bloodbound. (earinor & akira)

Was it wrong to be out for so long? To Yujin, it had felt just right - like he needed to do many things at once, yet, he rather comforted Richard and spend time with him than indulge the world outside with his presence - it wasn't too odd in hindsight, and now that he was back, he wasn't even sure if he didn't want to take Richard with him one of these days, just to go watch the waves or go stargazing. Before he could do any more, he found the plant plucked from his very own hands, whisked away by Richard, who was doing much better than before - Yujins clothes also were a better fit, if not entirely, and he was sure that in due time, Richard would fill them out pretty well, much like Yujin himself that. There was no need for a seperate wardrobe, in theory, after all, they were almost the same size, height-wise at the very least, but there was still something that Yujin asked himself, unknowing of the entire situation. "Hm, can I ask you something? Did my clothes fit you well before?", the wolf wanted to know. After all, it didn't hurt, but if Richard didn't want to share his side of the story, it didn't matter much - Yujin didn't want to hurt him or remind him of something he'd rather forget, and yet, he felt inclined to, at the very least, ask.

He set himself down on the bed, not his side but Richards, and wanted to reach for his own bowl of food, only to find one of many pieces of paper in his hands. As if he'd only waited for something like this, he carefully cast aside the fabric samples, placing them elsewhere on the bed, and holding onto that piece of paper he was entrusted with, leaving the medicine to Richard - it hadn't changed much since he first arrived, and neither of them had figured out what the blue stuff was for, but as long as it did what it was supposed to, Richard was most likely inclined to take it - and Shuren made sure to perform regular check-ups and adjust the dosage of Richards medication anyway. As for Yujin, his own hadn't found its way on his nightstand or Richards, for that matter, and now that he thought about it, it looked vastly different - but that wasn't what he was supposed to figure out for now. Instead, his eyes wound up glued to the piece of paper and he read what Richard had written down for him, not aloud this time - he wasn't sure if he should. The ink splotches were to be expected, as well as somewhat messy handwriting, given the fact that Richard probably wrote all of it while sitting in his bed, but Yujin could read it just fine. "So ... you wrote everything down that happened to you, from the moment you decided to leave to ... coming back? Is it because it's easier to tell me that way?", the wolf asked, grabbing Richards hand in turn - maybe he wanted to give comfort, or to be comforted, Yujin didn't know, but this felt needed.

Explaining things could be hard, especially if one didn't know where to start and it only grew worse if one accounted for the countless amount of things that could have happened and that - if they were talking away without reason or cause - would only be swept under the rug. Emotions played a big role, too, and Yujin knew that, because there was nothing that didn't resonate with oneself, especially when they spoke of it or wrote it down. Yujin knew that well enough, as well as he knew that no matter what it was that he attempted, he often lacked a sensical reason to just forget. His eyes poured over the first letter he received and tried taking in what Richard was trying to tell him, or much rather himself, and Yujin listened, squeezing his hand for some sort of long sought comfort. "I have lots of empty books.", he suddenly admitted, almost embarrassed about not thinking about any of it sooner - that was something that came with being forgetful and having too many options at ones fingertips. He didn't even consider that Richard would like one. "I could have given you one, so you'd have be able to keep them organized.", he elaborated on his own thought process.

Richard was an odd one, a curious one at that and Yujin was the one that indulged him and his desires, his wants and needs, and didn't ask for much in return. His memories would come back eventually, at least he hoped, and the two of them figured out a few things, together at that. But in the end, Richard knew and kept those memories to himself, partially; and Yujin didn't dare ask why, but he also hadn't had any time to consult his own books, the key to all of his problems, and maybe, he'd go looking for them. "Is it really alright if I read this?" Now, he wanted reassurance, but he didn't want to pry Richard open like a book - he'd take whatever the blonde felt comfortable sharing, and it only followed that whatever or not it was just bits and pieces about things that happened or not, he'd read all of them. "It's fine. One step at a time is always good, and you can take as much time as you want - it's part of the process.", he assured the blonde, runing his thumb over parts of Richards hand, softly stroking it, as if the blonde was the one that needed comfort. With this, maybe he'd be able to understand him better - and Richard would be able to get all of this out of his system some way. Yujin smiled. "It's a pretty smart idea, actually! Would you, uhm, want to read some of mine as well? Given I can find them ... but I know I have them!"

