sinbound. [Akira & Earinor] [ENG]

"I'm not, don't worry", Ronan chuckled. He truly wasn't, after all, this wasn't anything to worry about and the world wouldn't stop moving just because they did one thing that he didn't immediately agree with. They both had their fair share of secrets they couldn't tell, just like he hoped that the blonde wouldn't find the bloodied bedsheets, Caelan probably had a secret of his own to begin with. Nothing they did here would leave these four walls - it would stay here, but whenever they decided to come back, they'd be allowed to unravel it however they liked, as much as they wanted to. Whatever they desired, they could have, with limitations - but not out here. Out here, the only limitation was, in fact, the shabby hut that they were staying in and maybe the cold weather, once or twice in a week. "Then you better wake up or I will feed you and we both don't want that." As much as he liked to be around Caelan, as horribly good as offering up his body to him sounded, it didn't matter - in the end, he should wake up and maybe not fall face first into the broth that his fellow noble was about to make, sooner or later that was. "Broth, simple as that - that's why I brought the milk and all those vegetables", they could have used some meat too, but wouldn't go out, not right now - no chance in hell.

"Oh? You will keep me warm? I'd love that", he chimed, thinking he'd understood the tone in Caelans voice well enough. What if he got to touch him just a little bit more, then? Ronan wasn't sure, but whatever it'd be, did it even matter? He'd just melt in that strong grasp of his anyway and that was just fine. "Sometimes, if I can see that I'll get rewarded afterwards", the young noble chuckled, content with the grasp that had befallen him and yearning for another one of Caelans touches, but instead, his eyes were glued onto his moving figure. What was so entrancing about him anyway? He wasn't sure, but the one thing he was able to say was, that everything about Caelan seemed alluring - from his words, to his touch, to the way he looked - all of it was responsible for casting a spell on him and robbing him of his senses. "I doubt just watching will satisfy you, but we'll see. If it doesn't, I guess you can touch me too." Whatever they got to that part sooner or later didn't matter, as long as they'd end up there - he was full of anticipation, was yearning for something bigger than he'd been given and yet he'd only be given what he wanted if he did a good job. "I do, in that small dresser over there", he pointed out, but walked over to it - closing the bathrooms door in the process - and took some of them out, laid them on a smaller wooden stand near the tub and then moved away a bit, so that Caelan, who had been in the tub by now, could see him without having to tilt his head too much.

"It's fine, it's not like I'm all that grimy anyway - it's more the lake water that's been glued to my skin or the past day, so shut it and enjoy your little show, will you?", he snapped. Nervosity had been rising in him all along and his body felt uncomfortably stiff, but he didn't care - he just shook it off for now. Again, he unbuttoned some more of his shirt, let it fall off of his shoulders and then, caught in the stupor he was in, sank down onto his knees, stuck his hands where the leather of his boots and the fabric of his pants met and brushed them off as far as he could, let his hands wander once more and made the last button come undone on his shirt, yet he didn't get rid of it, instead he sat up a bit, took off the rest of his damned boots while squatting there and spreading those legs of his for no apparent reason. That couldn't be what Caelan wanted to see, but his shirt was already sinking down the rest of his body anyway, and yet Ronan didn't take it off, instead his hands slid between the fabric of his pants and his skin, shoved it down painfully slow as he finally allowed himself to stand up again for a better position, as he felt the gaze of Caelan resting on him and his cheeks flaring up once more. "I hope this is what you wanted", he mumbled, knowing well enough that he could have spent more time planning this, that it wasn't all that good, but his pants - and his underwear - wandered down ever so slightly, before Ronan let it pool at his ankles and took some steps toward that tub, finally slid out of his shirt and grabbed it by its sleeves as he wrapped it around Caelans neck and pulled him closer. "And? Do I at least deserve a bath?" For one, he was better at touching than showing off and two, his face was red - so very red.

"You're more than welcome to help me cook for us, but lets worry about that later." Wasn't this a bad idea? Knowing himself, he'd get into the tub eventually and wouldn't want to leave and Caelan, being who he was, would only make it harder for him to pull away and dash off. Selfcontrol was limited, even more so when they were together and seemingly thirsting for every damn thing - when they wanted more than they could have and wanted to grasp one another, hold them tight and close, touch them all over and make sure that everyone knew whom they belonged to. Ronan would love to show off all those marks that Caelan had left on him, the already faded out hickeys and lovebites that were marring his body - they were nothing more than bruises and yet, just for once, they were bruises he actually was proud of. "Who doesn't? Rewards always sound nice", Ronan answered, smiling ever so slightly. He'd die for a hot bath right now, but instead, he was forced to put on a show, to be oggled by a pair of watchful eyes that wanted nothing more than to assess what he could ravish later on and honestly, Ronan didn't mind, even if Caelan was acting like he was owning him, rather than merely thinking about it.

