bloodbound. (earinor & akira)

    • There was more and more mumbling going on, argueing over who kissed whom and what felt better, but Yujin let those noises drown out, he couldn't understand and he never would, it felt as if there was no reason for him to question it more than once, much like there was no sense in trying to figure it out, whether for himself or anyone else present, it was fine. "I never said anything about wanting to be a judge", he answered Richard, but maybe he shouldn't be the one that took himself for as desirable as he hoped he was, because honestly? He really wasn't. Richard was allowed to kiss, fuck and love anyone he wanted, this was just him being the entitled and precocious brat that the blonde liked to pain him as, so this was great. Despite all the booze and the obvious fumes in the air, which felt quite thick actually, Yujin was still thinking a bit too clear and suddenly, he didn't even want to be wasted, he'd use the opportunity he'd been given to have the staff prepare something to drink for them and while they did, he'd take a breather outside and just try to not throw up, or ... throwing up was probably the better choice, now that he thought about it. Sure, maybe he shouldn't have consumed as much alcohol to begin with, but now it was way too late to regret anything.

      "Aww, is our little Kun getting embarrassed?", one of the wolves said, but Yujin failed to notice where it came from, instead, the crowd of people - friends and strangers alike - started to annoy him. Richard was having a good time, which actually was neat, but that was about it - he should stop and have a good time himself, get up and once he did, came back with the booze and relinquished it to the den of wild dogs, maybe he could get Jia and his girlfriend to actually work some magic on his mind, but who knew? He wasn't even in the mood for sex. "I'm not embarrassed!", Kun declared and there was a squabble that Quan also joined in on, all the while he found a hand extended towards him. Yujin didn't want to take it, but he did, grabbed it and let himself be pulled back onto his feet. Was there any need to keep holding it? No, but maybe Richard would get this thing in the wrong throat, just like the wolf himself had done, so he kept holding it for a bit, actually, until they were out of the room before he let go. "I need some fresh air", he announced, sighed even and then made his way towards one of the waiters that he could spot, whom he told what to prepare and where to bring it. Once that was done, well, he wanted to go outside and not back there. "You want to come with?", he suddenly asked, turning to Richard and stopping in his tracks. "If not, I'll manage."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • The discussion continued, but Richard didn't really care if Kun was embarrassed or not, or if Richard actually was a bad kisser, because wolves kissed each other differently. But not everyone kissed like Quan, right? Well when Yujin and Richard kissed there always had been a lot of tongue and saliva been involved too, so maybe they did? In any case, Yujin was the better kisser between those two at least and Kun? He seemed a little bit shy, but that was fine. In hindsight Richard already kissed three wolves now and one of them was taking it the wrong way as it seemed. Yujin eventually took Richards hand and let himself be pulled to his feet. For whatever reason he kept holding his hand and dragged the blonde into the hallway. He closed the door and got his hand back, while he looked at Yujin who was searching for a servant to annoy and tell them to bring some more alcohol to their room. Before he talked to one however, Yujin announced that he needed some fresh air. Well Richard felt slightly better after he ate something, but he still was wasted. The hallways was still spinning a little bit, but Yujin seemed to struggle with gravity and balance much more than the blonde did. Yujin actually turned around, his gaze unfocused and he asked Richard if he wanted to come. The blonde was... kind of worried about him?

      "I'll come.", he simply said and helped Yujin turn around again, to shove him along the hallway and when they reached the stairs, Richard was already extending his arms just in case Yujin was going to trip and fall down. Richard prepared to catch him just in case while he himself made his way up. They both managed without tripping and when they went outside, it was already dark. Of course it was cold and Richard took in a deep breath, but he kept standing by the door and waited for Yujin to decide what to do. Maybe just take some quick breathers and then go back? Richard was still able to stand up straight, he was still remembering his name and he wasn't sure if he liked that. With no one talking and laughing, no one to listen to, there were only his own thoughts and although they were scrambled by now, he still remembered why he was here in the first place. Other thoughts were mixing in there too, about Yujin who was in such a bad mood and the kiss he had with Jia. Also he wondered if Yujin was jealous of Quan and if not, if it bothered Richard. In the end he only agreed because Yujin was translating Quans flirting with a weird tone and the assumption Richard would turn him down, right? Why did he do that? In the end however it worked out, because the fight had been fun and the pain in his face was kind of nice.

    • Why was he an idiot? Chugging two bottles like that couldn't be healthy, and he'd even started a third that had been swept away from him by Richard and the other one, the one that he started, Jia had taken away from him - so three whole bottles in maybe, what even, an hour? It couldn't have been two, but then again, he was fucking wasted by now and the only way to get up and out was actually with some help, which wasn't exactly fun. Sure, he could come up with something, figure a thing or three out for either him or Richard, but no matter what, they now wobbled out of the den and he found himself hit by a wave of fresh air, cold to the touch, that made him feel nauseous. Yujin knew that he should have eaten something, or drank more water than just a glass, but gods, he didn't want to throw up, this was going to be embarrassing and once he did, while he could potentially fit some more alcohol in his system, he was sure it would kill him, one way or the other. Whatever, that didn't matter, they were having their own little party down there and that was alright, he'd figure something out for himself - Richard had figured something out for him, too, and the solution was beating the crap out of Quan.

