bloodbound. (earinor & akira)

    • “I’m not insane. Just rash. I didn’t even know you packed rope.” This discussion was leading nowhere, he knew as much, but he’d rather be honest to someone like Richard, even if that meant he acted like the absolute fool he was. Yujin wondered why he had agreed to this, was it really because he had the most awful crush on the worst possible person? Or was it because the opportunity to disobey his father was sweeter than anything he could have ever possibly thought about tasting? “Well, shucks.” Then no memories for the blonde, what else could the wolf offer him? There were plenty of things, but none of them felt appropriate, not when his own head reminded him of the mistakes he’d made today. Sure, he did figure something out about himself, however, barely any of that information was usable and he felt as if no matter what he’d try, he’d find himself at the end of the road sooner than expected. “There isn’t much difference, to be honest. It’s just a tradition, it’s not like they’d force you to attend a big feast after, if that’s what you’re trying to avoid. It just is supposed to show you what the rest of your life is going to be like. Not that it’ll tell you much … but if your brother would, you might as well. And if you need a final push, I can give you that.” Was he even enough for Richard to consider all of this to be something worthwhile? It didn’t seem like that, not right now anyway.

      “Stop with what? Asking? If that’s what you want, I can do that, but that’d be a waste of a reward.” Rather than a rightfully earned prize, it would be a condition to getting filled in about what the prize was in the first place - was that even the right thing to do? The wolf sighed as he turned, lay on his back for a short while and then, as he sat back up, eyed his eating partner in crime. Was it always so awkward between the two of them? “You started it, that’s hardly an excuse to call me mean. It was payback”, he insisted. That wasn’t a nice thing to do, Richard was right - and the wolf didn’t quite care, instead he grabbed the bread he’d brought in here earlier and wanted to cut it up with the knife he … had left outside the tent. For fucks sake. Yujin put it back, he wasn’t all that hungry to begin with, and instead eyed the blonde that ate ever so diligently. “About your reward, but if you have nothing except getting me to shut up, just say the word and I’ll zip my mouth as tight as I can.”
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "I thought it would make a fun memory?", Richard asked, but he didn't intend to fight, not at all. Instead he rested his arm on one knee and leaned on it a little bit, while he continued shewing on that meat. It wasn't the best in the world, but it filled his stomach and that was all it needed to do. But he didn't want to eat a whole bunch right now, he didn't feel up for it, which was rare. He probably started thinking about Dayan way too much, but he missed him, especially in a scenario like this and especially with his birthday coming nearer. He probably should do something to honor him, something he would have liked. Richard knew that he wouldn't want him to seek revenge and to die a stupid and avoidable death when he could live happily here, but the blonde couldn't go on like this. Every time he thought he could he had one of those dreams and everything felt like it happened yesterday. At least he could do that tradition though, right? For Dayan. "Does this need any preparations? Some special priest or something like that? Invitations? I dunno...", Richard asked with a deep sigh and looked up at the ceiling, to no point in particular. Nayatai probably knew all that too.

      "Well I don't need one.", Richard explained once more and ate the last piece of meet he held in his hand and packed up the rest again. Yujin himself grabbed the bread, but he didn't eat it then and put it away too. That was fine, that meant Richard could put all of that in a corner of their tent and out of the way. "Doesn't matter! You're a bad dog and that's that!", Richard scuffed only to keep the argument going, because it was better than silence right about now. "I can't think of anything I want right now.", Richard explained once more, what should he ask for? He had no clue, did Yujin even have something to offer? If Richard wanted to talk, or a hug, he'd get one either way as well as probably almost anything else. Yujin wouldn't say no to a hug, or a kiss, or... "Actually..." It didn't disgust Richard to be touched by Yujin and he had seen him naked already. The blonde was feeling cold and thus his limbs were stiff and hurt a little bit, the floor was no bed either. "How about you massage me?" Was that an outrageous reward to ask for if it came from Richard?
    • "It would but then we'd ... no, nevermind, it's dangerous, just, screw you for fucking up my shitty, baseless logic!" That wasn't exactly an argument that had worked out in his favor, but Yujin would have to make do with whatever he had - in this case, he'd just relinquished the mental highground to Richard, who always had it anyway, unlike the wolf prince. Why was it so hard to win against this stubborn halfling anyway? Something told him that, even if he ever were to be right, he'd have to give it up to satisfy Richard with his response, or he'd just never be right ever again, as long as the blonde was around and the two of them were in a somewhat sober state. Did that really matter? Yujin didn't recall a single instance where he'd been quite right before Richards arrival, so he just chalked it up to stupid, childish ideas that both him and Quan came up with whenever they pleased. "Preperations? Not really, unless you want some sort of fanfare while you disappear into silessian wilderness. You need nothing, just your garments and your weapons of choice, maybe a horse and some camping gear, for the uncanny occurence that you're unable to catch anything. But that rarely ever happens." Sometimes, the animals just seemingly knew that someone was on the prowl and they appeared in fewer numbers, but aside from that, there wasn't anything that was quite out of the ordinary.