"Make me yours, all of me - and leave some marks while you're at it." And yet, he couldn't be the only one that was already coming to terms with warmth pooling in his stomach, with embarrassment written all over his face and his throat being horribly dry. Ronan was, without a doubt, just trying to survive this ordeal and now that he stood before the tub and actually could marble at his lover, he already had his hands on him and Ronan let go of his shirt, threw it to the rest of the clothes he had shedded earlier. "You're eager, again", he mumbled, his eyes fell upon the parts of his lovers hands that he could actually see - they still felt so nice on his soft skin, as if they could simply break through it by the slightest touch alone, at any given minute. Ronan, however, didn't want them around his hips or anywhere else except his throat, coaxing the air out of his lungs and forcing him to gasp, to beg for air - fuck, why was he thinking about that now? "I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it", he mumbled, trying to hide most of his embarrassment - he slipped out of Caelans grasp, into the warm water filling the bathtub and pretty much unprompted, made himself some space in between the blondes legs, so that he could lean back and enjoy his skin against that of his own back. "My wish? I have two, but I can only redeem one. I'm still thinking, about it, but I'd like to tie you up - just a bit so you can't use those pesky hands of yours, have you get on your knees and blow me."

He'd make sure they had a tasty dinner later, right now however, nothing of that mattered all that much. Ronan was convinced if he'd stay out here one more second, naked and away from the warm water he'd filled into the bathtub, he'd go insane and not shiver with anticipation, but rather because he actually was getting cold and because he wanted nothing more than to warm up. Once he'd settled in, the warmth of the water and Caelans body made him melt away already. A slight touch, skin brushing against skin, all of it was enough to cause his skin to get goosebumps, to have his cheeks flare up - he could stay here forever, in this little hut so far away from home. For once, he wished he could stay here, forever, ever and ever, just with Caelan by his side already - but they had duties to attend to, they were heirs to their countries and they shouldn't be doing this, not here, not now, but it felt so good, so right - and in fact, Ronan had never cared. If he ever wanted to disappear, he could - he'd not leave without Caelan though, but convincing him seemed like something he wouldn't be able to achieve, not now anyway, but maybe someday. "Come up with something good, puppy", he purred and cuddled up to the blonde just a bit.

"I am, as much as you are mine", he giggled. Ronan probably wouldn't be able to find anyone else, even if he tried - nobody would be as insane as to submit to his very words, just because a few droplets of alcohol were in his systems. Caelan had been who he wanted and for some reason, he had gotten him to not only submit to him, but also stay so very close to him, it was almost unimaginable to be without him ever again, even if he'd lived all of his life without the blonde so far. "I don't even have any more layers of clothes to shed, what am I supposed to keep going for. You got what you asked for - what else do you want?", Ronan laughed and leaned back, enjoyed those strong arms that wrapped themselves around him and the kisses, sending jolt after jolt of electricity down his very spine and telling him, despite his best efforts, he was not only enjoying himself but also his body was feeling like it didn't want anything else except those soft yet rough touches his lover was willing to give him. "I always do, we should be even, no?", a small chuckle escaped his throat. "I love your hands, don't get me wrong, but I'm sure you could use some discipline ... and also, I want to try out tying someone else up." The calloused hands felt so good on his body, just as the small massage did - it got rid of the tension and helped him relax some more. "My second wish? Those precious hands of yours, wrapped around my throat."

How much longer until he lost his mind? It wasn't just the hot water, the steam rising up or the cold that seemed to cling to his body indefinitely - Ronan was trying his best to do things his way and he was trying much harder to take things slow, but every single patch of his skin that wound up touching Caelan felt like it was bubbling, burning up and like it had been forced to endure so much more bliss than it was willing to take. Would he ever grow bored of what he'd come to love so fast, so fearlessly and without effort, or would he grow to hate it eventually and want to cut all ties with Caelan sooner than later? Wasn't there something more that he wanted, that he desired or was this all just a farce that he'd put up with? Right now, right here came the time to realize that it didn't necessarily matter what he wanted, only that he'd eventually get whatever he'd dsired so far - Caelan was someone that, without doubt, would wind up making those stupid dreams of his come true and that eventually would also find that, maybe - just maybe -, this was also what he'd wanted all along, however wrong it may be to indulge in one another like this.