      "Was it fun?", he blabbered, finally turning around to look at the blonde who seemingly still tried to keep in one piece, or at least keep him from falling flat on his stupid face. Sure, it had to be fun one way or the other, didn't it? But something irked him, which was probably why he came a bit too close for comfort to check it out, only to take his hands to Richards jaw and figure out was what wrong with it by actually feeling it up with one of his hands. This would look odd to anyone that passed them by and didn't know, but Yujin eventually pressed the palm of his two hands on the left side of Richards upper jaw and on the right side of his lower one and exerted pressure in one direction, until eventually, something made a sound - and it had popped back into place. "There, fixed it", Yujin said, letting go of the blonde and then leaning against the wooden exterior of the den, letting himself slide down onto the snow-filled floor to sit there. Standing felt awful, but he also didn't want Richard to catch him, hold him close or anything like that - he had clowned around for long enough. "I should have brought the pipe, at least that way I'd have something to fidget with", he suddenly complained, but instead, he dug his fingers into some snow. A snowball fight was out of question, but it did feel good and not as hot as the air in the booth.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • Richard made sure Yujin wasn't falling back in again and he made sure that they weren't in the way of anyone wanting to get out or in that hut, so he led Yujin a few meters away from the entrance and checked on him there. How much did he have? More than Richard probably, but he smoked less, actually he didn't smoke anything and Richard wondered why. Out here it was cold and the air was as dry as ever, but somehow it felt good on the blondes head, even though, as always, he didn't wear enough pieces of clothing to actually be saved from Silesses weather. Yujin asked something and Richard was kind of confused at first. "The fight?", he asked, thinking about it and nodded. "Yes, I guess. More fun than it would have been to sleep with him." Did Yujin ask himself how all of that even started? It kind of had been funny and Quan and Richard alike weren't even mad when throwing the first punch, or during the many more. They just struggled for a while and stopped when they noticed, they both had enough. Nobody had tried to kill the other and it was wrong to say no one even tried to hurt the other, but it kind of had been like that. The amount of pain had been just right for them. Did that make sense?

      Now however his face hurt, his side did too, but that wasn't Quans fault and his hand was still bloody and the skin on his knuckles tore apart. Making a fist hurt as well, the hand was swollen and he couldn't get his fingers to close completely, but all of that was fine, he wanted that. Suddenly Yujin moved closer and started touching his face. "That hurts...", Richard mumbled while Yujin seemingly searched for something, touching all the wrong places and eventually... "Ah!", Richard yelped and Yujin let go. "That hurt!", he complained and the pain kind of made him more sober? But this felt... better, didn't it? Richard touched his own jaw, opened and closed it a little and it didn't made a strange crackling sound whenever he did anymore. All the while Yujin leaned against the wooden wall of the den and sat on the floor. "You'll catch a cold.", Richard said, but he let Yujin be and just was placing himself next to him, though he kept standing. He also leaned against the wall, crossed his arms and watched over Yujin. "Are you feeling better?", he eventually asked. "What's up with you today anyway?"

    • "That's good to hear, you both look like you packed quite the punch", Yujin added, but he didn't sound like he was mad about it, in fact, this wasn't so bad - he didn't have a dislocated jaw and someone had fixed Quans stupid nose, so now the world was back in order and nothing was going to hurt for long enough. "What about the black eye?", he then wanted to know, he didn't want to focus on himself and he hadn't asked earlier, out of courtesy and because he was sober, but he had neither of those things anymore, so he just ran his mouth instead, as he should have from the beginning because otherwise, he'd probably go insane. What for? Jealousy was a disease, but he wasn't jealous of Richard and Quan fighting, if he wnated to get into a scuffle, he probably could do that any day he wanted, with anyone that even only looked at him the wrong way, but this was different. The crisp air helped, somehow, but it also made him realize how bad he felt to begin with, how much he had his body tank beforehand and what it all amounted to in the end. Truth be told, he was losing his marbles, wasn't he? Someone had to help him collect those eventually.

      "At least he didn't break it", Yujin answered, but he knew that it probably hurt, for more than a single reason - it wasn't too dislocated, but even that was better than anything. Now that he sat here, he wondered if Richard was up for a scuffle, if he wanted to get snow thrown at him, but Yujin didn't want to, all of this was going to get too hazy the moment he approached it the wrong way. "I know it hurts, but now its fine again, so that's better, right?", he wanted to know, peering up from where he sat because the snow felt blindingly bright and he wasn't having that. What had gotten into him? He was a disaster, but he still didn't want to talk about himself, he didn't want this to be about him to begin with. "I won't, but you will - want my mantle?" Before even waiting for an answer, he got out of it and offered it to Richard, holding it up to him - he'd say no and if he'd been smart, he would have worn something thrian, not those stupid adrestian clothes that made him stick out like the sore thumb he was anyway. "I feel like throwing up", Yujin confessed, but he didn't, he couldn't, he was going to feel like ass regardless. "I'm fine, no need to worry." This wasn't about him, Richard should have fun.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "I told him I'm the one that broke your nose. He wanted to know more about, so I guess I broke his nose too.", Richard explained. Both f them hit hard, but probably not as hard as they could have, not like what... two days ago? Fights like the one he had with Quan were probably the better idea, instead of picking a fight with multiple people and end up too hurt if no one was coming by. Though the pain in his side had helped him through yesterday somehow and now that he stood here he moved his hand there and pressed his fingers in his side. Yes, it still hurt and he stopped again. Yujin was curious about the black eye as it seemed and Richard looked at him, trying to figure out what he should tell him. "That wasn't Quan." Well Yujin knew that, he saw him before, everyone did and the blonde didn't even know the name of the wolf that gave him that. "I just got into a fight two days ago, when I was in town.", he explained, was that enough? What more was there to say? That guy had been a dick and Richard jumped at it, only to get a punch back. Nothing much about it. Why did he do that? Whatever...

