew. However, it wasn't like him to entrench himself into the misgivings of other people and thus, he left, hardened snow crunching underfoot as Xu left him be, his cheek red and stinging from the slap he had earned himself. This man wanted to be king, yet couldn't make himself appealing enough to even the people that considered him to be a friend not too long ago. When had Xu lost his marbles? A long time before Quan, that was for sure, but Quan himself at least had the dignity to want to own up to his misgivings and insanities in the long run, now that he felt inclined to do so at the very least. Xu, on the other hand, seemed capable of taking it all to the grave with him, aware that nothing ever lasted forever, yet, he would force eternity about himself, by any means necessary.

His entire mood was influenced by the decisions of others, always had been, always would be - Quan wanted nothing more than to forget himself, to drink and smoke until all that was left of the incident was a nagging feeling at the back of his mind, which would ebb away at the end of time when nobody questioned anything any longer. What Quan didn't expect, encompassed so deep in his thoughts, was the visit of someone that had listened, ears and eyes sharper than a blade, and his own senses dulled by anger and disdain - he almost jumped out of his skin. "You scared me!", he grumbled as he looked upon Richard, whom he hardly recognized, not for the same reasons as Yujin, however. He raised and eyebrow as he stopped in his tracks to look at him - he was neither properly dressed, nor looking the best, but what he said next made his hair stand on end in an uncomfortable way. "I haven't seen you in forever.", Quan remarked, scrutinizing Richards looks for all they were worth. Should he give him his coat? No, that guy clearly lived at the castle, Yujin had enough of a wardrobe to gift him something appropriate. "Yes, and? What's it to you?"

Quan was visibly startled as he turned around, maybe because he didn't hear Richard approach him, or maybe because he thought Xu had come back for more than just a slap, a red mark still prominent witness on his cheek. Quan though quickly was over it, mustering Richard who was well aware that he looked much different. He didn't shrink, but he probably looked smaller and the clothes that fir Yujin well and should have fit Richard well as well, were too big now that he still tried to regain his weight. His hair was longer too now, but that wasn't strange around here. "I've been home for a while.", he simply answered Quan with a strong a voice as he could muster. No games, this man would again lie, or get Richard off of his case somehow if he showed him any weakness. This was still true about every place in the world, even in the far away Silesse, showing weakness was a no go among Thrians as well as Adrestians, especially if one wanted something.

"And? I want to know the truth. If you're too scared to tell it to Yujin yourself, I'll do it instead. I'm not afraid of Xu." That was a lie. Whatever happened to Yujin was his doing and while Richard would have been confident enough to take him on around a year ago, now he wasn't a match for anybody, much less the heir of Silesse. Still, Richard always had this incident nagging at the back of his mind and even though they said they'd give it a rest once they actually went to that place where Yujin was found, he never fully forgot about it. Even coming back he asked questions again, less about what happened and more about Shuren and the fact that he made Yujin forget with this stuff he made him take. He already placed Quan at the scene of the crime, but when he confronted him, he just said something about a storm and losing Yujin and then apparently some form of accident happened. Now it was all but confirmed that Xu had his fingers in this as well. For what? The throne? Why would someone go this far to hurt and betray their own brother? Richard couldn't comprehend it, for he would have never done anything like it to Dayan and likewise Dayan would have never hurt Richard, just to get the throne over him.

A bleating lamb had presented itself in front of him like some sort of worthy sacrifice and Quan wasn't all too happy about it - if Yujin himself had overheard the two talking, maybe he'd have felt more inclined to fess up, instead, he was presented with a shambling ghost of what was once a man and Quan felt pity for him, a short burst that lasted a second and then burnt out, like the flame in his hearth at home likely had by now. "Home?", he reiterated, taken aback. This place was no home for the likes of Richard, not for a man from Adrestia, who only bore half the world on his sleeve. What would some idiot like him know about home? Quan snorted, not in amusement but pity, the plate he was offering filled with misgivings of more than just one kind. "You'd call this wretched place your home? You're just as lost as everyone in that frigid block of insanity.", the wolf remarked, long having lost both bark and bite, as was to be expected. There was no way out of this conversation, so instead, he eyed the world around him and then, slowly but surely, resumed walking as if he was still afraid of something.