      "That's fine, if you say so", and with that, he actually thought about laying back down and letting himself be reclaimed by slumber, just because he could and yesterday night was eventful, yet short. Why didn't they just waste their time at the previous location? Yujin wasn't sure, but he liked it here, there was no billowing wind and no whispers coming from all sorts of directions - the cave felt oddly safe, yet, he wasn't even convinced that it was. "Dog? A bad dog? That's not fair! I'm a good boy! I do whatever you want me to and more!", Yujin insisted, but it seemed as if this silly argument would be going for a while after this. Was it really all that he could and would ask for? No matter the reason or circumstances, he couldn't quite understand himself in a situation like this anyway. It was odd, in more ways than one. "That's fine, I'll let you think then, I could use a nap anyway." The wolf could have called it a silly afternoon nap, now that he'd eaten his food, but he hadn't had a bite, not since he had felt as if the earth was desperately trying to reclaim him, pull him into his own, frigid grave and keep him there for years to come. None of that happened and now he sat there. "Actually, what? Made up your mind yet?" Of course the blonde had, but what came out of his mouth next made the wolf confused - he looked at Richard, puzzled and kind of baffled. "A massage? Just your limbs or your torso too? I mean, I doubt I can do it, now that I'm such a bad dog." Was the bedding out here that bad or did Richard just have shitty bones?
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • Richard scuffed again, it almost felt like a chuckle. It was fun to twist the words around and make Yujin lose the argument like that, especially if he got mad about it, though this was all fun and games right? For some reason Yujin truly managed to make Richard feel good about his life in some occasions, he even managed to make him almost laugh and that without any fever or alcohol this time. The blonde looked at the wolf for a moment and asked himself how he even got to be his friend. They were friends, right? Richard never wanted any, but it happened anyway and now he was somehow glad, even though it would make leaving a tad bit harder. "So I just go on a hunt for my birthday, alone of course? And then where do I bring that carcass to?", Richard asked. Maybe anyone could interpret it, who knew? Maybe it was enough if he brought a dead fox to Nayantai and was done with that? That sounded way less exciting than he thought and then it was pretty useless too, because it was just a normal day on which he maybe wore something different than usual, though if he was able to skip that he'd probably do it. Richard wondered what Nayantai thought about that. Would he be happy if Richard would do it? That were also his traditions, right?

      "Really? Often enough you argue with me, you know?", Richard answered. Or he just wrestled him to the ground and Richard landed in the snow whether he wanted to or not. Or he argues about a reward Richard didn't need or want. That's not what a good dog would do, right? But it was funny that Yujin wanted to be a good boy instead of not a dog at all. "A nap? Well I guess you didn't sleep much last night.", Richard nodded, but it was still bright outside and Richard didn't know if he wanted to sleep yet. Sleep wasn't something he fancied anyway, he'd just have a nightmare again. Richards suggestion about something else, something concerning his reward made Yujin look confused however. "Arms, legs, back,...? You can make up for it if you do that good? But I guess you don't want to give me my reward after all, I knew you were a bad dog anyway.", Richard replied. Yujin wanted to give Richard something, right? A massage was always nice and Yujin would be able to somehow, right? Hopefully.
    • Did he just make Richard laugh? It felt uncanny, not that it hadn’t happened before, but there rarely seemed to be anything that got the blonde out of his quite depressed, if not cynical and uninterested state where everything - and everyone - was merely an obstacle in his way. Was Richard right? Why were the two of them friends in the first place - because of stuff like this, the small moments they ended up sharing with one another? It seemed almost ridiculous and yet infectious, especially when he couldn’t help but grin back at him. “Considering you catch something, or rather kill something, you’d drag it back and ask one of the elders. Sometimes they’ll do your bidding, sometimes they won’t, but if they don’t, asking a priestess would also suffice. Given you can find one”, the wolf mused. A priestess - or priest - was no rarity out here, it just meant that a lot of them were not going to do everyones bidding, not if they weren’t compensated by some means. Surely, Adrestians knew that money did rule the world itself, but now that things like that found their way into a land that had no currency whatsoever, even the holy people started asking for favors and other things in turn for their respected services.

      “If you would have went for a dog instead of a wolf, you might have gotten a good dog! No wonder I’m a bad one if I’m not even a dog!”, the wolf chuckled. Was this all of the arguments that he had? It seemed like that, Yujin knew as much, but how else would he argue against someone like Richard at this point? Now he wanted a massage from said bad dog, despite not even praising him - what a bad owner! “I can stay awake for you, you don’t look like you want to waste your day away like that.” Was he really able to? His head felt heavy and his heart was, evidently, thrumming against his chest - he still upset about all of this, but that sounded wrong, too. “I’m not a dog and I’m not bad either! Lay down already”, he grumbled, but he grabbed Richards hand and rolled up his sleeve, massaging the blondes hand first, just to let his hands wander up his arm. For now, the position worked anyway, but Yujin was careful enough to not exert too much pressure. “Who knew that that’s also a viable reward … does that even feel any good? I mean, I fixed your jaw when you had your squabble with Quan, but I’m not sure if I’m much use for anything else in that regard.”
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "Are you saying you think there is a chance I won't catch anything? Is there even a time limit or something?", Richard asked acting almost a little bit hurt. Of course he'd catch something! He was good at hunting and around Silesse he knew the best spots from Nayantai anyway. He'd find an animal to kill and bring back home. He'd also not miss his shots. "One of the elders? Who counts as one? I don't think they ever saw me. I also don't know where to find them.", Richard said, he didn't even know those people existed up until now. "Do you think they even care about me? Maybe they'd just shoo me out." Given he was looking more like a sheep than a wolf. Was it enough to have Nayantai as his father? People respected him at some point, right? But then he chose a life with the hated sheep, in Adrestia, he cast away his title, left his people and lived with his new king, instead of being a king himself. Richard was sure many people didn't like the fact and thus being his son wasn't even that useful probably. Rather the opposite. "I also don't know where to find a priestess and I feel odd not even knowing the names of most of your gods, but asking for a favor."