      "It's fine either way...", Richard replied. Even if Quan had broken his jaw, it would have been fine, even though it also would have been a hassle. Richard wouldn't have been mad and they probably would have stopped at that point. It still hurt and tomorrow he'd probably have a big blue spot there. Nayantai would probably not ask, but he'd tell him that it was fine and he'd also probably tell him that the other guy was fine too. "It's... yeah. Thanks...", Richard mumbled still fumbling around there and opening and closing his mouth to check his jaws movement a little bit more. "No...", Richard answered to the question if he wanted Yujins mantle, but he got it anyway and now he stood there with it in hand and not sure what to do about it. He just held it, but didn't put it on. He was already cold, but that was fine, he always was out here. "Maybe you should throw up.", Richard answered, maybe Yujin would feel better afterwards. "I can get you a glass of water, if you want?", he offered. Should Yujin throw up, he probably wanted to get the taste out of his mouth afterwards. "You drank how many bottles?", Richard asked instead of taking Yujins answer at face value.

    • "So that's what that was about ... well, that's Quan for you", Yujin answered and shook his head. Quan was an idiot, but Richard and him did fit quite well together and maybe, just maybe, the brownhaired wolf was better suited for what Richard was looking for. A quick fuck or a quick fight, no feelings attached and then, when they wanted to meet again, they would, because it always had been and always would be like that, Yujin knew as much and while his grasp on reality was wanning, the more alcohol he'd taken in, the better it felt to have some weird reassurance that at least someone would like the blonde, someone that actually could satisfy the needs he had. "I know", he replied, because ... Richards eye was black and blue, if Quan had done this right about now, Richards skin would be a tad bit too sensitive and the ruptured vessels from blunt impact would have a hard time. "Ah, so that's where that is from ... well, alright, did you at least land a good punch too?" Pitying him, that wasn't something that the blonde liked, so Yujin didn't, but then again, did he sound a little bit too distant? Normally he'd be all over the blonde by now, but he ... he should stop caring, they weren't even friends, they'd never be. Richard would leave eventually and if he gave it a few weeks or months, he'd be wiped completely from his memory.

      Was that even worth it? It would mean suffering for one of them and that person wasn't Yujin, it would never be, because he'd just forget it all eventually and live life as he was supposed to, oblivious and trapped in Silesse with no way out. If Richard thought something was fine, then it was, no need to argue about it, but cracking a smile felt out of place too, so he sat there for a good long while and the wolf wasn't moving, he was taking the air in, felt the mantle being taken from his hand soon thereafter and now that he sat there and enjoyed the things he had, he wondered if that was all that there was to it, or if there would be more eventually. "Maybe I should", he answered. "But then I'd just drink more either way, that would defeat the purpose", he clarified. Yujin rahter felt like shit now than find himself completely intoxicated and poisoned by what he'd ingested and at what speed he'd done it. "Sure, if you'd be so kind, then I'll use the time to actually throw up", he said, closed his eyes - a nap sounded good, but out here, that couldn't be healthy, or anything akin to that. "Hm? Three in total, why?" Oh, now it dawned upon him. Nevermind, the cat was out of the bag anyway, so it wasn't worth anything to begin with.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "It's fine. I didn't want his dick near me anyway.", Richard elaborated, the fight had been a much better option. In the end Quan and him weren't a good fit, he was too... Richard didn't know. Too much of a brute? While he had liked being handled rough by Yujin, he couldn't replace Quan in his stead and feel good about it, actually it made him almost feel disgusted. But that was fine, not everyone needed to sleep with everyone, so now that he knew Quan wasn't his type and Quan pretty much knew that Richard wasn't his either, that was out of the way. There were plenty more fish in the sea that called itself Silesse. "I guess. But I was outnumbered. Only hit one of them...", Richard replied. It had been a stupid fight and he couldn't even remember the faces of those involved. He didn't know how brutal the people here could get if provoked and what could have happened if the woman hadn't showed up when she did. Richard wasn't sure if that had been his goal all along though, that it went terribly wrong, but it didn't and a save fight with Quan was probably the better option if he wanted to be hurt. Why did he want that in the first place though?

      "I'm the one trying to blow my brains out one way or the other, why are you too?", Richard asked. "Trouble with your girlfriend? Did she find out?" That was at least the first thing that came to his mind. Also he wondered if Yujin showed up because of Richard today, or because of himself, because he wanted him to join him meet his friends and get wasted, because something happened to him and his life last week. "Just... move around the corner before you do throw up or the owner here will be mad.", Richard suggested and eventually took the mantle and placed it around Yujins shoulders again, his hand remained there for another second. "Are you sure I can leave you alone for five minutes? I don't want you to pass out in the cold.", Richard asked somewhat worried. If he left now to find a glass of water, what would Yujin do? Throw up all alone? he could do that in front of Richard too, maybe he could give him some comfort. "Or should I bring you home?"

    • "Bold words for someone that took him up on the offer to fuck immediately after being asked", Yujin chuckled, but he knew as well as anyone that it onyl was a matter of time until something happened and Richard would figure out that someone else fit him better, that he didn't need some selfabsorbed prince who's ugly mug he couldn't stand, so why not make the blonde hate him? Sure, that would generally have been a nice idea, but Yujin didn't utter it, that would only lead to more than one of them feeling like shit and if he was terribly honest, he didn't want to ruin Richards time. "A punch is a punch, well done", he elaborated and he knew that ... well, what did he know, now? Yujin often enough claimed to know things, but actually, he didn't and he should stop trying to, none of that knowledge was going to offer him comfort when the prospect of his future was to stay and die in Silesse, without asking too many questions. "Considering your strength, that hit probably hurt a bunch." It only had taken one to break that stupid nose of his and one more would have propbably given him a nice concussion for two, but they hadn't because they couldn't go on and have a fight, back when it had broken out.

