bloodbound. (earinor & akira)

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    • Whatever he'd expected, it wasn't this, Yujin didn't think it would be as soft and tender as it was, as loving as it sounded and it made him wonder if that was, what they'd both hidden from one another for long enough. Yujin disliked questioning things, especially if they were like this, but it did make the wolf wonder if he could have more of what Richard offered him, if he could ask for so much more than this and if yes, if he'd get something out of it or if it all would culminate in something that he didn't quite understand just yet. However, not only that, he did wonder if happiness only came in as many shapes and forms as one could perceive or if this was a good substituce for another, if he could just come and ask for something like this whenever he wanted or if it all was for naught because in the end, Richard would do wht he wanted and Yujin was the one that felt lost and lonely in so many aspects of life. "I don't have one", was his only viable rebuttal and the only reason he could muster to even think some more about it was, that none of this mind-numbing enough, but that was a lie, if they went as slow as now at some other point and strayed from being too messy, he wondered if all of this would - in turn - fix some of his own, but also some of Richards problems.

      "So do I, no moving it is, then", he concluded for the two of them and he wondered why. Normally, he'd be asking for more than anyone would be willing to give him and he'd be questioning what it meant to not have any of that, but then again, he was sane enough to leave those questions out, to stop thinking like that for a minute and to just spend his time with being happy about what he got. There were traces of other things still hanging in the air and being under all this fur made it hard to breathe, but Yujin would be the last person to complain, in fact, he liked it this way, he couldn't complain and the obvious preset was, that he couldn't help but bite his bottom lip at some point. "Me?" He was good at something? That was news, but he couldn't help it, he was just touching and feeling up the blonde, not going slow, but he dug his heels against the fabric beneath once Richard picked up the pace, and all the grip on reality that the wolf had before slowly muddled up and became unreadable. "Says you ... of all ... ngh!", Yujin forced out of his throat, biting back a moan for the first time that night, only to wonder why he muffled his sounds to begin with. Nobody could hear them out here, it was just the two of them and this wasn't some sort of competition, this was soft and sweet and nothing could deter them from what they were doing, so why exactly? "Don't ... stop ..."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • Richard lay there, his head pressed against Yujins shoulder and he felt good. It was warm despite being out in the dead of the night in Silesse, with the temperatures dropping dangerously low even for wolves sometimes, but in here it was fine, Yujin had enough warmth for the two of them and beneath all that fabric that kept the warm air in and the cold air out, it was almost getting hot. Richard closed his eyes and just enjoyed the embrace, the closeness and the shivers running trough his body. He panted slightly, this was relaxing and sweet and it still managed to keep their minds occupied. There was no need to think about anything else but their skin touching. Richard wanted to get even closer, he didn't want to let go of Yujin and he was glad he dragged him out here, even though their night could have been better. Right now, it couldn't though and this was making up for their struggles before, for Yujins fear of the vastness outside and the dead haunting Richard. They'd be tired the next day probably, but that would be fine too, right now Richard didn't want to trade this moment for anything else.

      The feeling got better yet almost unbearing, at the same time it was calming Richard down and let him think about nothing else. His hip subconsciously was moving to their rhythm, his breath went shallow and small, soft and almost subtle moans left his throat. Sometimes it felt so good he started to forget to move his own hands, but he remembered himself to not exclude Yujin from the fun. "Yeah... you...", Richard mumbled and finished his sentence with another soft groan. Sex with Yujin was always nice, he generally was good at it and he managed to make Richard feel good amongst all the pain crushing him too. He needed this to recuperate, but in the end, this time, he didn't even only to this for himself, he did it to make Yujin forget his fear, to let him relax at least for a portion of the night. Richard did this for him more than he did it for himself for a change, because all the other times that wasn't the case. "I won't...", Richard assured Yujin. Why would he stop? Why would he not try to give Yujin all he wanted, but what was that anyway? Well, this seemed just fine and thus Richard continued. He himself felt something building up inside him, something making his cheeks flare up and something forcing him to lose his grip on reality with every stroke. It was getting harder for him to maintain a steady rhythm.

    • Yujin got himself into this out of his own free will, he knew that, Richard knew that and he liked spending time with the blonde, no doubt about it. However, the wolf also knew that it all was futile and in the end, he'd find himself wondering and asking about so many things that he wasn't even sure what he wanted in the first place - was all of this in vain or was it better if he, of all people, just surrendered himself to the blonde and pretended that he didn't need this, despite literally begging for it? This was absurd, especially when his body was reacting like that and when a hand and one more finger were enough to make him feel as if there was nothing else in this world that he needed. Maybe it was foolish, he didn't know, yet he couldn't even guess and the sole reason for that was, that he couldn't fathom what it meant to be someone he definitely wasn't. His body got tense under all those touches, the warmth got to his head and Yujin was left wondering why it did, why he didn't reach for more and rather just accepted all that he got at face value, but maybe that was because there wasn't much else he could ask for, not when he was with Richard, who wound up forcing noises out of his throat that he hadn't made in a good while. The blonde was the key to everything, wasn't he?