      "A wolf can be tamed, you know? And then it's also basically a dog.", Richard answered, though he wouldn't know how he'd train Yujin. This was an odd thought in itself anyway. "We have not many options to do anything though.", Richard said, what about after the massage? They didn't bring any games and Richard didn't want to walk around in the snow if he was terribly honest. Not when he didn't have any dry clothes to change into. Though maybe he just should be less of a pussy. Before Richard could lie down however, Yujin already grabbed his hand to roll up his sleeve. His hand was so very warm, despite having dug a hole in the snow not to long ago, Richards hand in comparison was probably close to an icicle. This already felt nice, he didn't even need some well placed pressure. But it felt odd sitting there and not knowing where to look at. "I'll tell you if you're bad at it.", Richard simply replied, sitting here now, with his hands in Yujins and not knowing what to say. This wasn't like he imagined it, he imagined just closing his eyes and hiding his face in some fur. Instead he got a little bit embarassed right now.
    • “There’s no time limit, just frustration. You can give up if you want, I mean, there’s people that were out there for days and never killed anything because they couldn’t find anything”, he elaborated. Yujin knew one person that was like that, but in the end, it made little sense to allude to them - Richard wouldn’t feel good about being compared to someone like that, at least the wolf thought as much and therefore let the topic slide. What was going to come from constant comparisons anyway? It was as if he’d try to allude all of the things that the blonde did to his brother, just to hurt him on purpose and without much thought. “Never seen any of the husks around town? Either way, I’ll just show you the way when you bring something back. They don’t get to pick and choose, they are there to give you blessings, not misfortune.” Not only that, they were supposed to be wise beyond their years and not easily deterred by the fact that a blonde, adrestian-raised halfling flung a carcass on their dining table because they’d pissed him off - that actually was a scenario that Yujin could imagine pretty well. “That’s fine, a lot of thrians don’t believe in the old gods anyway. Some do, I do, but whatever, if you’d like me to talk about them, just say the word!”

      No celestial entity from old myths would help him, though - Yujin was, sometimes, helpless in many regards, maybe a bit too optimistic as well, but he didn’t care all that much anyway. “Quite the feral dog and you haven’t put any effort into taming me, you’re a bad owner! I’m just a poor wolf!”, Yujin suddenly complained and he’d gotten roped into this again, hadn’t he? Not only that, Richard was seemingly good at making him do his bidding, which was why the wolf kneaded away at his skin in the first place. What a shame, wasn’t it? He could have done so much, now he acted like nothing more than a servant to the blonde. “We could have brought oil and the massage would have felt better, too.” That wasn’t even intended to sound as horny as it did sound - there was scented oil for a reason and he was sure that giving Richard a good knead wasn’t going to kill the blonde, either. “You’re so silent, it makes me nervous, though”, he complained as he moved on an finally stooped, just to hold Richards hands like that and look up, in his eyes, that stared back at him as diligently as ever. “Uhm”, the wolf mumbled, squeezed Richards hands ever so slightly and had stopped massaging for a second. Then, however, he grabbed the blondes leg and lifted the fabric of his pants as far as he could before going back to kneading - the silence was awkward, wasn’t it?
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "I won't. I wouldn't give up. Anyway, I'm sure I'll find something.", Richard answered. How stupid would he feel if he went out there and came back with nothing. No, he would never do anything like that and if it took him more than one day he ought to bring back something big, like a deer or something, though he didn't know if there even were any. Thus far he hadn't seen one, but one of those elk things, that would work. He'd not settle with a raven or a squirrel either! What did Yujin say he brought? A fox? Richard forgot what that had meant for his future. Well he also didn't remember every little detail. "I'm not at town very often.", Richard explained, maybe he walked past one of those elders, but he wouldn't have noticed. "You do believe in them? Why?", Richard asked then, there couldn't be any gods, the world was too unfair for that. Maybe at some point Richard believed in Adrestian gods, but then again both his parents weren't very religious. Most Adrestians weren't actually, there were some traditions that were upheld, it meant good to pray for a safe return, but that was about it. "I'm good though, I don't need to know."

      "Don't you do your first trick right now? Massaging your owner? I do train you, your little dog-brain just doesn't notice it.", Richard replied and for some reason this discussion was incredibly stupid but at the same time incredibly fun. Richard even smiled just a tiny little bit for maybe half a second. Sometimes he truly wanted to laugh or smile, but something stopped him, it was odd and he felt bad for looking at Yujin with almost the same face all the time. "Bringing oil is one of your jobs. See? There you go, bad dog." Richard himself didn't even own any oil to begin with, but storing some in his room probably wouldn't be bad. Then again he didn't know where to get it and if he did it was just embarrassing. "Silent?" Yujin was right. "Maybe I'm just enjoying this.", Richard lied, but was stopped in his tracks anyway when Yujin just held his hands like that. He looked back at him, not sure what was going on, or what this meant. The next thing that happened was Yujin suddenly grabbing Richards leg and pulling him out of balance for a moment. Richard decided to lean back anyway now, while he felt Yujins warm hands on parts of his skin. "Maybe you can tell me about your gods after all. If nothing else it'll be a good story."
    • “You’re stubborn”, the wolf reiterated, knowing fully well that nothing would deter Richard from at least dragging something home, however small or big it may be, it didn’t matter much - fate was fate and it was sealed the moment he killed the first thing he saw. “I know, you live your life like a hermit. Sounds like I should come by more often and drag you outside, you’ll just get lonely … maybe I should just move into your hut, how’s that sound?” That was a joke, he knew as much and he giggled ever so slightly about it. There was something going on, maybe a bit too much - but whatever, he’d make do with all of it, whatever he wanted to or not and he’d figure out what Richard liked or not, too. “Why? Don’t know, or rather, I guess it’s just … it’s nice to think that there’s something out there, you know? Someone, something - things happen for a reason.” That was barely a good explanation for something like that, yet, his fathers had never expressed much interest in the gods - at least not Shuren, who thought of them as nothing but a cheap excuse to justify horrific choices, wasn’t it that?