      "I don't feel like smoking so I have to compensate", he elaborated, but why was he, really? Because he disliked the sole thought of having to share Richard with a bunch of fellow wolves that might want a piece of sheep? Whatever the case, he wasn't all that sure anymore himself. "No, she doesn't know. Everything's fine in her little bubble." Thank god it was, if anyone talked too much, she'd rip someones head off - fuck, it did suffice if either of them would just shut up, or if she'd figure out that he was busy kissing a to-be-married man and considering fucking around with him and his girlfriend, after getting a non-verbal invitation. "I will, once I get up, don't worry, I just need a minute." He needed a few more minutes, actually, because standing and getting up was a hassle, especially now that a bunch of alcohol seemed to rise to his head and tell his intoxicated mind some funny things. "Not passing out, you can leave whenever you want for how long you want, I'm fine on my own", Yujin said, but now that he had his stupid mantle back, it irked him even more. Why didn't Richard just take it? This thing was annoying, but whatever, it didn't matter and it never would, he wasn't supposed to be nice, this wasn't a thing friends did, this was what boyfriends did for their girlfriends, so maybe the blonde was right to not keep it. "Don't feel like it and now stop worrying, go back inside and have some fun." Lest he'd start thinking about what he wanted to forget and went back to feeling like shit, much like Yujin didn't want him to and which was why he didn't want him around - everytime he was here, he left feeling unsatisifed.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "Well I though it would be fun and then he kissed me and I thought it was kind of shit.", Richard elaborated, was that too much information for Yujin? No, why would it be? They were no couple, so Richard could kiss whoever he wanted, he also kissed Kun after all, only to leave him embarrassed and whatever that look was. "Am I too girly for a wolf?", he suddenly asked. He probably kissed like a girl and he probably looked weaker and somewhat slim if compared to someone like Quan or Jia. Maybe that was the reason why Quan flirted with him and thought the blonde would blow him right away. Or maybe that was just normal and Richard thought too much about it. After delivering a hefty punch however, Quan probably thought differently anyway. Much as this nameless wolf he had a fight with knew now, though in the end Richard had lost that fight, right? "I'm not that... well thank you.", Richard answered. Was he strong? He tried to be, tried to get in form almost every day, that had to pay off somehow, right? But it seemed like wolves like Quan or Nayantai and Muhan were just built to be tall and strong, while Richard had to seriously work for it every day.

      "Why not?", Richard suddenly asked. Opium had a few advantages, for one there was no headache the next day and for two he didn't feel like throwing up after waking up as well. At least that had been the case last time. "Okay. good then." When Yujins girlfriend wasn't the problem then what was? But apparently Yujin didn't want to talk about it, because he let Richard play the guessing game, so he just stopped asking. "Let me help you up then.", Richard said and extended his hand towards Yujin again. He wasn't sure if that guy was able to stand on up on his own and he rather not have him sit here and throw up this close to the entrance. "Are you really?", Richard asked upon Yujin telling him he was fine on his own. It didn't have to be Richard who looked after him but ot felt like someone should and that although Richard was the one that was trying to get wasted today. Caring for Yujin however let him feel way more sober than he was, probably because it felt important to not fall over himself right now. "You don't feel like going home, but you also don't want to get back in? You can't keep sitting here...", Richard mumbled and looked at the entrance for a second. "Should I send someone else out here? Jia? Kun?"

    • "That's the Quan experience. He can't kiss or fuck for shit, but since he's bold and doesn't back off, you eventually agree and then you find out, like three minutes in, that beating him up is way more fun." How did this dude even keep a girlfriend when he netted himself one? Why was it always him that got to break up with the girls? Was he just faster to realize they were going to do it anyway, or was it some sort of magic ability that masked the fact that a big mouth wasn't going to fix something like that? "Why? I think you're perfectly fine. It doesn't mean shit that you aren't built like a brickhouse, trust me - I'm not, either, and I'm not made of glass." Yujin wasn't even all that girly, sure, adrestians probably viewed the world in a different light, but there barely was any distinguishable line between men and women in Thria - if you were born a woman and wanted to fuck shit up, not have children, or not wear something, who was going to stop you? Traditions were there to be shred up, abandoned, thrown out of the window, especially after what had happened after the war, so nobody was holding anything against anyone - and most thrians, probably, weren't straight either. "You are."

      That seemed to be it, he wanted some time alone, some time away and throwing up, chugging some water and then waltzing back down there to go lay down some more sounded good. Even if he decided to ditch all of them and go home instead, that'd be fine, there were other days. "No idea, I just talk and think too much stupid shit when I'm high." Like, for example, that Richard actually held some value to him and that the two of them belonged to one another, for some reason, but no, that was just drunk him talking, he'd have to shut up and shut it all out, this wasn't going to go somewhere. There it was again, the blondes pesky hand, but he took it, found himself back on his feet and once he did, immediately let go of it as if he would burn himself if he held his hand for any longer. "Yes, I'm good, stop worrying. Actually, stop thinking about me", the prince declared, and it did sound a bit harsh, but it was the truth. Again, he was occupying too much space in Richards mind and that was getting absolutely fucking ridiculous. "I'm not going to keep sitting here, I'll do what I feel like when I've thrown up and made my mind up - I'm either going to come back inside and bother all of you some more, or I'll walk myself home, whatever the case, doesn't matter", Yujin said, brushing all of this off. That ... really wasn't the best way, was it now? "No, I'm fine, but you'll think too much if you stay out here and keep talking to me, so now hush and go, I'll be fine. I've had worse."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "Is it always going like that? That's kind of sad...", Richard answered and thought about it for a few moments. "You know... I'm sure there's people who like it just the way he does it. I don't know how sex with him is, I just know that I don't want to find out and he doesn't either. Some things go together and some not." Quan knew what he wanted, was eager, rush and maybe a little bit clumsy, but that didn't mean that there were no girls or guys around that didn't appreciate that. Yujin often enough told Richard exactly what he wanted as well, without sugar coating or letting Richard guess what it was he thought and that was nice. He valued honesty and openness, even if he himself wasn't honest or open at all. Richard was a hypocrite but that didn't change the way he felt about other people. Sly and cunning wren't traits he liked and playing hard to get or fishing for pity or compliments wasn't either. He had been harsh and unfair to Yujin in the past, but that didn't mean that he had to change, not for someone like the blonde. "I don't know. My face? The hair? But thanks...", Richard answered Yujin, he still had doubts. "Do I kiss differently than wolves usually do?", he asked another question. Did he? Was Kun not expecting that? Richard could be different too, he kissed Quan differently, because the brown haired wolf demanded it implicitly, but Kun didn't state any preferences so Richard just did what he thought made him win. "You're too."