There was so much - Richard wrote down so much, Yujin didn't know where it started or ended, he only knew that all his fellow, presumably, wolf shared with him as nothing more than the story that he'd endure up until now, his life that was in shambles at this point and what led him to come here in the first place. Silesse wasn't a nice place for many people, and while Yujin lived here and genuinely enjoyed his life here, he also was fairly aware of the people that didn't think that way - that claimed that this place was cursed, haunted by people of ages past, and Yujin was just one more soul without a purpose, without a place to go, hanging around someplace he didn't belong to, much like Richard, much like just about anyone else that called themselves silessian. But this wasn't about him, or the fact that Richard was still moving, still scribbling away to guide the wolf through all he was willing to share, with both himself and Yujin at that, and he got up, moving most of what made up their bed away from it, all the way onto the floor, over there, by the fireplace, that suddenly seemed to be so far away, yet, was home to nurturing flames that every living being - especially that plant - could use some of.

Yujin let his hand be grabbed and held onto the paper he was holding, studying every sentence just a bit too often, reading every last bit and savoring it for a second, as if it would help him understand the many things that had transpired - that even a version of himself with perfect memory wouldn't recall. "What are you ...? Are you cold?", he questioned. No books for Richard it was, none of his very own at least, but that of Yujin were fine - he'd go get them later, for now, he sank into the depths of the nest that Richard had built and Yujin wondered if it would have felt more comfortable someplace that wasn't made entirely of ice, and even then, as his own hand was let go of, he found his food in it, and more papers in the other hand of his. If anything, this was bound to be a long night, and Yujin wanted nothing more than for both of them to be comfortable, even if that meant they had to compromise their bed for the floor; it didn't matter much, the ice in Silesse never melted and the fact that this castle still stood, even with a fire burning in an icy fireplace, was proof enough. Still, it didn't mean he could be silly while his eyes wandered over the next page - he dipped his spoon into his own broth, probably much thicker than the one Richard was offered - and offered him up a spoon with a dumpling on it. "Want one?" His noodles weren't bad, most likely anyway, but it was still sad to see just how bland the food was - and Yujin had enough to share. What harm could one dumpling do anyway, especially after he'd sneaked Richard a bite of his own food time and time again? "It's not spicy, I promise.", he clarified, before he realized something. "Wait, you don't like spicy food? Am I remembering that right?"

The wolfs eyes followed the things that unfolded on the paper before him, read the words carefully as Richard formed them and tried to make sense of them with his inner eye, as if he was trying to make the story play out again, over and over, until he'd come to the realization that no, none of this was worth forgetting in the first place. It was odd - it seemed like his memories were gone entirely, deleted completely, simply because there was nothing worth remembering, but whenever Richard tried to make him remember something, it often times came flooding back to him, like high waves that had been contained by a dam before, but were unleashed just now. It was odd to be precise, but right now, he could only stop in his tracks and wonder what was happening, how it was happening and how much time would pass until he'd figure something - anything - out for both of them. Happiness was something that would only continue to prosper if the two of them could find a common goal, and right now, it seemed to be one of two things: making Yujin remember and Richard feel better, almost as if they both were using one another for their own, very much selfish gains. Silence persisted for a while, and almost as if he was anticipating something like that, he touched his own nose - the one that Muhan had fixed with a quick grip, and that Shuren sometimes complained about. It wasn't noticeable right away, but ... Yujin grabbed one of Richards hands, leading it to the bridge of his nose and letting him touch the area, that obviously was somewhat crooked upon further inspection.