"And lose my head to Xu? No thanks.", he grumbled, but it wasn't like he wasn't giving Richard a shot at trailing after him, following his footsteps in the snow that kept going, further and further, until the next snowfall would inevitably bury them, like it always did. Secrets in Silesse were wellkept, hardly shared with anyone and the snow was the same. It buried that which none needed to know within itself, making sure that no traces remained for anyone to follow. Thus was the principle of nature, the identity of Silesse and Quan, among others, its prisoner. "Even the snow has eyes, as does the sky have ears.", Quan told Richard, motioning someplace with his face. "You're insane for even listening in. If he finds out, he's going to have your head, and if not that, you're going to become one with the frigid floes - and I don't mean Shuren." Quan continued walking, at a slower pace, but onward nonetheless - it seemed like he was going home, to where his hut was, and nobody would stop him from going there. "You're not too cold, are you?"

Richard rolled his eyes, maybe it was simply that Yujin was too nice to him, never questioning and taking all of his whims, unlike someone like Quan. "I'm speaking of Adrestia.", he explained to him. He hadn't been here for quite some time and then he still didn't leave the icy palace, that's true, but he'd not call it his home, especially not now. Quan didn't know what happened there or why he was back, or why he left in the first place, it was none of his business, maybe as much as whatever happened between Yujin and Xu wasn't Richards to begin with, but he didn't care. He wasn't even sure if he was doing this for Yujin, if he ever did, or if he only wanted something to occupy himself and because he hated secrets and needed to know himself. Maybe Yujin was better off not knowing at all, but at least Quan seemed to want to tell him. What a friend, keeping a secret for this long. If anything he could have blurted it out when they both were drunk and even if Yujin remembered the next day, he was too soft to do anything and probably would have forgotten it again on purpose.

"You can go wherever you please. You don't have to stick around here in Silesse, around this family.", Richard pointed out, his heart was loudly beating in his chest, but he tried to seem calm at least and fix his posture. He understood what Quan told him though, he might be convinced to talk, it seemed like he wanted to tell someone for the longest time, but not out here and this close to the castle. "I didn't on purpose. It was hard not to hear you two...", Richard mumbled. He didn't follow Xu around, nor did he seek out Quan, he simply walked past them on accident. "I've dealt with worse and I have nothing to lose. Besides, if something were to happen to me, Silesse would have much bigger troubles." Big words from someone trailing after Quan with trembling legs. He didn't know how far away he lived, but Richard wasn't used to the pace he set, but he, again, had had worse and he knew how to bite back any complaints and force his body to simply obey him. Wasn't that what he did the first time he came here? "I'm fine." Richard hated his weak body. He complained before, when he was simply cold and recovering from almost bleeding to death multiple times, but he was a million times stronger than he was now. It seemed Yujin was the only reason for him to even try and be strong. Who or what else for would he fight even? He had nothing to his name anymore and he couldn't even decide where he'd live. He was pathetic and Quan likely already picked up on it. Maybe he'd just finish Xus job for him, get back into his good graces, but what of it? Death was nothing to fear, not after what he'd been through. He'd rather die then go through that again.

Quan chuckled, of course he meant that cursed land past the border, something that he clung to and hopefully would disappear back to if he were given the chance, and yet, instead, it sounded like he was here to stay for whatever reason that may be. This was stupid, wasn't it? To hate on someone that was only here because he had to be, while Quan was hardly that different. Was he? Richard was about the closest he had been to someone outside of Kun or Jia in a while, even if Yujin showed up he seemed awkward, almost distant, with his head in the clouds and his voice tinged with regret. What did it matter? Why would it? There was nowhere to go, no place to be, no - everywhere had eyes and ears, as much as he regretted to admit to it, they all knew who he was, what he did and why they cast scrutiny upon his every action. "Of course you would.", he pointed out, moving along the snow that shuffled beneath him like a deck of cards, trying to present him with a new hand, one he hadn't seen before, only for the same cards to be regurgitated back at him, to realize nothing would ever change.