      “Little dog brain? More like damaged wolf brain. But that’s besides the point, I won’t let you tame me! If anything, you better be nice to me.”, he insisted, but he wasn’t going to stop being obedient now - that would just be mean and after all, a reward or a prize was just that and someone had to give Richard something. “My job? You can bring some too! You’re the one that wants to get pampered and fucked real good, you might as well bring what you need for that, I’m just a smallbrained dog! You’re a bad owner!”, the wolf whined, but the two of them were both at fault - if they had considered they might want to have sex out here, one of them would have thought about some oil, but neither of them had. Weren’t they both stupid, bad dogs? Or rather a bad, barely tamed wolf on a chain, mismatched with his equally bad owner - they caught the ire of one another and Yujin just went and kept going like this, since he neither received honest dismissal or approval. “What do you even want to hear? About the plethora of gods we have, about the fact that there’s almost one for every occassion, as stupid as it may be or as useless as it sounds. Any god in particular you’d want to hear about? Something you’d be interested in?”
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "I am. That's nothing bad, is it?", Richard asked. Being stubborn only meant that he wouldn't let anyone hold him back, or tell himw hat to do and it meant that he'd do whatever he set his mind to. Wasn't that how Nayantai and Rain raised him? They always told him he could do anything and achieve great things. Well they were wrong, because he lost his goddamn country and his fathers legacy was done with. Either way, he was not raised to give up, which was probably why he was still alive in the first place. "I don't live alone. I live with my f... Nayantai.", Richard said and he wasn't sure why he didn't call Nayantais his dad. He was. But for some reason he was angry at him, yet that anger disappeared slowly, which was why he almost slipped. "Please don't move in with me.", Richard almost begged, that was not a nice thought or prospect. It would be too noisy and Yujin was way too clingy. Richard would probably lop his head off at some point. He enjoyed their trip somehow, but there were times when he just wanted to be alone. "I... mh... if you say so." That was all Richard responded to that because he didn't want Yujin to stop believing what he wanted to believe. But if there were gods they sure hated Richard. For a reason? For what reason should they kill Richards father way before his time, his siblings too and take away Richards kingdom? Either the gods were all assholes that hated him, or they didn't exist and he rather didn't have a holy army chasing him. They never protected anyone from his family, so they could fuck off.

      "A minute ago you were complaining that I didn't tame you yet. Now you tell me you won't let me? Either way, we'll see about that.", Richard answered. Yujin couldn't make up his mind, could he now? Not that Richard needed him to remember a specific trick or anything. "You are a small-brained dog, but that's not what matters. I don't even own any oil and I also didn't ask you out here to be fucked. You're the one always coming back to me like a boomerang.", Richard answered with a scuff. He wasn't out to be fucked by Yujin all the time! Not at all! Richard closed his eyes and put his arm over them while he listend to Yujin ask what exactly he wanted to know. "I don't know. Anything. I don't know much about them, Nayantai isn't very religious.", he explained and if he knew what he wanted to know, he probably had all the answers already. "I just want to hear a story. I don't know. How this world came into existence? You sure have a theory about that, right? Some goddess tears or something?"
    • "Who knows, sometimes being stubborn is useful, other times it's a hassle", the wolf answered. Yujin had a few things on his mind, but that was nothing out of the ordinary, much like Richard letting his thoughts run rampant wasn't. Their little squabble was fun, he had to admit that, even when they were just trying to find holes in each others statements, as if nothing in this world would deter them from getting what they wanted. Wasn't it stupid to think about all of this as a necessity, rather than just a grand old time that they always were supposed to have? "You live with your dad, got it - why do you call him by name anyway? Isn't that weird? I mean, I don't know about adrestian customs, but Shuren would give me a good beating if I called him by his first name - it actually feels weird." Were adrestians just not as held up by all of those customs or was he merely losing his own mind at this point? Yujin wasn't sure, maybe he was the stuck up bitch, but that'd be quite the eventless life if he only adhered to rules that had been set in stone before. "Can you even stop me if I forced myself into your home? I think we'd have fun for maybe two days and then you'd murder me", the wolf mused, going on and on about this wasn't so bad. Wasn't there also the slight possibility of Richard being Thrias heir? That'd be fun, too. "If you're going to let me wait for too long, I'll tame myself", Yujin grimaced. Or he could try disobeying Richard and ruining the situation, that'd be fun, too, no? Well, except for the last part, having a pissed off halfwolf wasn't his main goal today, actually, he'd like to keep it the way it ways right now. "Yes because I know who owns me! Also, if you don't have any oil, I'll bring some over. You'll need it."