      "Alright. You don't have to if you don't want to.", Richard simply nodded. Yujin could do whatever he wanted but that didn't mean that his friends didn't worry about him, Richard included. Kun had worried as much as Jia did apparently. He didn't kiss him just because he could, Richard was pretty sure of that. Yujin was taking Richards hands an let himself be pulled up, only to let go immediately. Something was off, wasn't it? "I've got plenty of things to think about all the time and I prefer having something else in my head for a change.", he answered, but maybe he should just leave the prince alone. "Can you really make your way home on your own?", Richard asked. He didn't say that he wanted to stay with him, but he was able to drop him off at the entrance, right? He didn't want him to pass out on the streets, even he would catch a cold or worse. Silesses streets were probably not as dangerous as Myriads, but lying out here all night sounded like a bad idea. "Do you want to fuck me?", the blonde suddenly asked instead of leaving the wolf alone. "It helped before, right? I'm not trying to take advantage of you, you still seem like you can make your own decisions. If you don't want to, that's fine."

    • "Quan is the way he is, but some people like it - I personally don't, Kun doesn't either and you don't seem to be that fond of it yourself", he concluded. Sure, there had to be someone that liked it fast, rough and still sloppy, with all eyes on Quan, because Quan loved attention as much as the next best person, didn't he? "Sure, like you and spicy food, that doesn't seem to be a good match either", Yujin answered, but he didn't say that to tease Richard, because in all actuality, nobody had to like everything and there were thrians that grew up with nothing but spicy food, only to find out that ... it wasn't to their liking at all, once they'd tried and revelled in less spicy options. Wasn't that much like figuring out that something someone thought was meant to be ... wasn't actually supposed to be happening? Not only did that sound odd, but Yujin did have some realization himself. This was just like him, wasn't it? Drunk, absolutely fucking drunk, and he still was overthinking. "Your hair's fine, as for your eyes, they're nice, but ... that's nothing girly. And people won't come for you because they think you are, they just want to test the waters and see if you're openminded, or willing to play, which basically means if you want to get fucked", he elaborated, then shook his head. "Mh, depends? Sure, your kisses tend to be softer and a bit less sloppier, but when you're drunk, you kiss just like any wolf, which ... I don't know, wolf kissing is just disgusting sometimes." Who liked that much saliva on them anyway? They weren't actual wolves that were slobbering one another up. "I'll keep that in mind."

      Next time, maybe he could be the one that landed the first punch and then, well, he'd have beaten Richard up, but that wasn't going to mean that he wasn't going to have some new bruises and dislocated or broken bones himself, so maybe not now. "Mhm", he mumbled, he knew as much, but still, leaving Richard out in the open like wet laundry wasn't like himself either. Surely, there had to be a way for him to figure out something to get the blonde off his case, but somehow, Yujin figured that wasn't going to happen sometime soon - and it actually made him chuckle slightly. "Then why are you talking to me of all people? Whenever we talk for long enough, I give you bad ideas, piss you off and you leave me hanging like wet laundry on a sunny day and just run off. That feels ...", he wanted to finish that sentence, but it was stupid, especially now that he stood there, on both of his legs and felt the nausea crawling up to him even more. Should he sit down again? No. "I've got two feet to carry me, and a vague idea where that shitty palace is, so I'll be fine." He'd made it out of the den just like this, but he had gotten some unwanted help, so maybe ... no. Either he was doing this on his own or ... what? "I ... what?", Yujin sounded confused, he was, and he looked at Richard just like that - confused. "It ... I mean, it did but ... I don't know? Do you want to ...? Can I throw up first?" He'd like to keep the vomit off of Richard, thank you very much, but also he didn't want to feel like absolute dogshit while getting to fuck someone, but this would help somehow, wouldn't it? Fuck, was he blushing?
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • Quan was a flirty and needy bastard, but nice enough to spend an evening with. This had helped, it still did, Richard almost didn't think about his brother anymore, about his birthday. He was glad Yujin showed up, even if his face and his hand hurt now. "I've eaten plenty of that stuff inside.", Richard retaliated. He wasn't sure if it was as spicy as it could have gotten, but he still ate it, mostly because he knew he needed something in his stomach, if he didn't want to end up as bad as Yujin. "Well I'm sure you Silessians still care about looks and stuff, right? But I guess I have to believe you.", Richard answered. Did they flirt with him because he wasn't fucked by them before, or because he was from Adrestia and different? Did it matter? Did he care? He didn't know. Actually h kind of wanted to be part of all this without being looked at with those stares everytime he walked in. Thrian clothes wouldn't help, his hair was enough and the form of his face, his nose and eyes that was different than that of the wolves. "So since we mostly kissed when I was drunk, you're saying kissing me is disgusting?!",Richard suddenly asked and raised an eyebrow, maybe he even pouted a bit. Yujin probably didn't mean it like that and Richard didn't either, but hearing that was kind of odd and it made Richard want to prove him wrong.