"I can't. I don't have anywhere else. Besides, he'd find me and drag me back. Do you really think he'd just let me off the hook?" Xu would rule these lands with an iron fist if this continued, he'd make it so very obvious to them all that there was nowhere to go to escape him - he held no power, and the Queen of Thria seemed to turn a blind eye to Silesse, willingly. In the end, all of it was for naught, it didn't matter, it ever had, it shouldn't have. "Fine, fair. You still listened in. That's what I mean with the sky has ears.", Quan complained, indirectly, as he pointed the way, around the settlement, all the way to the back, further and further ahead, glancing back every once in a while to watch Richard struggle. Had they kept him like a pet in a cage made of ice? What the hell had happened to him? "Oh? And how long until someone figures that out?", he snorted. "By then, all the people that have done something could be long gone, and no one will ever find even a trail of them. Who knows if they'd not pick the easy way out, too. You're too optimistic." They arrived at Quans hut after an eternity, where he shoved Richard in before him, then locked the door behind them. Quan brushed the light snow he'd stirred up off of himself. "I have a hearth. Go sit there.", he told Richard, pointing in the direction as he traced off to the kitchen to set up some kettle. "You look like shit, and you still want to probe me on what I talked about with Xu? What if I kill you, huh?"

Richard felt like he was his father, needing breaks whenever they went somewhere, not joining when it got a bit more taxing. He had inherited his own health problems, but nothing as bad and still, now, he hardly was able to keep up with Quan who glanced back over his shoulder every once in a while. He had even less context than Yujin and was probably also less aware of anything that was going on in Adrestia, in his view Richard was here, loud and out to fight and the next moment he was whatever he was now. "You can fight, you can hunt, you know how to survive. You can live about anywhere you'd like, make new friends.", Richard disagreed. Quan was in a much more privileged position. Not only was he all of the above, he also had no ties he needed to upkeep, no family to worry about. "Shuren and Xu alike think they are much stronger than they are, only because half the populace can't even set foot in this place, but the truth is that their arms reach only so far. That is why Shuren tries so hard to keep Yujin in, he knows that if he got out, he wouldn't be able to get to him anymore." And the same was true for Xu as well. Quan only had to run far enough.

"Maybe you shouldn't have fought below a window then.", Richard told him, even if it wasn't a frequented one. Finally they steered for one of the huts, one more secluded one and Quan opened the door, shoving Richard in first. His eyes needed a moment to adjust from the bright snow to the dark interior of this place. Richard was told to sit by the hearth and he did, catching his breath for a moment, but trying to not make it too obvious. "It doesn't matter if Xu does it himself or not and even if it takes months for my brother to hear, he'd burn this place down and he doesn't care who's fault it was." Richard wasn't exactly sure how much love Dayan had left for Richard, but if anything it would be a matter of principle. He wouldn't just do nothing and if Adrestia knew of Richards existence, they wouldn't let it slide either. There were plenty of people still itching to go back to their old ways and Shuren knew that. The only flaw in his argument was probably that Quan didn't know who Richard really was, who his parents were. "Then I'd be dead.", Richard answered defiantly. "Whatever your choice do it quick."

As the kettle was brewing, water was heating, he leaned against the wall and tossed a glance back at Richard, tried to make it somewhat more appealing to himself that he was about to let this man in on his secrets, told himself that if he killed him now, maybe none of that would be relecant anyhow. What did it matter? Quan had given up the chance to govern himself a long, long time ago and someone like Richard wasn't a thorn in his side but Xu's, who so very desperately would like to rid himself of him, he was sure of it, whyever that was. "That's easier said than done. I guess I could, but you underestimate the reach they have. They will find me if they so please, whatever that may take, and if it takes them years, they will take those years. They've done worse.", was the following explanation, one that preciously few of them would likely ever be privy too. "Yujin and getting out?" A dry laugh followed the ridiculous thing that Richard had just proposed, to Quan, that soudned impossible, very much so. "His only escape is death at this point. Not that Shuren wants that, but Xu? He's had it out for him for ages, and he'd be happy if he were dead already. It's not like he hasn't failed that one before."