      Was that an offer or a threat? He wasn't sure himself, but the way he'd spoken it made it sound like either, as if something was going to transpire either way and Richard couldn't do much to stop it, even if he sincerely tried. "So your father isn't religious, what about your other one? He would have had adrestian gods, or do you only have one?" Why was he asking anyway? Despite not retaining any of this information, he didn't know what to tell Richard, even after being given pointers. Sure, there were things he could say and do, Yujin knew that, but he had never really thought about all of this - he just decided to believe, with all of his small dog brain, that good things came to good people. "Mh, not quite. There's an arch goddess, with a stupidly long name, that created the land we live in in a vast body of water, before splitting into multiples and making up a few of the older thrian gods. One of those gods, or rather godesses, tries to recreate sentient life, something akin to her fellow brethren, but whenever she tries, she only ever finds herself indulging in selfish desires and failure. Once she does succeed in her futile attempt, however, the child she ends up bearing is without the powers of a god. Too bad her kin doesn't want something as useless as this and instead, they banish it onto the barren land they created back when they were whole - the goddess keeps adding to the barren land to the best of her abilities, but because she isn't quite the powerful god herself, it stays quite barren. Once her own child, who aimlessly wanders the lands struck with hunger and thrist, grows up against all odds, it decides to blame its own mother for their shortcomings - and decides to strike down its mother, as well as the rest of their family. The day it succeeds, snow fell upon Thria and engulfed all of it. Or something like that. It's kind of like an allegory to a mothers heart, once big and full of love, turning into a clump of ice."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "You mean it's a hassle for you and other people.", Richard pointed out, why would his stubborness be a hassle to himself? And why would he start something if he didn't ended it, that was the reason he was stubborn, right? Was he always? Kind of, though he knew when he didn't have a chance to win something and eventually he stopped trying. Dayan beat him in too many things and never wanted to do the stuff Richard was better at. Well, it was fine, whatever his older brother wanted to do, Richard wanted to. Now that he was all alone, deciding by himself, he still chose the path more akin to Dayan than to himself, wasn't that odd? Maybe not, because he had to live for both of them now. "Hm?", Richard voiced then sighed. "If you call out 'dad' how would they know who you mean?", he asked, but it wasn't the reason. He called Nayantai dad before as well as he called his actual father that way but... "I guess I'm angry at him. He isn't who he ought to be. You know stories about him, right? How come he doesn't fight for his dead children and instead hides out here then?" He knew he was sad, heart broken actually, he was even before the assassination, because he lost his partner he loved so much. But even more reason to fight for what they both had built, but he didn't.

      "I kicked you out of the hut once, didn't I?", Richard remembered Yujin and after that they both barely spoke a word to each other. Damn that dinner had been awful. "Do that then, less work for me. Teach yourself some nice tricks.", he responded and scuffed once more. "At least you know and admit it." Yujin wasn't his dog, nor was he his something else, but he was stranegly loyal, wasn't he? Had he even had sex with his girlfriend since their talk in Quans hut? Or did he ignore Richard who told him that he was allowed to do whatever he wanted with whomever he wanted, even though Richard was supposed to stay true to Yujin. That was totally fine for him anyway though, there was no one he had an interest in anyway. "I don't think I'll need it there. Nayantai sleeps literally next to my room, I doubt anything's happening in my bed.", he pointed out. That would just be... odd. Even though Nayantai wasn't home much. Richard still lay there with closed eyes, enjoying the touch he received, but he was the one whos turn it was to talk apparently. "Multiple gods. My father didn't believe in them either. Our families conclusion had always been that there were none, or that they hate us. My father was born sick and that's why he died young. Nayantai had been dealt a shit set of cards as well. My body doesn't work either. Both of my fathers have brought piece to two countries and their children were killed in turn, except one. Why would gods let something like that happen? If they exist, they can fuck off." He never had done anything to deserve any of this. There was no higher being, just tough luck. And his family was just not blessed with any form of luck. At least Yujin told his story now, it let Richard think about something else, something that wasn't his shitty life. "How does Adrestia fit in that story?"
    • "No, for everyone involved. You'll get yourself into an awful situation at some point with how stubborn you are. Dare I say it might as well be your downfall.", he simply pointed out. Yujin was aware that nothing in this world worked the way that anyone wanted it to, which was fine, more than fine actually. Whatever the case, there often enough was a multitude of things to do, some that compared to others just fine, others that didn't at all and what happened after that was him, being stuck eternally between decisions he wasn't supposed to make in the first place. "I tried calling Shuren father and Muhan dad, but there's just one word in thrian for it, at least a single formal one that I'd be allowed to use, but they just understand somehow", the wolf answered, shrugging his shoulders - he eyed the blonde all the while, as if he were trying to figure out what it was that bothered him - or if there even was anything that did. Was it because he had chosen another sore topic instead of riffing on and on about gods? "I don't know him all that well personally, so this isn't my place to judge but ... have you considered that he's, I don't know, tired and fed up himself? I know you aren't feeling much better either, you let on as much, but you both are just acting like broken gears, working in tandem against each other than with each other. Also, why does my father lock me up here? Because he's scared. Not that yours is the same, but there's only you that he has left, you know." Was this an appeal at the blonde to start being nicer to people, or just a futile attempt at fixing something that he better should have never touched in the first place? Yujin wasn't sure, he didn't care. It was still somewhat cold in the tent, it became even more apparent now that his outer layers were missing. Was this Richards fault for rubbing that stupid snow into his face? Were his cheeks still red? There was no way to answer that, which was why he went back to massaging - and wondering if any of this would ever be any good to either of them.