      His own hand wasn't exactly moving the way Yujin wanted it to, but he made do, stopped himself from stopping all the time and giving the blonde something back from all the pleasure he was receiving - it was only fair if the two of them hit a breaking point together, not seperate from one another and it served as a reminder that not only was he a people pleaser, he also wanted to desperately have Richard like him for all that it was worth and spend all the time he could with him. "I'm glad", Yujin expressed, but he wasn't the only one that did all this work, Richard was there to and he - quite frankly - was doing way better than him, at least the wolf believed that. "You are ... even ... better", he commented, but there still was this grin on his face and the warmth that spread throughout his entire body, yet, the areas that the blonde was touching felt the most sensitive, almost as if they were burning and as if the rhythm they'd picked out was a bit too much for their tired minds, for the two of them that weren't able to sleep, or maybe Yujin was just terribly oversensitive. "Richard, I--", he suddenly muttered, moaning once more - Yujin wasn't completely done for just yet, but he didn't need much longer. "Please", he begged eventually.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • This was nice and sweet and tender and everything Richard didn't find anywhere else in his life at the moment. He felt good cuddled up like that, under warm fabric and fur, in a small tent that barely had enough room for the two of them. He felt good to listen to Yujins breathing, to feel some of his warm breath brush against his own skin. Every touch felt warm, almost hot, his whole body was smoldering, his muscles twitching and turning under his skin. Yujins as well, he felt him squirm and enjoy this loving moment that showed him so much of Richard he though he'd lost somewhere in Adrestia. He was still himself somehow, he was still a young man that tried to fit in a certain role, that wanted others to feel good around him and that preferred a sweet night over one full of lust at least sometimes. He wasn't all that angry and mad, not when he was with Yujin, even outside the tent on the journey and during the hunt. He felt good, because he felt more like himself again and he thanked Yujin for it by making him feel good too, at least that was the plan.

      Richard slightly shook his head, but didn't say anything more, he couldn't be that good for doing what he did now for the first time really. Especially sober. Either way, as long as Yujin was happy it didn't matter and Richard snuggled up a little bit more. He let out every moan that swelled up inside him and he listened to Yujins as well, he liked hearing his voice shake like that. The blonde listened up when he heard his name and he nodded after he understood. "Mhm...", he let out and just slightly shifted his position to get a better grip. First he actually went just a bit slower so he himself could catch up. When he felt his muscles tense up and his stomach tingle, he set his mind to answer Yujins plea as well. He didn't care about ruining the tent and whatever fabric was closest to them, they could maybe wash some of it tomorrow, who knew, it didn't matter. Instead his hands moved faster and it took a lot of concentration to not just abandon what he was doing to completely dwell in the feelings rising up in himself. His moaning grew louder and so did Yujin and when the body under his touch finally started trembling and twitching, his own was too. For a second there he felt like seeing sparks before his eyes, but he didn't allow himself to drift apart completely. Instead he kept going until he too felt something warm and sticky on his hand.

    • Yujin hadn't felt as welcome as this in somebodies arms ever, it all was odd to begin with, indescribably odd and it made him wonder why he hadn't sought out somebody like Richard earlier, why he relied on the wolves and their useless wisdom, their way of doing things when sheep hat something much better, much gentler to offer in the first place. What on earth was this? Had Richard put some spell onto him, had he gone soft in a personality sense or were all of his senses and his theories just jumbled garbage to begin with? The wolf had no clue, yet he squirmed under the touch of a sheep, let his mouth do what it wanted, inched closer, then shyed away, as if he didn't know what he wanted - all of this was stupid, wasn't it? But not only that, his hair was standing on end and every small movement was letting him jolt back up, as if he was close to the edge, an edge that nobody was pushing him off just now and it amde him wonder why that was, why he couldn't just do wht he wanted, do as he ought to, but that might have been because Richard was the one who, in the end, took care of him and the rest, as much as he was supposed to take care of the blonde.

      His movements stopped, then picked back up again and they both seemingly were losing themselves in pleasure - Yujin was trying his earnest, as if there were no words to describe how sorry he'd be if Richard didn't get to finish, too, but once his own body started trembling and squirming, more than it already had and when the hastiest of touches felt like it was the most sloppy, loving and reaffirming thing, he soon found that both of them where occupied with pushing the other over the edge. Exasperated, Yujin gasped for air eventually and let one last moan escape his mouth, let the waves of pleasure crash in over him and found himself losing it, more than he should - and Richard ended up doing so as well, ruining not only his hand but both of their stomachs, too. In the end, he needed a good minute, gasped for air and wanted nothing more than to turn over and rest, to let his body finally figure itself out and assess what he'd just had done, what had just happened, but there was nothing except a small smile on those lips of his as he wiped his hands off on some fur before gently wrapping his arms around Richards back and forcing him downward, all the way onto him. "That ... was unbelievably good."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • Richard was panting and wheezing still and he needed some air after this. His body tingled and felt heavy, maybe a good nights sleep would be possible after all, just until the sun came up, whenever that was. The blonde felt Yujins arms that wrapped themselves around him and softly forced him down, which wasn't all too hard, because his body wanted some rest anyway. He ended up partly lying ontop of Yujin, held close in his embrace. Richard tried to not get everything dirty, also not Yujin and he found some distant spot to wipe his hands. Then he tried to find a good spot for his own hands. One just ended up softly grabbing Yujins shoulder. He was still so very warm, though right now Richard body was too. Still he liked being close to him, to hug him and feel his skin on his own. Richard closed his eyes. "It was nice... yes.", he agreed, after all he was tired now and he forgot what made him wake up in the first place, it was pushed backwards at the very end of his brain, unimportantly sitting there. There was no need to try and recall it. Yujin seemed like he was feeling better too.