Richards commentary was less than helpful - Quan rolled his eyes, then took the kettle off the stove and poured them both some hot water. Not tea, just water - he gave Richard one of the cups. Afterward, he let himself fall onto his ass across of Richard, steadily holding his own cup. "Can't exactly fight anywhere else if that prick refuses to leave his cozy little castle.", he groaned, then looked Richard in the eyes, digging deeper with just a gaze - whatever it was Quan was trying to figure out, he seemed more than pleased with not having to ascertain anything himself. "Not like I care. They could come and burn it down now for all I care, and I don't care at all. Well, I'm just repeating myself. Do you want to go home or what? You look like Yujin keeps you as a pet bunny. That dude could feed you something, or at least get you clothes that don't make you look like you're drowning in them.", Quan barked, blowing the steam off of his drink before taking a gulp. What was it with this Richard guy anyway? Almost immediately, he made Quan cackle - not the good kind of laugh, but the demeaning one. Why laugh with him when he could laugh about him? "I couldn't even bring myself to kill Yujin, I sure as fuck can't kill someone I don't really give a fuck about. Don't worry. So, you want to hear the whole story or what? For what, exactly? It's none of your business, you know."

Richard rubbed his arms a bit, trying to warm up. Even though the castle was made of ice and he ventured to other rooms like the library or the hallway, it was even colder outside and he hadn't be prepared to venture out like that without a second thought. No, don't thin about it, if he did maybe he regretted his choices too much and he couldn't have that right now, he couldn't be terrified or worried about how he'd even go back. Why would he be scared if it wasn't death he was afraid of? There was no way Ares made it here, no chance in hell, even Fhaergus was too cold for those Olette fucks. "You overestimate their reach.", Richard told him, much as he probably overestimated Ares' reach. Even then, what would he do? Kill him? Yes, but he wasn't as patient as his father, or as smart and that rat next to Dayan at least seemed to not harm Richard for the sake of his brother. Richard bit his lip and kneaded his own fingers. He looked up for a short moment when Quan started laughing. "He's survived this long." And he'd likely be save in Adrestia. Asking his brother to be allowed back home seemed like the best option, but when it came to assassins or other people who had it out for Richard in turn, like a red haired devil probably did, then here was safer instead.

Richard was handed a cup of hot water. He didn't really care what it tasted of, he was just happy about the warmth. He warmed his fingers and inhaled some of the steam. "Then that's his problem and not mine. He didn't see me, so if you don't tell him, he won't know." Besides, what was Richards safety to Quan anyway? "Shut up about things you know nothing about.", Richard hissed and surprised himself doing that, still he was unable to hold eye contact for long. He didn't want to take him slandering Yujin though when he was the one that even got Richard out of bed and talking again. If he married Yin though, maybe that would keep him safe from Xu? It wasn't like he could go anywhere with Richard. Or maybe he should just stop pitying himself. Why did he want to hear the truth though? Maybe because he was nosy, but maybe there was a different reason. "To keep Yujin safe.", he answered. Whatever he did with all the information, it was better knowing than being in the dark about it all. "Don't act like you're not dying to finally tell someone."

Quan didn't know what to think of Richard. Admirable, that he was, but also insane, for coming here and leaving it at that. No wonder Xu thought of him as a thorn in his side, wanting to dispose of him the first chance he got, but even worse, he also seemed to be more than willing to actually go through with it, by any means necessary. To Quan, none of this would matter under any normal circumstances, but under these? He was slowly but surely losing his marbles. "Who even knows. Maybe I am. Maybe not.", he grumbled and took another gulp of his water, craving something that would let him drown out his sorrows instead. Would Yujin still care for him if he fessed up? Even if that idiot would always forgive him, he'd pay for finding out about this specific truth, not only with Quans life but his own. In some way, it was almost saddening to think about, and in another, it was simply natural selection, brought about by a man that had nothing to lose, only to win - Quan didn't want to be here, he wanted to leave, but this was as far as his legs could carry him from the castle. "He'd not if he weren't so stupid. You know I know a different Yujin, right? The old one, the one that Xu actually is jealous of." Someone that no longer existed, too. Quan and Xu had made sure of that.