"Saying that we belong to one another and that we were destined to?", he asked, giggling - enjoying the softness of the situation alone, but Ronan was greedy, always had been and wanted more than Caelan wanted to give him right now, even if he didn't dare saying that. Another jolt of anticipation coursed through his body, pooled in his stomach and while he was lost in whatever hell this was supposed to be, his lips parted and another - albeit small, almost silent - noise crawled out of his throat. "More? Then be a good boy and I'll maybe reward you for it, but we'll see", he chuckled, very well aware that he was the one at Caelans mercy right now, not in charge at all. Love wasn't easy to come by in this life, let alone with the prerequisites that Ronan cared around with him, but right here, right now, he was content. "And if you don't, I'll just whip you into shape, but its good to know that you're agreeing to being a puppy." Here, in this position, he couldn't do much but surrender to Caelan and so he did, let go of the tension his body held and let the blonde do as he desired, however uncomfortable it might have been - why else would he sit here? "I think they'd leave some nice marks, but I also just want to try it out for once, you know?" Maybe he'd hate the feeling that Caelans hands had around his throat, hated all of it, but he doubted it - rather, he thought he'd anticipate getting touched instead. His hair stood on end, his breath was ragged yet again - why could words send him off the edge like that? Why was one simple touch on his chest enough to make it swell with anticipation. "You had something else in mind? Well, I wouldn't mind ... at all."

"Then mark me as yours", he retaliated, but Caelan already had done that - he'd made him his and Ronan couldn't leave his side, not again. What if this was truly fate, if there was nothing except themselves that mattered and what if the world that they found themselves in was just working that way? Ronan didn't want to admit it, but in all honesty, the chances of meeting another man that wanted him like this, without having an ulterior motive, were slim - whereas him, falling for a woman, was nothing that was going to happen anytime soon, at least Ronan thought it wouldn't. Belonging to someone, that didn't sound bad, but could he ever truly do that? Could he belong to someone like Caelan just because he wanted to, or did he have to force himself to become someone else and eventually have to marry someone that he didn't even know? Right now, right here, running away or being born as a peasant sounded better than anything of this - and Caelans lingering touches, so ghastly and yet bubbling, burning, felt like they'd force him out of his shell eventually and make him nothing more than a great pretender that could go about his day just fine, until the doors closed behind him and until he found what he sought.

Right now, however, he was sitting in an old hut atop a hill in a snowy forest, in a bathtub filled with warm water and crammed in together with his beloved, the one that he never wanted to see leaving again. "I did, and you'll get them sooner or later", Ronan chimed, knowing fully well that if they were going at this pace, he'd not wash his hair today and maybe, just maybe, he didn't actually want that. He'd feel even worse later, more disgusting than he already did, but there was no escaping Caelans grasp like this. The faint, numbed touches - swept away by the water - still felt good, but not as nice as they'd felt just earlier, not as firm and warm. "You're not going to hurt me, I just want to see for myself if I like it or not, so don't worry. I will make you stop if I need some air." That, for one, wasn't only easier said then done, but the soft touches he received were horrible - horrible because he couldn't retaliate them, because he was at Caelans mercy and everything he could do was enjoy himself and let him do what he wanted, all the while his senses were overwhelmed already, just as his body was. Eventually, he flinched slightly and got goosebumps yet again as soon as nails dragged themselves over his skin and it all felt so good, so wonderful. There was no escape and he trembled under Caelans grasp and his sometimes harsh, yet loving touches. "No, please, don't", he mumbled, closed his eyes and decided that that was his fate - that he only had to lean back and enjoy. "I don't care, I want more of this, so much more", he mumbled - Caelan was horribly good at riling him up and he couldn't do anything but let him do his worse. "Please, Caelan."

"Always", Ronan mumbled, embarrassed enough by the situation alone. He was here, getting touched by the heir of Fhaergus in a shoddy bathtub and he wanted nothing more than to feel more, than to be touched all over and to finally get all of this over with, crawl back to bed and show the blonde what it was that he actually wanted, that he wanted something more than just his hands or his mouth on him, but right now, right here, nothing of that seemed to matter. Time was but a construct and instead, it didn't matter if they were here for a week or two, or even three, as long as they eventually returned home and were satisfied with the way they'd indulged in one another, it would be just fine. As for himself, he liked being on the receiving end - he liked feeling Caelan so close to him, feeling all of these little touches on his skin that soon enough would be less ghastly - however, the hickey that Caelan wanted to leave, or rather was leaving, was making him ecstatic enough for another noise to make his way over his lips, but this time, Ronan didn't bite it back. He let it out, knowing fully well that he could moan and scream all he wanted here, nobody would hear him, except for Caelan.