      Richard reached out with one hand though, to make a little hole in all the fabric, so they'd get some fresh air, or at least air from inside the tent and not from under all that fabric, where it was damp and hot. One little hole to get some air in was enough though, he didn't remove the blankets, the fur and the clothes completely. The cold and fresher air was welcome though, but Richard also rather remained inside the warmth under the fur, instead of freezing to death out there. He didn't want to dress up for that either, not now. He had been sweating before, but he also was now and so was Yujin probably. Richard didn't mind that right now, but it would be a pain to wah whatever they got dirty with the degrees out there. Usually he'd just jump into a creak and dunk the fabric in there too to leave it to dry afterwards, but in Thria that was hardly possible. Everything that got wet would just freeze, so if they truly wanted to wash something, they needed to do that next night, when they had a fire to dry their things. And as for his body? He'd probably be freezing too, but he knew he was able to survive it, after all he did fall into the sea and survived.

    • Air, he needed air in his lungs, needed to breathe for a second - Yujin was never good at these things, never good at keeping his calm and not chasing for more than he had bargained for. With Richard, however, all of this turned out to be so different from the usual - none of this was supposed to feel the way it did, as accomplishing as it did, but he sure as hell felt good, better than he imagined that he could and now he was a panting mess, in need of a good nights sleep - and he knew that. Whatever it was that he tried, it didn't work usually, he knew as much, especially when he was out here alone, but all of that didn't even come to mind right now - the blonde that lay there, atop of him, felt as if he could make him see stars again, anytime he wanted, with just a few touches and the wolf knew that he should cherish this, not deny that he liked it, but rather be happy that it had happened in the first place. "Mhm", he agreed as he forced the slightly smaller - but definitely not slimmer - figure against him, trying to leave no room for the cold air that Richard allowed in - they were going to huddle up together, just like this and enjoy this endless, pitchblack night for once, now that their bodies seemed to be actually worn and exhausted. "Good night", he whispered eventually, pressing a kiss onto the blondes forehead and dozing off at some point after he closed his eyes.

      Yujins dreams were pleasant, they were void of anything, there wasn't much to think about and even when something appeared, it was nothing threatening, just ... did he dream of Richard? It seemed that way, especially when those blonde locks and deer-brown eyes came to mind, when he had to think about that one person that he actually spent his time with without any complaints. Still, he eventually found himself feeling somewhat cold, for no reason at all - whatever it was, he couldn't say, but his eyes fluttered open when it got too much - his leg felt like an icicle, which partly was because he had stuck it out from under all of that fur and there still was someone that slept, apparently rather soundly, right then and there. A soft chuckle escaped his dry lips - he was thirsty and he still needed to clean up, Yujin knew that, now that he realized that this wasn't the shabby hut or a palace made of ice. Instead, this was the wilderness around Silesses borders and that also meant ... his stomach felt tight, all of a sudden. But why? Because he still feared his dad? Or the fact that he'd get Richard hurt and in trouble? He'd slept so well and now he was agonizing over the same shit. "Arikins", the wolf mumbled as he grabbed the blondes shoulder, shaking him slightly and softly. "It's time to get up, it's already light outside", he informed him, but as if to prove it, he forced his cold leg back under all the fur and forced it between Richards own ... he was so nice and warm.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • It was nice to lie here with Yujin, Richard didn't feel cold anymore, but instead he felt tired. Sleeping a few more hours would be good for both of them, since tomorrow they had a big day ahead, traveling further and out of Silesse. They'd had to try and avoid Shurens traps, which was a weird thing to say, but they'd manage and when they arrived somewhere, they'd see what they'd do next. Not everything needed a plan, Dayan had never planned anything and it always worked out just fine. Richard thought about the whole situation though, not just about what they just did and how they cuddled up together, but also the things leading up to this. He didn't want to get close to Yujin and he also didn't want Yujin to get close to him, but it somehow happened, no matter what they talked about. When they did it already had been too late, hadn't it? And now they were out here together and Richard wasn't sure what to call their relationship anymore and how hard it would be to leave eventually. For Yujin it would be hard too probably, but he'd forget at some point and thus he didn't need to worry, right? While thinking about all those things and lying on top of Yujin, hugged, he eventually fell asleep though.

      Richard was a light sleeper, at least lately and when he heard his name and got shook he opened up his eyes. It was still rather dark in here, since they were still buried in fabric and fur but there was some light shining through an opening, so he was right. The leg suddenly pushed between his own was surprising however and Richard gasped. "Ah! Do you want my balls to fall off?", he asked since Yujins leg was unbelievably cold, where did he have that? Richard raised his head and rubbed his eyes a little. When Yujins leg was this cold already, what about going outside there and even washing himself? Both of them were a little sticky from yesterday and he didn't want to get in his clothes like that. Should they make a fire now too? Probably not, but breakfast would be nice. "So what's the plan? A quick wash with snow, dressing up, packing our things and eating on our horses backs?", he asked, after all they head a long way ahead and Yujin emphasized that he didn't want to go back.