      "It feels like shit? It hurts? That's... kind of the point, you know?", Richard finished Yujins question. Was the prince actually sad about that? Or was he mad? Richard couldn't quite tell but he felt bad, but at the same time that was what he wanted. "You know I don't want to get too close, right? So whenever I feel we are, I push you back. There's other reasons too. I'm a mess. I get triggered easily and sometimes I would kill to have your problems instead of mine. I'm not your boyfriend, so I don't want to deal with your shit, but when you look like you do now, I kind of do want to anyway. When I'm drunk and high I forget about how it feels to lose someone, that's the point of getting wasted, but then I also feel like having friends isn't such a bad idea and I'm inclined to listen. When I'm sober and the thoughts are coming back, I change my mind." He was too honest, wasn't he? But looking at Yujin, he wouldn't remember a thing the next day anyway. "I'm fine if you don't want to deal with that shit. You don't have to." Richard sighed, looked at the somewhat down and way too drunk prince of Silesse and wondered if he was the one that shattered him into pieces. He actually didn't want that on his resume, so maybe just walking away from him would be better. Maybe it was enough though, if he left before he could sober up. Whatever Yujin was feeling, he still didn't seem opposed to the idea of actually having sex tonight. "Sex helps me too.", Richard concluded, made clear that he didn't do Yujin a favor by proposing this. "Come on, you're throwing up eventually, let's get over there.", he finally sighed and just shoved Yujin around the next corner with more privacy for him to finally get some of the alcohol out of his system again.

    • Yujin knew he should have booked it out of here when he still had a chance, but he hadn't, for some stupid reason he couldn't understand and now he was paying for not doing that by being stuck with Richard once more - he had actually said he was going to get booze to get away from him, but for some reason, that had backfired tremendously. Why wasn't it his turn to push away the half-wolf, why as he accepting all of this at face value and why was he ... this sucked, this sucked a lot. "I wasn't trying to mock you, you ought to adjust to the food anyway", Yujin declared, but that was about all there was to it. No bad intentions, no anything, it had happened and it would very much happen again, sooner or later. "Yes, but ... everyone runs around in almost the same clothes, we don't care about gendering it all that much, you know? You aren't automatically viewed different if you are a woman, so I don't think someone would even bat you an eye for not looking manly ... maybe it's because you dress and look like a sheep", Yujin explained, but he was done and over with that soon enough, shrugged with his shoulders and let it be the way it was. Then, the blonde got something in the wrong throat, or did he, really? "I said it's disgusting sometimes, wolf kissing, that is. I hardly can care about that when I myself am drunk, high and slobbering all over your face, so no, no it isn't", he reiterated, shaking his head.

      This was going all sorts of ways, something his drunk brain didn't feel like comprehending. What did he feel like? Was he sad, nauseous, horny, or something entirely else? Yujin couldn't put his finger on it. "I know, but ... it still hurts", the wolf suddenly said - Richard was right, this had been the plan from the getgo, after all, neither of them wanted to be with the other for all eternity and putting something like a wall between them helped to realize that they'd gotten too cozy, too soon. "I know, you've told me that you want no strings attached and I also know that I'm sometimes too clingy and asking for too much ... I'll just try to take it for what it is from here on out", hell, since when could his own words hurt so much? He didn't know, but he said that, just like that, because that was the only way to get him out of this already hopeless situation. "That's fine, I signed up for this, right? It's my own fault for thinking about it too much and the wrong way, I'll stop bothering you with my problems and I'll just ... keep sleeping with you and dragging you here to keep your mind off of things, we don't have to be friends either, that's the way it's best, right?", why was he fishing for reassurance and why did he even say that? Maybe he did want to hear something else, but actually, just maybe, he didn't, maybe he needed this to sting and burn to just accept that thinking about their relationship had led him to crash and burn, and the shove helped. He was talking mad shit that had just been upset because his fuckbuddy had accepted an offer to sleep with another guy and then had gotten mad about that, wasn't he? Once he found himself out of plain sight, and a bit away from Richard, he actually did stick his finger in his throat and ... yup, he did throw up, which wasn't the most pleasant feeling, but it was just a bunch of alcohol - so now he'd better fill that up with some water, but first, he needed something to get rid of that shitty taste. "Done", he announced, but he didn't feel much better, just slightly less nauseous. "I'll go drink some water and then ... we can fuck, I guess?"
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • Richard didn't want to get hurt, he didn't want to lose someone, no matter which way, but he wasn't. Not at all. Because he managed to build a wall around himself and let everything just crash into it instead of himself. There were moments when he felt an odd sting, or when he thought about Yujins girlfriend a bit too much, but that was about it. He truly liked spending the night with it and whatever emerged from that, the feelings that didn't subside when they were done, but he almost didn't think about Yujin the rest of his day. Sometimes at night he wished for someone to be there, sometimes he thought about their nights, but it wasn't all too often, because all of that was drowned by other thoughts, thoughts of self doubt, fear and pain. He was fine with this arrangement, but maybe he should have paid more attention to Yujin and how he was doing with it, because Richard had the strange feeling that he was the reason Yujin was binge drinking today. He was using, maybe even abusing him without thinking about it and maybe he should have just stopped, but he was egoistic and at the same time thought that he was what Yujin wanted, so why not offer himself up? All of this was messed up and Richard deep down knew that he was wrong here. Richard snapped out of it, focused on their conversation, but food didn't matter, did it now? Neither did his gender or anyones intentions. "You're probably right.", Richard said. Did it matter if he was fucked because he was a sheep or not? "Good then.", he concluded after Yujin told him, kissing him wasn't disgusting after all. Very good.