His hands looked for support and when he couldn't find it, he just gave up and instead put them on Caelans legs and succumbed to all those thoughts, happening behind closed eyes. Every touch resulted in him feeling so good, so wonderful and all of this bliss shouldn't end, not now or even anytime soon when his lover wanted to take his hands off of him - and now he was the one that wasn't sure if he would end up being able to endure Caelan being tied up and only able to use his mouth. The mental image of the blonde on his knees, of his maybe flushed cheeks and his attempts to escape the ropes grasp all culminated in nothing more than Ronan feeling warmer than before, in him cuddling up to Caelan. "A sign sounds good, lets talk about that later", he mumbled, biting his own lower lip soon after, if only to keep the noises inside and feel his own lungs bursting with the air he was sucking in to not even consider breathing out and let go of a barrage of oh so many sinful noises. Instead, his fingers digged into Caelans leg and as much as he tried to relax, he couldn't - not once, or even for a second - instead his body was tensing up under his lovers grasp, ever so slightly, but definitely more thn earlier. They really weren't going to end up clean like this. "Caelan", he mumbled, more moaning it than anything. "I ... I ... wanted to ..." What did he want? Nothing important, probably.

It wasn't a lie to say that he hated himself - he wanted to be more like Caelan, less like himself. Maybe Darragh would like him more if he wasn't as meek, as thin - maybe, just maybe, if he'd been as tall and strong as him he wouldn't be gifted with so man bruises that left endless trails on his skin and so many bad memories within. To Caelan, he might be beautiful, in all his glory, as he leaned back and enjoyed himself, but Ronan wasn't able to funciton - he didn't want to be himself and that, quite frankly, was the worst of his flaws. Realizing that he might as well like himself at some point in his life wasn't up for debate, not right now and Ronan was also not entirely sure if he ever would. Rather, he'd melt some more in that lovely grasp that was holding him down firmly, that wandered over his body and forced so many noises out of his throat. Caelan was his, he was Caelans and nothing would be able to change that now, not when he was leaving both visible and invisible marks on him and Ronan was more than convinced that nothing truly mattered, as long as it happened outside of the cabin.

All of this was unbearable - they had gotten into the tub why exactly? Because he wanted to clean, so he should have left the rest to later, but now they were particularly glued to one another and not leaving the rest to later. Instead, he was already forcing air out of his lungs, out of his throat and his ragged breathing and the inability to bite his own lips any longer, the inability to not squirm under every touch, ended up being his bane. "Caelan", he gasped, concentrating on the very touch that was etching itself into his skin and mind. Ronan could no longer think clear, hadn't been able to do that before either, but right now it was even worse. Everything washed over him, a wave of pleasure after the other, why were they doing this? They should be doing this later, after all of this and not right now. As good as it felt, as much as he wanted it, the hands that had been clawing themselves into Caelans thighs let go and instead grabbed his wrist, heard the nobles heart thrum against his ear. "Caelan, I ... still wanted to ...", he mumbled and even as he wanted to pry away his hand, wasn't strong or fast enough. Instead, he groaned - he came undone in Caelans grasp, without even wanting to, moaned the nobles name one more time. "You ...", he mumbled. "I wanted to ... wash ... my hair, but I guess ... I need to do that ... later."

Caelan had him in his grasp and Ronan could, essentially, do nothing more than surrender to him. At least they didn't stain their bedsheets or anything else and had little trouble searching for any potential stain, in fact, they both were still sitting here and unwilling to waste the water now which, by all means, was somewhat understandable. Ronan knew well enough what a hassle it was to heat up water out here and right now, he felt like he'd been glued to Caelan anyway - he didn't want to move, not a single centimeter, because Caelan was still so wholly warm - and now, he felt bad about it. Whereas his lover had touched him, Ronan hadn't been able to do anything, only grabbing his legs and thigh, clawing himself into the blondes flesh - but that was about all of what he could do. Instead, all the pleasure had been redirected to him and him alone and he'd come undone so fast, so quick, they both probably should have taken their time instead. Truth be told, he didn't mind, but he knew fully well that it didn't matter anyway - they both had enough time that they could spend together, even later on - and this was just the beginning of all that.