      "You did? Was I that annoying? What did I do?", Yujin wanted to know, the incident itself seemed to be completely wiped from his mind, but not the aftermath that had ensued, even though he wouldn't tie those two events together, not like this. "I'm loyal enough to teach myself, but you'd have to watch, after all, I'm small-brained", he scoffed and underlined it by showing the blonde his tongue, unsure if he'd even take note of it with closed eyes. "No wonder you're always so pent up and desperate when we meet!" Richard abstained from touching himself? That was not only incredibly lame, it also sounded as if before he came here, his life hadn't been any more exciting - but it also gave Yujin an idea, some sort of devious plan that made him grin. "I'll bring some over anyway, just to have a reason to come over." Wasn't there something about a coat, too? He'd already forgotten that, not like it mattered much. "Sounds like a valid reason to hate gods on your end", he mused, but then let go of the blondes leg and softly pushed him against the fur instead, to get access to that back of his and maybe knead him through all the way. "The first thrian was a sad sap that killed its own godly parent and a few more, receiving eternal punishment for that. Well, it wasn't that eternal - they did move to where Adrestia is now, but when the ancestors of those we call adrestians now arrived, they forced most of us back into our frigid homeland, like some sort of pest. Theoretically, we're all adrestian, even though Adrestia isn't much of a place in the creation myth to begin with - it's just their governed by those without prejudice, which was why the let the murderer reside in their land in the first place and even gave them an opportunity to continue the bloodline of old."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "Might be. But I don't care.", Richard answered. He was stubborn and he wanted to go back to Adrestia, for revenge, even if that sounded dumb. He'd die, he knew as much, Nayantai also knew as much, but he'd probably try to die first by protecting Richard. That was actuall nothing the blonde wanted, he didn't want another death, but Nayantai was probably glad when it happened. In the end they both were the same and they both died back there with the rest of their family. Yujin wouldn't understand that and thus Richard would never tell him what it meant when he said he'd go back to Adrestia. He wouldn't return, not because he hated Silesse and had no business here anyway, but because he wouldn't be able to when he lay in a grave. "My family was never strict amongst themselves, I could call my fathers whatever I wanted, I never needed to be formal. Aren't Thrians supposed to be free and stuff? How come you're all so stuck up here?", Richard asked. In Adrestia many just called their parents father and mother, which was the polite way to do, but Nayantai and Rain didn't care about all of that, they also didn't care much about titles, they only did in front of others, because they needed to maintain a certain image. What Yujin said next however made Richard grit his teeth. "You're right you don't know him.", Richard growled and didn't even shoot Yujin a glance. "Why are you taking his side then?" Sitting around here solved nothing and Nayantai wasn't even home most of the time and left Richard by himself, even when he was sick and a sick Yujin was crashing in his bed too. Just like he left him alone back then. If he hadn't, maybe all of them would still be...

      "You barged in my room in the middle of the night. I don't even know what you wanted.", Richard explained still pissed about the whole situation and the topic beforehand. Actually, why didn't he just go outside? Alone? Why did he let Yujin touch him still? "What's that supposed to mean?", Richard suddenly asked. Pent up? He wasn't desperate! "You're calling me desperate, yet you are the one picking a blowjob for your reward.", Richard retaliated and this whole situation, talking in general was starting to piss him off. At least he let go of him and Richard had the opportunity to bury his face in the fur underneath him, instead of facing Yujin. "I meant because Adrestia isn't frigid and harsh. He could have survived there I guess. Why didn't his mother just lead him there, instead of building something?" Richard made a short break and sighed. "Forget it. Myths make no sense anyway. I just wanted a story, I got one. That's that." He had enough anyway. He just wanted some silence and swallow down his feelings.
    • “Are you always like that? I’ll ask if you don’t care when you’re breaking your first bone out here”, the wolf sighed. Richard was a though nut to crack, he’d give him that, but even the worst of them eventually burst open under a lot of pressure - and it wasn’t like he didn’t remember the distinct feeling of wet fabric clinging to his chest at at least one occasion, but he’d not chalk that up right now or mention it in front of the blonde. “Because my father is a maniac and my other one is just lenient. Sometimes it’s kind of hard to get a right grip on what you can do with who - Muhan is easier to deal with, but then again, maybe it’s because of his upbringing. Or because father wants to show everyone how perfect his family is, what do I know. Traditions are traditions, even if they’re trash.” Honor was one thing that thrians valued, even if Daein’s entire population decided that the best way to dispose of their own was to eat them and the best possible way to fight sheep was to tear flesh from bone and ingest … what even, raw sheep meat? No wonder people said that wolves were the devil’s children, after all, the only saw those at the border that made do by filling their empty stomachs with what their gods gave them - sheep in that case. “Shitty phrasing? I’m just saying you both are tired and should rest, not be angry at each other.”

      The wolf sighed, he knew that the topic would turn sore eventually, especially when he just hit a spot like that - when he pissed the blonde off as quickly as that. “I barged in there and didn’t even tell you what I wanted? Yeah, right. Next you’re going to tell me I crawled in through your window.” Wasn’t that exactly what had happened? His head hurt quite a bit, as if it was trying to make sense of the ridiculous nature of the things that were happening, but there were bits and parts missing so it was harsh enough to even try. “You never jerked off or what? I can’t just always bring oil to your place, someones going to question it at some point!”, Yujin complained and even though Richard wasn’t giving him much attention by now, he didn’t quite care. Was he pissed? Definitely, but it didn’t matter much - the wolf had fucked up, but that was fine, in a way. “You didn’t object when I proposed it! And I haven’t even gotten one yet! Who’s the bad dog now?” Preposterous, wasn’t it? Richard was all sorts of mean to him for all the wrong reasons, but he kind of enjoyed that, too - at least to a certain level, but for now that was fine, too. Yujin moved himself too - if he wanted to massage Richards back, he might as well sit somewhere comfortably a - even if that meant he’d sit on the blondes ass, at least he tried to not put his full weight on him as he kneaded his back. The fabric was in the way, wasn’t it? “Anything else you want to hear? The creation myth is kind of stupid and boring, but that reminds me, I wanted to do something earlier”, the wolf concluded and then put his hands on the side of Richards ribcage and tried tickling him instead - that ought to work some wonders.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • "I won't.", Richard replied. Well maybe he would, he wasn't sure how it would go if he fought Nayantai. He wasn't sure if he'd hurt him in the first place, but if he set his mind to it, he was still scary and strong, right? Even more reason for him to get back to Adrestia and reclaim his husbands land or at least kill those who killed most of his family. Why Silesse of all places? He could have gone to Richards aunt, but he didn't. Why not? Was he really so scared of the people in Adrestia? That was pathetic. "You're always preaching about being free, about going where you want, marrying where you want and then you pull out tradition after tradition which basically are just a bunch of rules. It feels like people in Adrestia are more free than Thrians.", Richard replied. Sure, who they married was not so easy as to say whoever one loved, but then again, you could, if you wanted to. His father didn't officially marry Nayantai, but everyone kind of knew what was going on and he never married a woman. Usually a child, especially a noble one would need parents that are actually married, but his father threw that out the window. He made him a bastard son and a half wolf. No wonder someone wanted to see him dead... In the eyes of the typical Adrestian he wasn't worth much, was he now? "While we rest someone else is strengthening his power in Adrestia and it will just get harder to do anything about it.", he concluded.