    • Richard was so different from any encounter Yujin had before, not just in terms of looks and personality - it was hard to put into words and yet, it was stupid to even think about. This was a one time thing, that was something that he tried to tell himself, but he made a fool out of himself at best and he couldn’t help but chuckle when the blonde suddenly seemed wide awake - not because of a stupid nightmare for once, but because there was a cold leg between his own. The two of them were bound to have fun somehow, and even if there was no fun to be had, Yujin was trying to make some - it would backfire at some point, but right about now it seemed to be just fine as it was. “Do you still need them?”, he asked, daring, but then he just giggled, barely audible. “It wasn’t my intention, but my legs cold and I thought that, since yours are all nice and warm, I’d get to warm it up?” Thankfully, this didn’t sour the mood, but it felt as if something had shifted anyway - as if Richards mind was sticking to him instead of all those gruesome topics that usually haunted him. Yujin was glad, at least for once, as he looked for a sorry excuse to stay where they were, but there hardly was any - and he didn’t feel like wasting their day, either.

      In the end, they now lay there and the wolf couldn’t help but grin at the blonde - at the person that was keeping him company in these dire times - and wonder if this was meant to he or if there was nothing going on, nothing much at all. “Hmm”, he eventually mused, inching a bit closer to Richard and forcing their grossly, sticky bodies a bit further together - shit, they really needed a good scrub or at least something, didn’t they? But then again, they’d have to either heat up water out here or find some sort of water source that wouldn’t immediately cause Richard to become a fucking icicle. “That does sound like a plan, but we do have to get up for that”, he chuckled, before leaning over and pressing a kiss to Richards forehead - and before rubbing that cold leg of his against Richards warm ones - this felt nice. But they still didn’t need to waste time, now that they were awake, and yet … “Mh, do we really have to get up immediately though?” What was he, a whining little kid? Well, he did sound like one right about now.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "I'd like to keep them.", Richard replied grumbling, but he also let Yujin do what he wanted for now. How did his leg get that cold in the first place, had he been going outside? But the rest of him was reasonably warm. Richard wasn't sure if he wanted to crawl out of their little cave in the cold, he'd probably regret it and freeze, but he also needed to wash up a little bit and thus he couldn't just dress up right now where it was warm, right? Silesse was a pain in the ass, Richard didn't die in the cold and he could bare it, but after so many weeks he got pretty sick of it, he wanted to go back home, where it was warm and green. Even Fhaergus had warmer days. Richard looked at Yujins grinning face, he seemed to like this situation quite a bit and apparently he was able to sleep too after all. What would he say to some warmer weather? He'd probably complain... Nayantai never liked the weather in Myriad either, in summer he barely moved if he didn't need to, even if Dayan and Richard annoyed him and crawled all over him to get him to actually chase them around. Though it wasn't that hot in the long halls of the castle.

      Eventually Richards cheeks turned a little bit red and he flinched when Yujin moved even closer. "So?", he asked after Yujin pointed out they'd need to get up. They had somewhere to go, right? Now Yujin however wanted to stay in this tent a while longer as it seemed. Richard got a kiss and even more red cheeks when he felt Yujin move, gods damn it, why was he so sensitive? Well he did just wake up after all and he swallowed down a short noise that wanted to escape his throat. "Didn't we want to be fast in case someone is searching for us to drag you back home?", Richard asked. Shuren didn't want him to go anywhere near there anyway, right? Richard wasn't even sure if his traps were there to keep people out or to keep Yujin in. Either way, they'd navigate through them eventually, if they took it slow it would work out, but in order to do that, they'd probably need to go fast now, to reach the border without anyone following them. A fight wasn't going to solve things, after all they wanted to go back eventually and whoever might be running after them, they were not their enemies, not truly.

    • "You have the balls to say no to an offer like that? Well, I'll be damned.", Yujin replied, almost joking, but then shaking his head and probably getting that curtain of black hair all over him and the blonde. What was Richards obsession with untying that hairdo of his every single time they slipped into bed? Was he just convinced that no matter what he tried, the wolf would let him do what he wanted? That seemed highly unlikely and yet, it made him feel kind of giddy and warm on the inside - he did like being here, liked basking in the blondes presence and liked being who he was when everything in his proximity seemed to have an almost uncanny resemblance to the guy that he liked to spend more than one and the same night with, over and over and over again, until both of them would realize, at some point, that this wasn't going to cut it and that no matter what, all their attempts were futile ones, tryhard at peace-making and more than the work of two stubborn idiots that, for the life of themselves, couldn't help one another with anything. “So you don’t want to get up either and spend the day huddled together in a mountain of fur? Sounds like a nice way to spend the day, thank you for the suggestion.”, Yujin mused and gifted Richard another smile - this was going better than usual, right?

