Suchergebnisse

"Don't let it cloud your judgement." Yujin wasn't wholly serious, but Richard was all of a sudden. He learnt from his mistakes and he didn't want Yujin to regret something too. "I can't remember either journey here but it took us months to get back to Adrestia. Now a ship is faster but they don't sail regularily...", Richard sighed. Additionally the letter needed to make it there first and then back. Maybe he'd get an answer to his first letter soon, maybe Nayantai would write him too. According…

"I think I'm over those...", Richard mumbled. He knew where they could lead and he probably didn't press this enough or talked too much about it, not in a way that made sense. He just blamed himself for what happened to Nayantai and him, as people did when they had no fault of their own, except he did. "Nope, no letter." The chances of one actually arriving today, the one day where he didn't want one, were very very slim, so that was probably fine. "Maybe I should go back out tomorrow then, wait…

"If I was still the same person you grew to like, I would have probably already punched him in the face.", Richard told Yujin honestly. He would have been too rash, too angry on Yujins behalf. He would have punched Quan in the face, then Xu and only then would he have thought about the consequences of his actions for himself and for Yujin. He would have probably made it much worse and maybe he did that now too. "I've been careful, I avoided your brother and told the guards I wanted to see if any…

Yujin had be unhappy and angry before, he fought with his father before too and hid away t the hut, even uninvited, just so he didn't have to go back home, but this seemed different. He had every right to be angry, annoyed, disappointed and many more things, but it was simply odd to see him like this. before, even when Richard pointed something out to hi Yujin probably was aware of, but didn't want to face, he usually complained, only to hide away and distract them both with something else entir…

"Yeah I... I think you had a right to know. Whether people try to protect you or not, it's your life, your body, I... Well I didn't have the right to stick my nose into this, but I couldn't lie to you." And ommitting was lying too. There was no two ways about it and Richard didn't want to be like the rest of them, making decisions for Yujin when he was very capable of deciding things for himself. Richard already did that to him, by simply leaving, deciding Yujin had no say in this and that he co…

Yujin didn't seem capable for a hearty talk right now and Richard respected it, he simply held him as best as he could. What would he have done if Richard hadn't showed up here? And why didn't he say anything, Richard wanted some space, yes, but if Yujin was in this much pain, of course he would have let him in. The world was cruel, it sucked, Richard wondered what he did for misfortune and pain following him around. First his father, then his siblings, then Nayantai and himself and now that he …

"I still hurt you, I know." That wasn't what Yujin said, but Richard was aware and he was sorry. Bringing him with him hadn't been an option either, but he could have stayed. In the end nobody could say what would have happened though. Maybe the guilt of simply living a life while all of his family, sans Nayantai, were dead would have eaten him up and it wouldn't have ended well either. He could still apologize to Yujin. Now that he remembered more, did that mean he remembered how Richard used t…

"It wasn't your fight and I didn't think I'd survive. You would have get hurt too and I didn't want that...", Richard let out. He regretted his choice, he regretted not simply staying here, for Nayantais sake and his own, maybe for Yujins too. He had tried to push Yujin away, to not let this develop into something more than a fling or distraction, but he failed miserably and he hurt Yujin. Saying goodbye seemed too hard of a task, for both of them and it would have invovled lies too. Richard wou…

"Maybe. It got me back on my feet once, but in the end I made the worst decision in my life and it didn't bring back my siblings..." Well one of them was still alive, but he also gained nothing from Richards stupidity. Worst of all was how he hurt his own father, the one he still had left and he wanted to apologize so badly for so many things and thank him for who he was, even if he'd been so incredibly angry at him too. He looked at Yujin with a pained smile, he still needed to fess up about ev…

Eating was a necessity at this point, nothing more. Richard didn't enjoy it, but he wanted to get stronger, so he did and yet, whenever he got some food now, he wasn't sure if he should eat it, or if Shuren just wanted him out of the way somehow. Now Xu was added to that list as well, according to Quan, if he found out what happened today. "I don't know if being angry all the time solves anything... it made me leave for revenge and it brought my dad and me great suffering...", Richard mumbled. I…