      "You knocked on my window. When I opened, you just crawled in and argued that I'd want you there anyway, because I couldn't sleep. I dragged you out the way you came in, by your hair, until you climbed out yourself and left.", Richard told Yujin who again couldn't remember shit. How would he even 'tame' him, when he forgot everything he was taught anyway? "Why would I need oil for that?", Richard asked grumbling, but no he didn't. He wasn't up for that when he lay in his bed and saw the faces of the dead looming over him. That wasn't exactly romantic and it didn't turn him on. "You would have gotten it, but you told me you rather wanted me close.", Richard reminded Yujin, but right now he could forget asking. Richard wasn't in the mood. Richard buried his face even more and he heard Yujin move too. Eventually he felt some weight on him as Yujin sat down above Richard to have better access to his back. This felt nice and maybe if he concentrated on Yujins hands, he could forget everything else that hammered against his skull. "No, I-" Richard flinched when he felt Yujins fingers pressing against his sides and reached backwards to at least catch one hand. "Stop that!", he demanded. It didn't even tickle, it was just annoying. "This was supposed to be relaxing. I guess you ruined that. It would be only fair if I get my reward back now!"
    • Not breaking limbs out here sounded impossible, especially when one didn’t even know what on earth it was that they’d do with all their newfound, almost ironic free time. What was the next best thing that Richard would come up with anyway? Going out here alone because Yujin couldn’t make it for whatever reason? That sounded almost as stupid as it could get, then again it was nothing he’d put past Richard of all people anyway. “It just applies to Silesse and the ruling family. Also, they aren’t rules, it’s much more a matter of respect, even though some of them are so incredibly outdated, it hurts to think about all of it”, he informed Richard, but didn’t see much wrong with it. There was no reason to prod more at the blonde, to open up psychological wounds with some taunting - Yujin could save that for another day. “Who knows, maybe it’s different in other parts of Thria, but calling your parents by their first name in their presence is just seen as incredibly rude and it feels odd, but not for you, I guess.” That wasn’t mean to insinuate that the blonde had no manners, yet it somehow came across exactly like that, didn’t it? Whatever, he’d already spoiled the mood and crying over spoiled milk wasn’t going to fix anything either way - it was odd just to think about that. “Then beat your fathers ass already.”

      What would happen after that? Richard was going to go home, reclaim his throne and that was the last that Yujin would ever see of him, at least from out here. There was no reason for him to leave Silesse or even Thria and once the blonde became king, as he rightfully should, the wolf would just be an afterthought - Yujin grumbled, he didn’t like that for whatever reason. “Wow, I’m pretty bold sometimes. Well, would you not want me there? I can bring booze and something to smoke the next time. Or try to wake you up before your dreams turn into nightmares.” Almost, as if Richard was defenseless, once he offered him up to sleep, it did sound like that, didn’t it? Not only that, it also seemed as if they needed heaps of trial and error in all kinds of areas if he were honest. “Dunno, feels better?”, the wolf said, as innocently as he could and for a second, he thought about it. Did it really feel better? He didn’t even know. “So now its my own fault? Well, it did feel good, but spit still isn’t a good substitute.” Why was he complaining anyway? He got off, it had felt good enough to wipe out any other intrusive thought and that had been it - he didn’t need anything else, except Richard that was. And just like that, he stopped his assault when the blonde grabbed his hand. “Fine, I’ll go back to massaging you. Free of charge. What do you even want as a replacement for your reward, then? Pull me out of the tent by my hair?”, the wolf wanted to know, but he pulled his hand out of Richards grasp and started massaging his back, shoving the hand aside. He could still do this and apparently it couldn’t feel that bad.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • A broken leg would be bad. It would keep him from his training that he so desperately needed. He was still out of form, because he spent so much time in bed, or rather just lying down somewhere, wherever Nayantai dragged him. He didn't do one step from Myriad to Silesse himself and it showed. He still felt weak and the scar on his neck felt odd. Sometimes it made his neck more stiff, sometimes he feared the flesh would just rip open because of too much strain all on its own. "My parents respected me by giving me the choice how to call them.", Richard simply mumbled, they always respected each other. Now it felt like Nayantai didn't even care what happened to the kings legacy, or to the dead bodies of his children. "I think I never heard Nayantai calling my grandfather dad, father, or something else. He always called him by name too.", Richard informed Yujin. "My father called his mostly by 'father', though my grandpa always insisted on dad, or paps, or papa, something informal." It has always been Rikiya, not my dad, or my father, nothing like that. Maybe Nayantai had also been angry at his father? "How come that is something you remember?", Richard sighed. "Fine. I will. Maybe even right when we come back!" He wasn't ready, he knew that. Actually he wanted to wait until after his birthday and maybe he could use that hunt to test himself.

