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Nowadays, he liked routine and yet, that kept changing time and time again, to adjust to the needs of another, something he’d never thought he’d seriously do. It was nice, that change of pace, but somehow difficult to shoehorn into the rest of his life, even if it meant more warmth and comfort. Yujin would be lying if he claimed he wasn’t interested in Richard, or his story, or their shared life and he’d also be lying to both him and himself if he claimed that everything, all of it, hadn’t chang…

One cry session wouldn’t fix him and after mucking this entire day up, Yujin was eager to simply make things right again, despite everything. Was he in the right? Of course not, but his father had always told him that at times, one relented even if they weren’t wrong, to keep peace and make life for everyone around them easier. Stubbornness would only mean his own end and Yujin had to agree that he stood to gain nothing from keeping this up. He’d wiped his tears before long and decided he’d see …

This wasn’t his spot, nor was it his choice to make. Yujin understood that he, while not second to anyone Richard loved as a lover, he’d be second to what he had left, what he called family, unlike whatever his own was to him in this bizarre life he led. Both that and the realization that there was neither any use nor need for him to dramatize everything as much as he had. “You’re right, he’s not. Sorry.”, he relented and still tried to accept all of this. Would he leave with Richard and see Adr…

“I’m plenty fine and I’m doing fine, thank you for your concern.”, he cut Richard off in the end, citing all of this as ridiculous and below his own honor. What had he ever done to deserve this kind of treatment? Suddenly, it was as if he was all the same - even Richard treated him like he was too dumb to know what was good for him right now. Just like his father did at times, with that stupid look on his face, wrought and eroded by disdain and acceptance. Yujin frowned, visibly so and averted h…

"And who said you were dragging me down? Why are you frustrated on my behalf? Do you really think I'm just going to sit around and never once complain if I dislike something? That's not how this works, I'm doing all of this because I love and trust you and because I'd rather have fun with you than have you be all by yourself and not have anyone to talk to until I come back home." Wasn't it unfair that he hadn't changed? Yujin wasn't the same as Richard, likely why they didn't see eye to eye once…

Richard behaved oddly at times and Yujin was left wondering if that, too, was partially his fault. No matter how many times he tried to get them both on the same page, it seemed as if nowadays, he was stuck with ahving to adhere to but one thing: Keeping his own opinion to himself, critical or not, unless he yearned to make a fool of himself. On one hand, Yujin wanted nothing more than to make certain that he was doing the right thing and keeping this man both loved and save, on the other, he fe…

“You’re right.” Beating himself up over it was the sole way to atone for being an idiot - Yujin wanted nothing more than to go back to where he had opened his mouth, expressed his distaste for everything and then gone on a tangent about how he certainly had to be right because a gut feeling kind of, sort of told him he was. An asinine idea, undoable now, but he’d felt like he needed to say something and he was paying for that. Apologizing now, he was sure, would only piss Richard off and he’d no…

Who was to say that they both would ever truly understand one another like this? "He probably does. He's your brother after all." What had they started fighting for in the first place? Richard was right, it wasn't his place to judge and assume things, no matter what his stomach or brain told him could potentially be wrong about all of this. "You're right, apologies." This had to be anxiety, about change and all the difference that a leap in the great unknown could make - something that Yujin fig…

"I don't need him to do that, though. All I need is for you to feel better and like yourself again." Didn't matter if the journey would be long, or arduous, or wrought with hardships - Yujin had very well vowed to stay by Richards side back when he had carved that talisman, one he only had the foggiest memory of. Why was it so easy to remember some things, yet harder to remember others, even with the medication gone from his system? "I'm scared and you haven't talked about him in the nicest way …

And as Dayan achieved his goal, Yujin had nothing else to give - it wasn’t certain whether or not his usefulness had already run its course, but it was obvious that there weren’t as many opportunities to protect Richard in a place one would generally consider safe, like a castle in Adrestia. Out here, there weren’t many either and yet, having someone like Xu already added salt to this overcooking pot of boiling water. “And I’m glad I got you back and that I got to help you.” Claiming that it wou…