      Not only that, though - nobody would see them out here and the bitter, almost tragic reality was that they should be getting up and going before anyone could get too close to them and drag them home. “Mhm, I know, but it’s only been half a day and a few odd hours of nighttime that we’ve been out here, there’s no need to rush, right?”, the wolf asked, wrapping his hands anf arms around Richards waist and pulling him closer, almost discomfortingly so, but they still were in their right mind so this wasn’t too bad, was it now? His hands rested above Richards ass, he didn’t dare touch it and instead Yujin hoped that he’d get verbal or physical affirmation for it and he’d be happy already. “Even if they do find us, it’s half bad, I know how to bribe them … or at least I can try to. But there’s something else.” An unheard clarification - Yujin was trying his utmost to not make this sound incredibly silly and actually spice it up, even if their barren skin was already inadvertently and inappropriately touching the others, just in case. “How about we have some fun first? Or is that off the limits?” Morning sex wasn’t that anyone had to be ashamed of or be embarrassed about, instead; he wanted nothing more than the two of them having fun, which was why he put a random piece of fabric he could find above their heads, just because this was nicer, right? Right? All of his was nice and not desperate. Absolutely not. Soon, his lips lay on those of the blonde and his hands wandered downward. “Unless you really want to get up?”
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "An offer to loose my balls? Why would I take that? If you want to assign roles it's definitely you that is the girl in this relationship.", Richard replied and soon was met with a wave of hair crushing over him. Yujins ridiculously long hair was everywhere as always and Richards had grown too in the last two months. He wasn't sure if he wanted to cut it, but he probably looked odd with short hair, he never had that and for now he could at least tie them together if they got in the way. Though he rarely did that despite every wolf always doing something with their hair for whatever reason. Well Nayantai didn't but he probably didn't count... he always had been very practible right? If it wasn't necessary why do it? He didn't care how he looked either. "When did I say that?", Richard suddenly asked. He wasn't wrestling himself free, but that didn't mean he wanted to waste his whole day in their little tent when they had other plans. The sun wasn't up or long out here anyway, so they probably should use the light they got.

      Richard suddenly was hugged tighter, he could barely move like that but he was still able to get some distance between their two heads to be able to look at Yujin who seemed hellbent on using their morning differently instead of getting up and getting dressed. "it's actually almost a whole day since we left.", Richard explained. Yujin visited him in the morning and it only took them maybe two hours for deciding what to do and eventually getting all they needed. "Something else?", he asked feeling Yujins arms and hands that kept away from his butt for now, but still were close as if Yujin was only waiting to move his fingers. "If it were so easy wouldn't your previous trips have gotten further?", Richard asked, he wasn't sure if Yujin was truly thinking he could send whoever came for them away or if he was just mincing words. Well if they saw the two of them naked like that, they'd probably go away again... ugh, Richard didn't want anyone to surprise them like that. "We're wasting all the sunlight and with all those traps you mentioned we can't travel at night.", Richard pointed out, but Yujin had other plans anyway, buried both of them again and kissed the blonde suddenly. His cheeks flared up a little bit and for whatever reason he kissed Yujin back. He felt the wolfs hands wander downwards and a shiver ran down his spine. He looked at Yujin when he stopped the kiss and started taunting him, at least Richard was sure that was his intention. As if he was sure that Richard couldn't say no to him if he just did the right things. "Are you stalling because you're still scared?", he bluntly asked instead of telling Yujin off, just in case. Yesterday Yujin couldn't even sleep, though he told Richard to not turn back, but maybe he changed his mind.

    • "Richard. I made a joke. It was ... right there. And went over your head. ... Also, I'm not the one that couldn't figure out how to fuck someone the first time around so you got fucked instead. If anything, you're the girl.", Yujin informed his fellow wolf and couldn't help himself - he was laughing like an idiot now, especially since the pun had been right there, basically in plain sight and Richard hadn't thought twice about it and instead, he went straight back to talking about facts and how cruel this world could be to begin with. "Never, but you did with a bit imagination, so I'd like to thank you for this sublime idea.", he added, as if he were to inform Richard of his very own idea. This was stupid, the blonde was right, they theoretically had places they wanted to be at but somehow, Yujin just didn't feel like getting up right now - instead, he rather took in the somewhat warm and yet freezing air in this tent, or the fact that Richard was so close to him, that there was no way in hell for them to just get up and get going without doing something about th fact that their bodies were a mess first and all in all, Yujin wasn't sure if the hands that had wandered from Richards back to his ass weren't just looking for a suitable excuse to be used. Why was that, though? The wolf seemingly couldn't sit still, that was that, but more than that, he couldn't quite tell what to make of it, if the squirming - as subtle as it was - and their bodies touching was an invitation of some sort or not.