      "No thanks. I'm not into such visits...", Richard grumbled. He'd rather have Yujin make an appointment. At night especially, he often enough didn't feel up for company. Sometimes he tried to sleep some more, sometimes he went out of his room to drink a cup of tea, only to notice that Nayantai couldn't sleep as well. Then they drank together without talking. "I don't need it.", Richard insisted, he didn't want that stuff in his room, he wouldn't use it anyway. "Yeah it's your own fault.", Richard grumbled and kind of got even more upset when Yujin acted like last night wasn't quite so good after all. Didn't he say something completely different before? Whatever, Richard didn't care! Once Yujin was done with messing around, Richard buried his face in the fur again. He felt like shit right now and he didn't even know exactly why. He was fine just minutes ago and now he felt like he wanted to hide from the world. Yujin included. "I don't know...", he whined into the fur, having it swallow up most of it. Why was he even out here with Yujin, when he could use his time to train too? Richard grabbed some fur with his hands and clenched his fists.

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 1 mal editiert, zuletzt von Earinor ()

    • There were a plethora of things to upset Richard with and it almost always felt as if Yujin was pushing one right button and then a hundred of wrong ones, all of which never worked in his favor. Why was it so hard to be a good friend? Was it even his own fault or did all of this only happen because it had to, because there was nothing else there could be done about any of this and that was the bitter aftertaste of it all, it was almost incredibly tangy, too. Was he choked up about something like this? No, Richard seemingly just was in a shitty mood for now and that was about it, nothing that Yujin couldn’t fix, he was trying since day one anyway, didn’t he? “And mine gave me the choice of calling them father or being without honor or manners. I don’t mind, it just shows how different we are in the end”, Yujin elaborated, but maybe Richard wasn’t wrong, his life sounded quite carefree or rather free in general - at least up until now. “Sounds like they were quite different. Who knows, maybe Nayantai never called the former king by father to begin with. But then again, I don’t know them. Neither of your fathers or their families.” Did the late king of Thria even have any? He just appeared one day, once Adrestia had declared war, apparently and he was here to stay when he married the, by now long-deceased, queen.

      “As if, you should focus on training! And also, I only remember important stuff, I’m a good dog after all!” Hardly the truth, but if it furthered his understanding of the situation in some shape, way or form, Yujin was more than happy to comply to it and have a go at it all. But why even? Because Richard couldn’t go home without beating his dad in a fair fight? How lame and on top of that, it sounded incredibly cheesy too. “Fine, fine. I won’t bring you anything anymore and if I want to come over, I’ll send a messenger crow in advance.”, he sighed and continued kneading. The fabric was still in the way, but Yujin did his best and Richard seemingly was able to relax as well, which made it sound as if the blonde had only waited for someone that knew … something about all of this. However, the wolf prince could only crack bones back in place, not fix exhausted muscles - not for long at least. “It’s your fault for not training me better”, he insisted all of a sudden, knowing fully well that no matter what, it wouldn’t matter much - it was his own fault and the dog-excuse would only let Richard win, too. Fuck. “Mh, you don’t? Again?”, he reiterated and let his hands wander a bit, massaging different spots and not particularly just Richards back for now. “Should I keep talking? Or do you want some silence? If you don’t know, I’d be happy to give you time to figure it out. Actually, think you could take off your clothes? The ones on your upper body, you just need to slide out of them - massaging would work better that way.”
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.
    • Richard didn't care if he was rude or polite, especially not concerning some random people he had never met before and that weren't his family, nor his people. He didn't belong here, that was clear. In all of Silesse and even possibly in all of Thria, he was the only blonde person, that he wasn't a full blown wolf was perfectly clear to anyone looking at him for only a second. He didn't intend to fit in here either, because he wasn't here to stay. He'd do that hunt, maybe, because it was a proof of strength and because Dayan would have pestered him to do it anyway, but he didn't intend to mengle with the people, to make friends with the townsfolk or to please Yujins parents, the rulers of Silesse. Nayantai was kind of the same, he was lucky he knew them, but that was about all. He ever went near town if he didn't have to either. "We didn't see Kyojin a whole lot, but I think even she called him Rikiya.", Richard let out with a sigh and most of it was swallowed by the fur again. If he could have he would have stopped existing right here and now.

      "Nayantai is old. And blind on one side. I will beat him soon enough.", Richard answered. If he played it right he could. Somehow. Nayantai sat on his ass most of his time in Adrestia too, Richard probably got more exercise most of the time and he was still young. "Good then.", Richard simply said. He doubted Yujin had a crow he could send over, but in the end Richard was fine without him too. Even these trips didn't help him to forget for too long. Well it almost did two whole days and Yujin had been the one upset and whiny all the time, but there was a limit to everything. At some point Yujin always managed to fuck it up. At least Richard warmed up a bit and he could concentrate on the feeling on his back. Maybe he could simply fall asleep like that to escape reality, but then he'd surely have a nightmare. "I could train you by refusing your reward, because you have been such a bad boy.", Richard answered. "And no I don't. I'll tll you if I come up with something." Did he want him to talk? Richard wasn't sure what he wanted right now, but after some initial confusion, he wrestled himself out of the upper part of his clothes, which hadn't been easy considering he didn't want to sit up for it. Now that his upper body - except his neck - was exposed, the fur underneath him tickled a little and when Yujin didn't have his hands on Richards back, he immediately grew cold. "I don't know what I want...", he mumbled.