Seeing as this situation stood, perhaps his unwavering and unquestioning support of Richard would have been the better approach to tackle this issue with, and yet, Yujin could not and would not bend the knee to someone that he didn't think of highly. All he heard of Dayan, no matter if Richard missed his brother or not, were accounts of him being a brat, or worse, an asshole to the last piece of family he had left and thus, why would he make it easy? Out of his undying love for a far fairer, gen…

Clingy as if he were a guard dog and overbearing all the same, Yujin couldn’t help but wonder if it was within his blood to behave the way he did. Muhan was much the same, the father he shared no blood with, or so he’d heard - ever loyal to his other father, willing to kill and strike down any soul which’d dare interfere with that man’s grand plans, or coveted his imaginary crown. A sum of their worst and best parts, Yujin would dare to reason he was just that, if only he shared both their blood…

Richard was, despite everything, like a gentle, soft breeze in this awful life of his. All that he gave him, Yujin enjoyed, including the little touches and the gestures that urged him to push one way or the other. “My father? You think they get along?” No other way about it, if the might king of their neighboring country wanted to fetch his brother, weaving across the treacherous seas in a frenzy to retrieve what was lost, or in this case, discarded. Perhaps writing Shuren was nothing more than…

Yujin had thought he’d changed for the better, had made a difference and had become an entirely new person, only to still react with the same glee and the same excitement he’d always mustered whenever something worth the effort came up. Would he ever grow out of that kind of behavior? He sincerely doubted it, though he couldn’t help but feel as if that had only been natural, given his stupid disposition to forget even the most important things - Richard was the one making waves in that shallow p…

One year ago he‘d have tried to steal Richard away from the mountain of solitude he‘d been confined to, whispered sweet nothings into unreceptive ears and promised him to improve his mood to turn that sour frown of his upside down. Fortunately, time moved in odd increments and Yujin was crafty, both in heart and mind, having gained better understanding of that very someone that was both appalled by the transient nature of the life surrounding him and the inevitability of the world never stopping…

“All just blonde with blue eyes? No greens, no greys? What about Nayantai’s side?” Richard had mentioned his brother having different colored irises, not like a typical wolf would, but Yujin had never met anyone in his lovers family outside one father he could barely recall any feature of. Over him, a tall, imposing shadow with nary a smile loomed - instead of two eyes, there was but one with a hidden glint, sharp and all-knowing, despite the many years that had passed since he last seemed to ne…

“Even if I am, you still care a great deal about yours, like I do about mine. To me, you’re beautiful like this, but I get the insecurity, too. Is there anyone who had similar eyes in your family?” It went without saying that he’d always listen to Richard and take his concerns seriously, something Yujin would never miss an opportunity for to mention. Taking away whatever they had from one another didn’t seem like a brilliant idea, even if it was a deep-seated fear over anything else. “Harder tha…

“These? Your eyes?”, Yujin reached out to brush away a strand of strawy hair and tuck it behind Richards ear. His hand - his knuckles - lingered on the other man’s temple, as his own gaze lingered on his, two chestnut-colored marbles and the object of grievance. “So what? Who said wolves have to look one way, or sheep another? Do you feel any less close to them because of your eyes? If anything, you look just like the sum of their love, I’m sure.” Myriad’s late king was not a man Yujin had witne…

“Das weiß ich, es war nur ein Angebot.”, erinnerte er den Pechtropfen daran, der wieder an ihm klebte - seine Meinung mochte sich vielleicht heute nicht ändern, aber Rikiya war weder kindisch noch jung und unvernünftig; eine Nacht darüber zu schlafen täte ihnen beiden gut. Wahr war es, dass sie sich beide liebten, dass sie es nie geschafft hatten, ihre vermaledeiten Finger voneinander zu lassen und dass sie - offen und ehrlich gesagt - nicht einfach wieder dort weitermachen konnten, wo sie aufge…

"Meinst du, das reicht dir? Du weißt, dass ich dich nie abwimmeln würde, weil ich auf einmal kein offenes Ohr mehr für dich habe.", entgegnete er Caelan, auch, obwohl er froh war sich nicht immer mit derselben Thematik im Kreis befassen zu müssen. Caelan kannte genug von ihnen, die einfach immer nur zu ihrem König kamen, weil sie ein wenig jammern wollten - nicht, dass es verwerflich war oder er daran etwas auszusetzen hatte - er wurde es irgendwann einfach leid, ein und dieselben Themen abermal…