"You ... aren't ...", he mumbled, was still somewhat exasperated and tried to catch his thoughts before they could overtake him. What should he do? What did he need to do? The proposal, as sweet as it was, sounded like it would be a hassle however and only thrummed against his ears just like Caelans beating heart did, just like his own beating heart did. "That sounds ... wonderful", Ronan chimed, slowly moved in the still present grasp of his lover - and ever so slightly tried to change his position, just so that he could press a kiss to the blondes lip and smile at him. "I'll show you where you have to go, puppy." Right now, right here, they both were on their own and sooner or later, he'd have to go out and hunt - brace themselves against the cold - and he'd hate every single second of it for what it was. Some of his skin must still reek of the lakes water, just like his face and his hair did, but right now, he rather kissed Caelan, prodded himself onto his knees and leaned in to press a kiss or two to the blondes throat, to bite his collarbone, softly lick over it, suck on it to leave a mark of his own. Ronan was, without a doubt, not going to leave the same marks as Caelan did, but as he moved back up, towards the blondes throat, he only bit down ever so soft, sucked on it and laid his arms over his lovers neck, let them dangle over them and hang out of the tub. "But cooking with you would be nice, too." Albeit a hassle, because he'd probably have to watch out for what the blonde was doing - but for now, he sealed the deal with a kiss, just this once.

Their hunger for one nother seemed to be almost insatiable - they couldn't resist themselves, or one another and simply did what they desired, which had resulted in them not only making the water unusable but also in them, ruining their original plans. Wasn't this what they were supposed to expect, or was it simply that they only had to shed their many useless pieces of cloth that, in turn, would result in them finally realizing that they weren't able to survive without one another if every single moment without one another was a horrible one? Maybe they'd tire of one another by the end of the week, but something told Ronan that it seemed unlikely, as unlikely as it was for them to stop wanting to be with one another and leave marks on the others skin, just to mark them as their very own. Almost, as if nothing could stop them from indulging in their very own sins and as if it was impossible for them to understand what exactly it was that bound them to one another. In reality, they'd probably have to endure so many more years at the others side, yet so far away from one another - their relationship shouldn't be like this and yet it was.

"Mhm", he hummed, satisfied with what he'd done to the blonde already - this was their own little secret and they both knew, well enough at that, how to keep it, whether they wanted to or not. Was it because they both had lost their minds too long ago, or rather because, in reality, they still didn't fully understand one another? What was it, that they truly wanted and what was it that just happened because they felt like they should do it? Ronan liked putting those lips on his onto Caelans body, onto his lips, his throat, his collarbones or wrapping them around his ... "Fair, that's true", he chimed, picking up that small hum, but eventually, he just let go of Caelan and got out of the tub, lazily reached for one of those towels he'd prepared earlier and dried himself off. "Well, we can enjoy ourselves later", he giggled and eventually draped the now-wet towel over his shoulders, picking up the clothes he'd gotten out of earlier. "I'll change into something more comfortable and you'd do good to dress yourself warm. I'll show you where you have to go", he elaborated, waltzed back to the tub to give Caelan a small, less sensual kiss on the corner of his mouth and then walked off, back to their belongings to go grab some clothes - and put them on.

Should he have stayed in there and indulged in his own ideas a little while longer? Should he have satisfied Caelan as a reward, or was it alright for him to just not do anything for the blonde? What was it, if not his duty to help the blonde wind down too and just give a bit of what he'd done back to him? Ronan had tried his best, just for a while, just for a second there - and yet he found himself fleeing the bathtub, putting on some fresh, loose clothes that actually kept him war and slipping into some socks, just so that he could enjoy himself and be free of all those tight clothes instead. "I'll try my best", and thus, he explained to Caelan where he had to go and what it was that would await him there. After that, he was basically left to his own devices, slipped into one soft plush coat of his own and set out to understand how to make broth, of all things. He wouldn't need more water for that and instead searched for the cutting board, a sharp knife and some bowls that he could divide all of this stuff into, before he set out to cut and peel some of the carrots and parsnips he'd brought, following the instructions ever so closely.

If there was one thing he was used to, it was holding a knife - if it was one thing he wasn't used to, then it was using said knife on something that was not his very own skin. Thus, he cut - cut the carrots, put them into the boiling water, did the same for the parsnips, the onion and the turnips - this was going to turn into the most horrible broth he could imagine, should it go on like this. More than that, he didn't have; there was no meat here and the loaf of bread didn't go into the soup - the only thing that actually, truly did, was the milk after the vegetables had boiled for while and Ronan had been sure to season whatever the hell was going on in that pot. Maybe they should have gone out for a hunt, caught a bunny and then used it, but for now, all they had was this - and they had to make do. Caelan was gone awfully long by the time he had put the milk into the pot, watched all of it simmer and stirred from time to time, just a bit, before he'd occassionally take a peek outside and look for the blonde, who, eventually made his way back to the hut. "There you are! And here I thought something got ahold of you", he laughed and, before he could even register it completely, he was glued back onto the blonde, taking one of those buckets of water from him, tiptoeing and pressing a kiss to his cheeks. "Does it sound stupid if I say I missed you?"