"So that's your doing?", he asked, giggling about it as if they were nothing more than playmates that had overstepped one too many boundaries for anyones comfort that night and he'd gotten his just desserts. He followed the things that Richard didn't dare spell out, appreciated the honesty of the man that he was supposed to understand better than he already did, but he couldn't shake off the feeling that there was something else, something much more important to remember than the details of a story that sounded like it had been a good, long while ago. Those reddish brown eyes, looking directly at his own, had a sense of familarity about them, and yet, Yujin failed even the simplest of task, it seemed. An embarrassed smile was all he could muster. "I just ... well, your family is in Adrestia, aren't they? Don't you miss them?", he asked, much more specific. Surely, Richard wouldn't be lonely with someone around, but maybe he was homesick, or merely missing those who gave him comfort - if they did. Not once did the words he spouted about his father seem like they carried hostility, and he much rather talked about bettering their relationship. "Also, I'm sorry. I didn't know you ... were here but didn't want to be. Would you ... want to go back home?" Yujin already felt bad upon spelling it out, like some part of him wanted to be the selfish one for now and keep Richard right where he was - but their relationship wasn't that, they probably had been friends, nothing else - and yet, that didn't explain some of his impulses, but maybe ... "If you do, would you take me with you this time?", his voice sounded shy and meek all of a sudden, maybe even a bit sad - the answer would be no again, he could already feel it, but ... had they even talked about this before?

Yujin was, if anything, not someone that was well equipped to deal with things that he normally wouldn't encounter - obviously, all of that included the fact that yes, while he liked Richard, wanted him to get better and up on his own two feet, he could hardly help him if he didn't know what was wrong with him in the first place. The only thing that he knew how to deal with was, frankly, a variety of mixed emotions that didn't run too deep - and right now, he had made the decision to help someone that, by all accounts, was not only unable to help himself, but also someone as deeply flawed as he could get. They both had made their own decisions, whatever they were caused by chance or really happened because they needed to, but Yujin, on one hand or the other, was not only none the wiser, he also knew fairly well that no matter what it was that he did, he was trying to appease Richard, one way or the other, and get his mind out of the gutter that it was stuck in for way too long. Happiness wasn't something either of them should be denied and yet, there wasn't anything they could do about the many things that they did - even if Yujin was the one that held onto the crying man in his arms, that pulled him in for a hug, and cuddled so much closer to him that it seemed impossible to ever get away from him again. Slowly but surely, his hand stroked over Richards back - it wasn't a weak touch this time, he already knew that Richard didn't hurt, at the very least physically. He'd be walking on eggshells if he said something wrong, and he'd make Richard more and more uncomfortable if the two of them persisted to talk about things that the other didn't quite understand, didn't quite catch. One way or the other, this conversation was a doomed one, and as Yujins hands grew somewhat jittery themselves, he only found himself strengthening his resolve.

Whatever it was that Richard had gone through, he wanted to be the one that helped him, even if it was just a temporary fix. "Richard.", he resounded, his voice still calm, his thoughts still where they should be. He listened, took his time, but it was fairly obvious that he'd been the one that had plunged the blonde into this hole that he was no desperately trying to claw his way out of yet again - almost as if, no matter what Yujin did, he'd undeniably remind Richard of a past that he didn't remember, couldn't recall because he wasn't there. "You fought an uphill battle and eventually lost, no?", he asked, and yes, he lacked context, but Richards initial task was clear - go back home, get revenge - his thoughts, coming to life on paper, had told Yujin that much and while there was nothing more than that, aside from the fact that Richard had left him alone, in the dark about it all, and that neither of them were who they used to be, it was fine. To Yujin, it didn't matter - even if Richard piled up a mountain of corpses at his feet. "You're here now.", Yujin told his fellow wolf, mustering a smile that Richard couldn't see, all the while he was trying to help him out of his very own man-made misery. "I'll keep you save, nothing's going to happen to you ever again.", he voiced, as if he was fairly certain that yes, Silesse was the safest country out here and yes, Yujins arms were the safest place on earth. "I'm sure he doesn't hate you ... I doubt he's capable of that." And yet, Yujin didn't recall who Richards father was, couldn't tell - he only had a name, and probably the same opinion as everyone else, but it didn't matter, it never had. "I'm not a good substitute, but I'll listen. You can let it all out. My opinion of you won't change." It never had, it never would and it never did. If anything, Yujin loved Richard - unconditionally, like he always would - even if he himself didn't realize that. No, instead he was holding Richard closer, brushing over his hair, slightly tugging on it whenever one of his fingers got stuck; he couldn't do much else but comfort him.