One proposal later and Quan was laughing about it again - Richard was not only full of surprises, he seemed stupid as well, much more than he would let on in the first place. What an idiot that man was. "And if you fuck up and he finds out? What's your excuse then?", Quan chided him, desperately wanting to know just how Richard planned on going about all the loopholes that would be caused by this exchange. If only he had never heard the two of them, or simply not ran after him, they'd be alright and none of this would be happening, or driving them both up a wall. Silence wasn't bought, not between the two of them, not easily anyway. "And you know better than me? Out with it then, why are you back here in the first place? We both know you're taking advantage of Yujin - he can't remember, but when you left he was feeling horrible, and that's all your fault. You didn't say a fucking word!", Quan growled in turn. Both of them were surely more bark than bite, not that it mattered. For now, they remained about as civil as they could, for however long that would manage to be. Still, Richard was ridiculous, both with his demands and desires, some of which Quan could understand, most of which he didn't want to figure out. "Like you did the first time?" Another jab. "Maybe I am. But what's it to you? What will you gain from knowing?" There wasn't any way out of this, and he didn't need to turn this in some sort of fucked up horror story either. "Shuren wanted Yujin to have the throne, and then Quan raised the possibility of going by Silessian tradition - which is killing all your siblings for the throne - and Shuren forbade him. But because that fucker is still so scared he won't get the throne, that's promised to him, because he isn't Shurens son by blood, he tried taking Yujin out, recruited me to do it for him, in fact. But I couldn't do it and that's that."

Quan was all bark and no bite, he acted like he was the strongest of all of Yujins friends, but in reality he was scared of but a single man that didn't even manage to kill his brother himself. He hid away in this hut, was scared to even attempt to live his own life and complained about everything. Richard, right now, wasn't a whole lot better, but he had a much better excuse, scars to show for, plenty of them, more than Quan would ever sport. "The one you don't want to lie to anymore. The one not drugged by his father, I know. I simply don't understand how all of you can sit idly by and do nothing and the worst of you all is Muhan." He did nothing to protect his son and all their siblings hated each other. Looking at Richards own family this was ridiculous and even someone like Lucien had sympathy for his siblings. Maybe having the illusion of noble blood wasn't too bad, that meant it was something rare and there weren't many lives to spare for idiotic squabbles. Who'd want this block of ice anyway?

"Why do I need an excuse? If he found out, he'd be better off not touching me if he doesn't want to be king of nothing and if he killed me, then that's that. When I left Thria, I already made my peace, anything further than that is a bonus to be honest." Or maybe the opposite. His life wasn't very pleasant at the moment, but Quan actually got him to think, actually made him realize that he didn't need to be scared. He'd been already hell bent on dying when he left for his revenge, coming back was never part of the plan. Why was Quan trying to make this about Richard though? "At least I didn't attempt to kill him.", was all he answered. He didn't need to explain himself, he didn't need to tell him that there was a choice he had to make between a fleeting lover and his family. Maybe he'd been stupid, but he lost everything and he could have never fully committed to Yujin without closing this chapter of his life one way or the other. "You're just stalling, because you're scared and because you haven't fully made up your mind, but I'm also still here, you haven't told me to leave and you met with Xu today because you wanted to tell the truth to Yujin too. If Xu is as volatile as you say, this must have been enough for him to want your head already. Though, he knows you better, maybe you are just a coward." And even if Richard could barely look somebody in the eyes right now, he'd proven himself way more than Quan ever did. He lured his friend out into a storm and tried to kill him, probably from behind. Richard didn't even know how much more information there needed to be given. Nayantai hinted at the possibility that Xu wanted to make sure to get his throne, Quan admitted before that he was there, even though he claimed he lost Yujin in the storm and Yujins diary also suggested Xu and Quan did something at the very least. Maybe it was Quan having built a shrine for Yujin there, in memory of the person he killed, the person that was replaced by that loving idiot. "I'll figure that out once I know.", Richard answered only to finally get Quan to fess up. And in fact there wasn't much more information, but at least his suspicions were correct. Shuren, afraid for Yujins life, kept him docile and as long as that was the case, Xu didn't have a reason to hurt him. What a messed up family. Richard still had a few questions however. "Why'd you agree? Why didn't Xu do it himself? If he's as ruthless as you make him out to be, why did he need you for his dirty work?"