      "What?", he suddenly spew, but Richard was right. Not only that, Yujin also had been fairly aware of that fact for a while now and oddly enough, he'd decided to avoid it for god knew how long, just because he could and because everything else was more important. Still, he wasn't going to let go of Richard that easily, not like this, and even when he had added something, it was nice to see - or feel - him crumble under the weight of a simple kiss and some hands that touched him and felt him up. "I'm an obedient idiot", he added, knowing that quarrelling was the last thing he wanted and needed right about now. Instead, he wanted nothing more than this - whatever this was - but it also dawned upon him that they, that he, was wasting precious time that they could use to get themselves near the border. Packing up would take a while and they would, most likely, spend another night of their lives out here, on their short and impromptu trip. "Eugh, fine, you're right", he sighed and was about to pull back, but he was kissed instead and all of that gave him a few things, among mixed signals. Now, the wolf prince was confused and just staring at Richard, or the faint outlines of his, that he could make out in this absolute darkness that existed under those furs. "No, I'm not scared. I said I wanted this, and I still do", he grumbled and then pulled the fur off of their heads, took his hands back to himself and sat up, stratched himself and crawled to the tents entrance, where he stuck his hand out, nothing more, and grabbed a fistful of snow that he pressed together. "Here", he suddenly declared, shoving one of those oddly shaped snowballs in Richards direction, before starting to clean himself up.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "A joke? Where? I still don't get it, you're really bad at this.", Richard answered grumbling and even when he thought it over again, he still couldn't figure out what Yujin meant. "I was drunk and high and at some point you need someone to explain to you what to do, at least if you want your... date... or whatever to have fun too!", Richard defended his own case and didn't know why Yujin was laughing in the first place right now. "You're clingy.", he stated as if it did help the discussion. Was Yujin even? He was hard to get rid of, but he didn't come by all the time just like Richard had asked him to. In the end he was the one dragging the wolf out here on a whim. "Just because you're imagining I said something doesn't make it true. I won't let you fantasize a reality you like.", Richard made clear with a light grumble. Live wasn't what one wished it to be. If it was nobody would have died, everyone Richard loved would still be here, his father, Atwick, Flora and of course Dayan, but they were dead. There was no use in wishing it differently, he was here now, with Yujin, running away from something, both of them and the wolfs hands were wondering and trying to subdue Richard into staying with him in this tent. He slightly shivered, but that was all.

      "We left before noon.", Richard elaborated once more and while Yujin still tried his best to make Richard stay he also saw the gears turning in his head. "So when they caught you you just went back home with them?", Richard asked, but Yujin didn't want to be out here, not on his own, right? Maybe the traps were't even a problem, maybe he wasn't able to move on because of those, but because he searched for an excuse to turn back. Some cuts, some blood, anything, because when he finally got as far as he wanted he actually just wanted to go back home. Richard knew he was right, if they wanted to get somewhere, they needed to get their asses moving. If Yujin wanted to cuddle so badly, they could also do that in the evening when it got dark and they couldn't go on anyway. Eventually Richard hit the nail on the head, even if Yujin complained it wasn't true. Suddenly he let go of him and almost fled to the tents entrance. Richard was cold without Yujin and with the tent opening up a little bit. He found himself with a ball of snow in his hand and sighed, but didn't comment on Yujins behaviour that was just proving Richard was right. The snow was cold and barely melting in Richards hand, he washed himself a little bit with it though, because that was better than nothing and there was a loot of bodily fluids he needed to get off his body. By the time he was finished, the snow was almost gone too and Richard reached for his clothes to try and put them on while sitting down, before crawling outside.

    • "If your balls are going to fall off, I doubt you'd have the balls for it ... that's some sheep saying, isn't it? Well, it isn't funny if I have to explain the joke, agh", he complained and if anything, he felt like a fool, as if he had been played by Richard and the blonde had definitely understood him, but Yujin was sure that he hadn't and that he actually was dumbfounded and clueless. "Just admit that you didn't know what to do because you never slept with a man before!" That was true and Yujin did chuckle ever so slightly while he rubbed his own body down with icy snow, wondering if Richard was going to take it - though, he wasn't one to talk, especially not after also getting sick when he crashed down into the waves and miraculously hadn't hit his head against one of the stray ice floes that had split off from what he called his home just earlier. "Aww, why not? It would be nice if I could just have you all to myself and there was nothing to worry about. A quiet day, no intoxication in sight, just pure and genuine feelings ... okay, fine. That's too much baggage", he summarized and shook his head, after which he reached for something, anything, to tie his hair up with - where the fuck had this pesky piece of fabric gone? Fuck, this wasn't a good way to wash himself and he sighed - just looking down and thinking about the fact that Richard had ... that he ... why was this embarrassing all of a sudden? Because the two of them had done it without any form of intoxication? Or was it because of the genuine feelings they somehow shared, yet didn't want to admit to?

      "You tortured me physically before noon. My lungs have never burned so bad and I grew up in the coldest place of ... what do you call it, Gaia?", he summarized and he wasn't wrong. Silesse was the coldest place there was, by far, but the further one wandered to the middle of the country, the warmer it got and once they found themselves homebound for Adrestia, the frigid temperatures climbed and climbed until they were more than bearable for a sheep and extremely unbearable for a wolf. "Sometimes. Other times I said I was going, if they let me go five more steps, and I had them walk into wires and traps. They trusted me twice on that, as far as I remember - once they did step in there, I booked it out of there and ran off." That was it, which also meant that he hadn't gone far to begin with, but at least he had gotten somewhere, stumbled through the snow and left a trail of blood behind when he had hurt himself, but those details weren't as important, not when he dressed up and poked his head out of the tent after Richard, unable to find a piece of fabric to tie that hair of his up, which was why he eventually went for a more foolproof method and tied it together with itself, which looked and felt odd and would most likely not even stay in place in the long run, it never had. But once he had crawled out of there, had taken a whiff of fresh air, he did drag some of the fur with him and dismantled the tent soon thereafter - they had to pack up. "Hm, so up north we go? Or do you want to take a piss first? Eat some snow before you do, maybe? I mean, we should drink something."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "That's a pretty bad joke.", Richard concluded, even after the explanation it wasn't very funny, even though he understood what Yujins intention had been. Maybe it was just Richard that didn't have a lot of things to laugh about in the first place. He had been different, but now that he lost everything, there wasn't much that lightened his mood anymore. The only thing that kept him occupied with something else was somehow being with Yujin, even though he was very annoying right now. "And how was it the first time you slept with a guy?", Richard asked instead of agreeing and admitting that he didn't have a clue and that he didn't want it to be awkward or bad. He also didn't admit that he kind of liked to be on the receiving end. "You're just being a scaredy-cat again. And what you're talking about is loaded with way too much feelings.", Richard pointed out, because he already told Yujin that he couldn't have a relationship right now, or actually ever. Whoever had the bad luck to fall for him was bound to be disappointed and at the worst case even hurt. Yujin seemed like being on the best way to have that happen.