      "If it does, why did you come by today?", Richard asked Yujin. He could have just ignored Richards existence, he could have let him sulk in his bed and let the blonde go to hell, but he showed up to cheer him up, or was there another reason? "You can sign out of it, you know? You don't have to keep up with my bullshit.", Richard made clear. There was no reason for Yujin to stay in a relationship that he didn't want. That went for Yin as much as for Richard, he didn't need to stay with either of them. He didn't need to be Yins boyfriend and he didn't need to be pushed around by Richard whenever he felt like it. The blonde did quite obviously give Yujin the option to leave, but that didn't make him feel much better, right? Richard stayed were he was, because Yujin didn't seem like he wanted anyone to hold back his hair or rub his back. Richard just waited at the corner and even turned around, because Yujin probably didn't want him to see him like that. When he was done, the blonde looked at him again and thought about if this was right once more. "We don't have to. You can also fuck someone else.", he said. Jia and his girlfriend had looked interested anyway. However, if Yujin wanted to drink some water, they needed to get down there again, right?

    • The blonde was right, Yujin could leave, could go anywhere he wanted and just let him stay where he was. Richard wasn't going to be in Silesse for all eternity, he would eventually get a move on, go back home, hope to reclaim that throne of his or do whatever - in the end, the few months or whatever it was that they'd spend down here would be wiped from Yujins memory, but remnants would remain and the more intimate those were, the more they'd hurt once all of this was done. Surely, there had to be something going on, but he should stop caring, just like he'd been asked to - there was no need to overfocus, there was no need to try and just be, to make himself likeable, to change for someone like Richard of all people. Yujin of Silesse was, well, whatever he was, but he sure as hell was someone that could use someone to love, someone that loved him back. "Wolves are narrowminded, just like you said", he added, and he wasn't wrong. Something, or rather someone, like Richard was foreign but nice to look at, even when he stood out like that and that meant that someone could eventually propose to fuck him, or be fucked by him, and the blonde wouldn't say no to it, he knew that now, and he'd have to stop waffling over it.

      "Cheering you up, because I don't like the look on your face when you're mad or sad", Yujin explained. This wasn't even a lie, he had wanted to help out, but despite the fact that he wouldn't have to see Richards face anyway, this needed a bit more honesty, didn't it? "And who likes to feel like shit constantly? Just because I'm hurt doesn't mean I'll let you be hurt", he elaborated further. Was he still selfish? Probably, for seeking Richard out and playing with him like this, for having him listen to his problems once more and Yujin, just for a bit, felt disgusted by himself. "I'm fine, I told you he last time that I wouldn't just push you away, right? I'm not going back on a promise I made." As much as it stund, that was it, but he still didn't want to - did he even feel like having sex or would this turn into the same thing like last time, when he fucked Yin before coming to Richard to fuck him, too, and then realize that the first fuck he had, had been fucking awful? For now, he wanted to get that taste out of his mouth, which was probably why he spat some more in the snow, but it was just yucked up saliva. "Jia can fuck his girlfriend alone, if that's what you mean. I'm not in the mood for either of them, plus, it's the same. It doesn't matter if I fuck you or them, it's going to be a fling either way, with no real attachment. If I wanted that, I'd have to get my ass out of Silesse and go get my girlfriend", Yujin elaborated and while it would have been nice to just grab Richards hand, he didn't - that would just sting some more. "But, actually ... is it going to be enough if I get my mouth sorted out and blow you?"
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • This somehow still felt wrong, didn't it? Giving Yujin the option to leave wasn't making Richard feel better about himself, but maybe he just needed some more booze or smoke. Should they go back and drink some more, or was this over because Richard already offered they could do something else? Well he had enough, right? He didn't want to throw up as well and right now he was still good, but he wondered where they could go. Richard didn't want to spend another night in that icy castle. He didn't want to feel trapped in there the next morning, or like he needed to hide. He either wanted to go after whatever they'd be doing or be somewhere were both of them needed to get up and go home eventually. He'd brought Yujin to his place, but that was too far away, a fifteen minute walk sounded stupid. He'd need some kind of inn, or abandoned hut, but there wasn't much options in Silesse. They couldn't even stay outside because it was fucking freezing cold. "All wolves?", Richard asked, knowing the answer. Yujin wasn't, he didn't care that Richard was a sheep, he cared about the fact that he needed help, that he needed a friend and for whatever reason he put up with all of his shit, just to make a stranger feel better.

      "Well you didn't see me before you came by.", Richard reminded Yujin. Was that truly a good reason? Well... didn't Richard ask him to come that day? To pull him away from his thoughts? He couldn't quite remember, because the smoke made his memory hazy... He was unfair to Yujin when he was high or drunk, wasn't he? What he said then just hurt Yujin the most. He was drunk and high now too, so he actually should have shut his trap. "So you're sacrificing your own happiness for a stranger? Are you always like that?", Richard asked but he knew better than that, right? Yujin wanted to help him, for whatever reason and at some point it would be too much for him, but he still wouldn't stop and instead poison his body like today, as if that was any help. "You don't owe me anything.", Richard elaborated but if he truly wanted Yujin to stop, it was Richard that had to make him stop. How? Well he didn't quite know, because getting rid of him had never been easy. Yujin was still spitting in the snow to get the awful taste of vomit out of his mouth, they should just go back inside though, or Richard should have left Yujin alone for a moment to actually get that glass of water. Yujin reiterated what their relationship was like a mantra and Richard made himself believe it, although he actually didn't. He was selfish. "I don't care.", Richard said, he didn't want Yujin to do anything that he didn't want to. In fact he could just not spend the night with Richard, when he did't feel like fucking, Yujin didn't need to please him. "Let's just get you some water first. Come on.", Richard concluded and with that, grabbed Yujins arm and dragged him with him back down.