"I'm still not hungry, but I eat more anyway.", he told Yujin with a smile and in his own mother tongue, since Yujin seemed to want to switch. Maybe it just felt more private, at least his fathers didn't understand them, not that they weren't alone in here, but the thought counted for something as well. Still, Yujin acted off. Was it the situation with Yin and the fight with his father that still got him so rattled up? He usually wasn't like this, usually he found excuses for everyone and everyt…

"Maybe I'll get a bite of one of them tomorrow.", Richard smiled, tilting his head slightly. He wished for normalcy so much, for just more moments like this, talking about ones day, about a hunt and dinner or lunch, nothing much. None of it mattered, but it mattered to Richard. He felt warmer with Yujin around, but at the same time he felt like lying to him too now. He should tell him what he did today, not that there was much more information, but maybe this time Yujin would believe it too. He …

For a moment Richard was confused by Yujins answer, then smiled and shook his head. "I meant if you brought something home to eat.", he corrected. Yujin didn't seem like himself, he seemed oddly mature and tired. He wasn't cheerful as he usually was, not overbearing and even though Richard knew he wanted to respect his boundaries, Yujin often times simply failed at that, but now? He seemed distant, which was only fair after they hadn't spoken for a while, but this was a different Yujin. Even if …

Richard missed Yujin, he couldn't deny it. Even in Adrestia, when he threw everything away, he thought about him every night when Nayantai went to sleep and Richard instead looked to the stars for hours. Now was no different and he felt bad and stupid and all sorts of things, but he also knew that he was less selfish than the first time he just left. What he said to Quan wasn't true, he did what he did in Adrestia for himself, because he hoped it would make him feel better, not appease his long …

Richard couldn't avoid the guards, who surely noted that he came back with somewhat of relief. He avoided anyone else successfully and arrived at his room. He let himself down on his bed, holding his chest and breathing heavily. It had been a long walk but not only that, he wasn't sure what he was thinking when he stormed out like that and confronted Quan. It wasn't like he learned much new, but he probably poked a sleeping bear for no reason. And Yujin? He was nonthewiser and Richard could hard…

"All of you just want everything all the time. Sometimes that doesn't work. Sometimes you have to choose between your friends, or between your sons or between your family and the people you care about." If Shuren just let go, if he would let Yujin live his life elsewhere. If they would let him make his own decisions and not force him to obey his brother who had no right to treat him that way, just so they could keep both under the same roof. "Are you dense?", he asked Quan back. "Adrestias king …

"A choice? Everybody has a choice, always. Sitting idly by without trying to do something is as much a choice as springing into action. Muhan lets all of this happen and Shuren does too. Who cares who makes this medicine, they are all complicit, none of them are this stupid when even I, an outsider with a whole heap of own problems, could figure most of this out on my own.", Richard answered. Of course Muhan had a choice, he wasn't a child, he was a grown up man, someone that probably could take…

Quan was all bark and no bite, he acted like he was the strongest of all of Yujins friends, but in reality he was scared of but a single man that didn't even manage to kill his brother himself. He hid away in this hut, was scared to even attempt to live his own life and complained about everything. Richard, right now, wasn't a whole lot better, but he had a much better excuse, scars to show for, plenty of them, more than Quan would ever sport. "The one you don't want to lie to anymore. The one n…

Richard rubbed his arms a bit, trying to warm up. Even though the castle was made of ice and he ventured to other rooms like the library or the hallway, it was even colder outside and he hadn't be prepared to venture out like that without a second thought. No, don't thin about it, if he did maybe he regretted his choices too much and he couldn't have that right now, he couldn't be terrified or worried about how he'd even go back. Why would he be scared if it wasn't death he was afraid of? There …

Richard felt like he was his father, needing breaks whenever they went somewhere, not joining when it got a bit more taxing. He had inherited his own health problems, but nothing as bad and still, now, he hardly was able to keep up with Quan who glanced back over his shoulder every once in a while. He had even less context than Yujin and was probably also less aware of anything that was going on in Adrestia, in his view Richard was here, loud and out to fight and the next moment he was whatever …