      Richard found the fabric he usually wore around his neck and put it on, even though they hopefully wouldn't meet anyone out here. In this case right now he even brought a scarf too, because it was bound to get cold out here. "It's because you never exercise and I even let you off the hook before reaching the goal.", Richard said and he doubted that counted as torture. It was only good for Yujin if he worked out from time to time. "You made them hurt themselves? That's more mischievous than I took you for.", Richard commented and yet Yujin didn't get very far during his fewer attempts. Richard was surprised he remembered those occasions though. Richard struggled with his clothes. He knew how to layer them but the stupid sash didn't hold it as tightly as he wanted it to. He hated these clothes and he felt pretty stupid for not knowing how to put them on. "I was taught to not eat snow. It's bad for the stomach, at least for sheep and I'm half one.", he pointed out, but cooking water now would take too much time.

    • "Making you laugh is hard but not impossible, though." This was, for better or for worse, one of the easier ways that Richard had to keep Yujin away from him and the fact that it seemed to work was even more astounding. Sure, he did try his best, but sometimes even that wasn't enough and when it really, really wasn't, it almost felt as if he were falling flat onto his face and as if, as harsh as it sounded, he didn't quite matter as much to the blonde was he wanted to - this was fine, he knew that, they wanted nothing from one another except to feel good and that was, what the other was going to give the one asking for it, which was why they both would eventually find that their own shortcomings were a fatal flaw. "I'd say I can't remember but let me think", he mused, actually giving it a thought. Yujin didn't quite remember the now-strangers name, or face, or whyever it had happened, but it did feel good, didn't it? What did he even do to begin with? "You figure out what goes where somehow, but now that I think about it, I think it was quite embarrassing and I was terribly intoxicated", he admitted. Not that this was something that Richard should take as an example, yet he unknowingly did, but there was always room for more, whatever more was or would be. "Let me dream, will you? Then again, you won't let me have my way in those daydreams, which sucks", the wolf sighed, but he did as he had been told and cleared their camp.

      Whatever it was that made him as antsy, he could have tried to pinpoint it, yet, it felt like a waste of his time, especially as he lacked understanding but what was more, he didn't quite figure anything like that out just yet. Richard was his own person, not an object to own and while it made Yujin realize that both of their feelings mattered, it also felt somewhat crushing that he couldn't have what he wanted after all, even when they needed nothing but a few ill-meant feelings to ignite a spark and get to where they'd left off when they were completely drunk. "Then actually torture me the next time?" A proposal like this was probably nothing short of self-humiliation, but maybe he needed just that, it wouldn't be too far off to think of all of this as some sort of practice for when he actually needed it, actually had to lunge that body of his around and make it be useful. "If you can only listen to what someone else is spouting, you're nothing more than complicit and if complicity leads you headfirst into a simple trap, you'd run into a sword for someone else, too. I'm only using what I know as an advantage, that's not bad, right?" There it was again, a small chuckle coming from his lips, before he walked over to Richard, who looked like ... a mess. "You do it like this", Yujin grumbled, as he undid the sash, pulled it tigther and then, when he figured it fit snug on the others waist, tied it the right way. Wasn't his father ever going to teach him? "So the other half can eat snow just fine?", Yujin wondered, before he searched for some that looked like it hadn't been touched in a good while, grapped a fistful and presented it to Richard. "That's the best alternative to water we have, though."
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "Mh. Maybe you should stop trying though, I'm not in the mood for jokes.", Richard sighed. He didn't mean to be mean or upset Yujin and he knew that the last night was somehow nice, at least the second half of it, but he couldn't help but feel down almost all the time. He knew he was being difficult and Yujin deserved better than that, but ditching him didn't seem to work for either of them. At one point would either of them break or at least have enough of all that bullshit? Or would the day Richard would leave come before any of that happened? "So it happened after your accident?", Richard pointed out, he took Yujin for someone having sex very early, but what did he know? How old was he when he first had sex? Fourteen? Maybe Fifteen? It wasn't even that long ago then, but it felt like forever. His days in Adrestia felt like they had happened years ago, as if he got stuck in Silesse ages ago. "So it was just like always?", Richard asked, trying on a joke himself, or at least tease Yujin a little bit. "It would be better if you found someone else to dream about." Maybe Yujin forgot how difficult Richard was all the time and that was why he was still here.