    • "Most, not all", Yujin let Richard know, but there was no need to, the blonde already did and the real reason that they hadn't figured any of this out beforehand, before any of this, was because they both were selfish. Now that their relationship gave way, or rather now that Yujin tried to see it for what it was, it was stupid to get attached. Richard wouldn't fuck Quan, but he could as well fuck Kun or Jia, or any of the other nameless wolves. He had fucked different sheep before and Yujin had fucked different wolves before, there was no need to cry after spoiled milk, that wasn't going to have any importance anyway and if he was frank, it stung like hell right now, but even a wound like that would heal, especially if it was just an emotional one, rather than a physical one. "I know, but I still knew you were in a shit mood before I came by", he explained and he wasn't wrong, they'd talked about this, but everytime Yujin was trying to touch onto any of the topics from last time, he only caught onto the edge of if and once he figured that it wasn't worth it, kept discarding it and by now, their first meeting was barely there and their second meeting was slipping away too, just like that, he was happy he didn't forget how Richard looked at least, especially when they avoided one another for some time.

      How long until the half-wolf would push him away completely? Yujin didn't know, but he knew that he was somewhat in pain and he'd be in pain over it no matter what happened, but that was the nature of things and the nature of himself, his own pain, his life. "No, and I'm not sacrificing anything. If anything, I like making you feel ... good, or at least better than crap", even if their meetings ended on a sour note, Yujin was happy to at least coax some of that happy side out of Richard when they did meet, even for just a little bit, there was nothing else about it and he knew there wouldn't be anything, either, not as long as this went on. "Richard, I know. I want this, if not, I'd have pushed you away and you know this." He would, eventually, stop with all of this when it got too much, or if Yin found out, if he couldn't justify any of this to himself anymore or if he failed to see eye to eye with the things he was throwing away just to spend time with Richard. If he didn't care, that was fine, he actually let himself be dragged along and as soon as the door to their booth slid open, things had changed up a little. Some unfamiliar faces were gone, they'd probably pissed off to another booth, and so had Quan, who probably was going to take the night head-on. What remained of their little party was Kun, Jia and his girlfriend. "Looks like the party died", Yujin said, chuckling, then leaning forward to grab one of the glasses of water on the table and drink it down in one go. "Looks like someone threw up", Jia threw back at him, but ... that was about it, right? Well, until someone did appear in the doorway behind him and Richard. "Get a move on you two, if I knew you were going to have a quickie, I'd have gotten the booze myself", Quan said, brushing past them and seating himself next to Kun, who was awfully quite. "We were out there for maybe 10 minutes, if you think I can do that from start to finish, you underestimate me." "Or you're just shit at it", Quan barked back. "Shut up." "No, you shut up." Everything was back to the same old thing, he grabbed another glass, drank it down and then looked at Richard - were they going to say here for some more or would they go straight to fucking? "Where do you even wanna go?", he whispered, as he leaned over to reach Richards ear - that wasn't suspicious, was it?
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • So Yujin did remember what day it was, or didn't he? Richard didn't comment on it anymore, it was great that he came by and Richard obviously wanted to get out, because he came along without much of a fuss. He wasn't quite sure what he wanted here, but getting wasted felt good and now that he tried fucking Quan and noticed, that he actually didn't want to, he didn't want another failure and thus he turned to Yujin, who he knew was good in bed, right for him, somehow. It felt good when he didn't push him off the bed and he made him lose his mind better than any of that damn alcohol could with the plus side, that he didn't have a major headache the next day. Well, he still got drunk and would, but ending it with Yujin sounded better than passing out from the booze. "You make me feel better than good and that is something you know already.", Richard replied. Was he flirting? Well it was a fact and he didn't want Yujin to feel down anymore, this was stupid. "Good then, I won't ask you again if you're sure or not." That concluded it, right? Hopefully Richard made Yujin feel better than crap too, somehow. But he was pretty sure he did as long as thy both shut up.

      They were going back down to get something to drink for Yujin. Once they went back in the room there wasn't many people left all of a sudden. Either they god bored, or they went to have their own adventures, who knew? Quan wasn't here either, maybe he did seduce some of those girls after all and Yujin was chuckling again, which was a little bit weird. He had been gloomy all day, even before Richard left with Quan and now that he took a few minutes outside with Richard, he suddenly felt better. Yujin was drinking some water, as he wanted to and Jia pointed out what truly happened out there, well it probably was pretty obvious and explained why Yujin was able to stand up straight again. They didn't sit down and eventually Quan did appear again to brush past the two and sit down again. "Overestimate Yujin... you mean overestimate.", Richard corrected him, but it didn't matter, because Quan and him were going back and forth already, screaming over everyone elses heads. Yujin drank some more and Richard looked at the bowl he ate from before, then he listened to Yujin and afterwards looked at him. "Why are you whispering, they don't understand shit.", Richard pointed out and shrugged. "Is there some place that is not that castle?", he asked, but pointed at the bowl of food first. "Do you want to get something in your stomach first? I don't mind waiting." Yujin hadn't eaten all night, right? Then he looked at the others again and Kun who didn't say a word. Richard raised his eyebrow. "I know Quan is a shitty kisser, but me too? That traumatizing?"