      "So you truly want a harsh training? Why is that?", Richard asked, wondering if Yujin leg wouldn't just kill him and if he was any good with any weapon in the first place? Eventually they didn't spar, but they could at some point if they wanted. Right now Yujin didn't even bring anything but a bow for himself. Well they would probably not need any other weapons and if they did, Richard got his sword and he was good at using it. "I didn't say it's bad. I just didn't take you for someone doing something like that, you seem too honest for something like that.", Richard explained and looked away when Yujin came over to help him once more. He'd gotten better at this, but he still wasn't able to close that thing up properly. Yujin did it for him and he seemed annoyed too, he'd done that too often, didn't he? Richard was embarrassed, but he didn't say anything, instead he watched Yujin pick up some snow and present it to him. "I guess you're right...", Richard mumbled and took the fistful of snow he was offered to bite a piece off of it. He couldn't just not drink any water the whole day until they made a fire and maybe it did nothing to his body anyway. After he was done with that he dried his hands on his clothes, then helped packing up their tent, all the fur and ready the horses.

    • “I’ll just try to get you with one of those jokes when you let your guard down … actually, when we get home, there’s something I’d like to try”, Yujin answered instead of being discouraged by those few words. Sure, there were things that were, by far, not something that he wanted to hear - but Richard also wasn’t the that wanted to be tickled until he couldn’t breathe anymore, so Yujin could try that once they found themselves somewhere that wasn’t the vast, empty and frigid wilderness of Silesse. Though, the fallen prince was right - there was nothing out here, just snow, just fog and an almost always grey sky that seemingly bled together with the ground down there, on the horizon, becoming one. Freedom had to be something else, but Yujin had stopped wondering about all of that years ago, when he realized that Silesse was just like that and that it wouldn’t change to begin with, not as long as Shuren called himself its king anyway. “No, I was just shitfaced, I think.” That wasn’t much of an excuse, but his first time hadn’t been anything special, not when he slept with a man or a woman, not that he wanted to recall either incident tot begin with. “What like always? I can have sex with someone without being drunk, thank you very much.”, the wolf huffed eventually, before giggling ever so slightly. Was this fun or was this just some sort of stupid idea that had taken root in either of their heads?

      “Mh, I just think that I’d benefit more from that than from you being lenient with me.”, was all that he could clarify with, but then again, Richard was being lenient with him, did let him off the hook once already and if he didn’t ask him to not do it, maybe he’d continue and just let the wolf do what he wanted. None of this was any good, this was bullshit, he knew that, but they’d still pack up and try to get out of this barren, white wasteland, running off to someplace that was anything but save, he knew that, but … “I’m my fathers son after all, and if anything, I can be a mischievous bastard just like my old man. Hm, maybe that’s why I suck at anything physical.” That wasn’t much of an excuse anyway, Yujin had no damn idea, he didn’t even know how his father would want him to behave, or try to behave, or what he was intended to be - in the end, he was better of not knowing, ridding their horses of their blankets, putting their belongings back on said horses, before untying them from where they stood. Yujin smiled at Richard, still - why, though? “And? How bad is it?”, he wanted to know as his fellow wolf eventually did take the fistful of snow into his own and ate it. Yujin would do the same, in the end, he needed some hydration too - and thats why he grabbed his own fistful, just as he handed Richard their horses - not that a meager human would be able to really hold them back if they got spooked - but it was worth a try. “Sho, whafpt do ou whantf to do nowf?”, Yujin inquired, his mouth full of snow already.
      Looking back, it maybe is like the toy carts you rode when you were a kid. But those toy carts could never go beyond the walls of the lawn. We want to follow the rugged concrete road beyond the wall. As we've grown, we've decided to leave behind the toy cart.

    • "You want to try something? What?", Richard asked almost worried. What kind of plan did Yujin have now? And why couldn't he try it here? When thinking about things he had there but not here, Richard thought of his way too big bathroom. He actually wouldn't mind sitting in the warm water again, especially after this journey where it mostly was cold and frigid. The tent only helped a little and without an actual wolf b his side, like Yujin or Nayantai, Richard would probably just freeze to death and never wake up again. He was weak, wan't it that? He couldn't live out here alone and that just proved that he needed to defeat Nayantai so he would take him back to Adrestia. "how often does that happen though?", Richard asked and judging by how Yujin talked about and acted around his girlfriend, he could only stand her when he was drunk anyway. Richard asked himself if he truly was the only one he cheated on her with, or if Yujin constantly was up for something he actually liked. Maybe even with his friends, after all he was offered that not too long ago, right?

      "You didn't seem like you actually want to get stronger. Has that changed?", Richard asked and wondered why. Because they were out here now and Yujin wanted to get farther, even if someone tried to stop them? It would be beneficial if he was able to outrun anyone at least, though right now they also had their horses. "If you train you can get stronger, it's just a matter of willpower.", Richard explained, Yujins genes had nothing to do with it and didn't he say he didn't even know to whom of his fathers he was blood related? Richard couldn't tell, they all had the same dark hair, maybe Muhans was a little bit more curly but the straight hair could also come from Yujins mother, so what did he know? "I'll know later when my stomach is turning, or not.", Richard explained after eating some of the snow, though at least he did it slowly and let it melt in his mouth a little before he gulped it down. Yujin ate some too, like a child and as if it actually tasted like something. Richard held onto the horses meanwhile that were by now ready. "Reach the border and once we've done that, ride even further, trying not to get us or the horses hurt by any traps."