A thin line [Winterhauch & Michiyo]

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    • A thin line [Winterhauch & Michiyo]

      Ladies and Gentlemen - the Protagonists.
      Jax: @Winterhauch | Ginny: @Michiyo
      __________________________________


      “Soul frightening, face whitening. Fear that you can't reverse. My phone has no signal, it's making my skin crawl. The silence is so loud, the lights spark and flicker with monsters much bigger than I can control now. Welcome to the panic room where all your darkest fears are gonna come for you…”

      The loud music was banging against the thick walls of a house Ginny has never been to before. It was the first big thing she attended since she found her new friends. They have been to parties here and there, hung out in someone's room or at random spots always satisfying their hunger for fun, adventure and chaos. Same shit different day she thought but Levie made sure to put that girl in her place. This would be a completely different level even though no one could tell her why. First and foremost it was a party only the “cool kids” got invited to - which they weren't. Some rich kids birthday or whatever the occasion was - who cared anyways? As long as there was free booze they´d crash the party if they found a way in, which was basically the easiest part of the whole plan. It was not like there was security like one would see at a club or anything. Some random guy answered the door letting them in with a quick “Hey guys, you friends of Selenas?”. The group only nodded while the redhead pressed the words “Yea, sure.” out her mouth without even blushing. Ginny wasn't sure what to think about that girl. Levie was tolerant enough to let the new girl hang with them, but it was quite obvious that she just wasn't up for the fight against Ava, who introduced the blonde in the first place.

      “I'll be back in a sec.” Ava gave her a quick smile before leaving the room they occupied upstairs.
      Random faces were with them but not one of them seemed to care. Cami silently sat down on one of the couches that stood in the middle of the room and started to flick through the pages of a book she stole from the shelves. It looked like a fancy office and even had one of these globe bars where rich people stored their finest bottles. Levie was just about to open one of them with a cigarette between her lips she had yet to put on. "You're not supposed to smoke up here.” a random girl interrupted while Levie already lit it up. “Oh shit.” she exhaled the smoke ironically. “Come here, lend me a hand to put it out.” The redhead nearly spitted the words to her feet while holding the cigarette between her index and middle finger, ready to push it into that nosy bitches arm.
      Ginny had known Lavender long enough to know when it was best to just leave her be. “I'll go get myself something to drink.” she excused herself into the corridor to follow the steps downstairs. The beat was just as loud as everywhere. With sonos, apple play and alexa going on it was easy to ring out a whole mansion at once. But it made it seem more like a big party instead of little gatherings in all the rooms. This freaking house was three maybe four times as big as the bungalow she was living in with her dad and sister. Comparing yourself to others rarely did any good…

      “Shit, sorry!” Ginny nearly had to scream so the boy she ran into could hear her voice over the music. His drink was all over the floor but gladly both of their clothes were mostly spared. A quick trip to the kitchen served them well. New drinks, a little chit chat while that dude tried to get rid of the stain on his and also on Ginny's clothes. “Don't worry, I'm good.” She forced a smile and soon after found an excuse to get going. Back on her way upstairs - this time with a drink in her hand - she squinted into the office to find Ava still missing. Fighting her way through the crowd, blondie tried to find her but ran into strange faces instead. One was actually pretty cute. “Don't I know you?” This handsome guy came around with the most awkward pickup line. “I think I'd remember a beautiful face like yours.” Ginny answered without any facial expression, only taking a sip of her drink. Flirting was easy, at least that was her experience but mostly because the majority of the fellows she talked to wanted to get into her pants anyway. For some reason this dude was not that fond of her. “You're that new kid.” he then realized. “Look, don't get me wrong you´re fine as hell and if it wouldn't be for my sister i´d probably fancy you but I wouldn't touch Cami's friends over her dead body.” Mateo rejected Ginny with a laugh.
      “For fucks sake! I can't let you out of sight now can I?” Ava grabbed her by the arm pulling her into the room next door. “How was I supposed to freaking know that that's Mateo?”
      “Are you kidding me? Have you seen his face? He looks like her god damn twin ginny!”
      “Jeez, would you calm down now please.” A look around the room made her realize that they were not alone. His ice blue eyes immediately caught her eye. He wore his jet black hair in a loose bun and looked bored? Ginny couldn't quite tell the look on his face. “Ginny.” she introduced herself with another sip from her straw. “No, not happening.” Avery raised her index finger as if she could make it undone. “The hell?” Ginny laughed. “You guys would just get along, hook up, fall in love, drag each other down, fight, break up and make me fucking choose on whos side I´m on.”
      “Man you seriously got some separation anxiety going on.” “That's why I can't have this!” Ava again waved with her finger between the two strangers. Both girls started laughing.
      “So you wanna hang out or do you need to get some work done?” Ava faced Jax handing him the money with a subtle handshake. Only now Ginny figured who that good looking guy was. Avery invited him for the clientele in the first place. She knew he could use the money - literally like all of them. After all these years Ava still felt like she owed him so she gave him hints where to sell his load. These rich kids could afford to buy whatever they desired. At a party with free liquor all one needed was some fun or as Ava would call it - a cocktail for disaster.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • They didn’t know it when they turned me loose
      I shot the sheriff and I slipped the noose
      The law ain’t never been a friend of mine
      I would kill again to keep from doing time
      You should never ever trust my kind

      |I’m a wanted man|

      __________________________________________

      Jax had never been the type for occasions like this one.
      A typical rich kids party in a house big as a mansion and too many ridiculously expensive shit in every room - From the ugly vase in the corner to the hundreds of old books no one had possibly never read. It was a text book example for wealth with all the pictures of a smiling and happy family in pricey gold and silber frames. He hated it instantly. In a crowd full of laughing and drunk students Jax stood out like the big bad wolf between dumb sheeps. With his hight he towered over most of the other guys and his piercing stare alone kept the prying questions at bay. The young man with the jet black hair and the even darker tattoo lines creeping over his neck wasn't a person you want to mess with. The only reason he made an effort to behave like a civil person for once was Ava, who greeted him with a big smile on her face. So he decided to stop killing random guys with his death glare und followed the girl to a more private area.
      The overly loud music dulled to a simple background noice once the door closed and only the heavy beat vibrated throug the floor and walls. He would probably never understand why Ava liked these people so much. Everyone behaved like kids on a playground having fun with no idea how the real world works while there were drinking and partying their lifes away.
      The plan was simple: Go in, sell your shit and get out.
      The hell, he thought at the same seceond the new girl laughed out the words. Ava knew exacly that he would never hook up with a friend of hers. He kept the two worlds he lived in strictly separated while he balanced on a tightrope ready to take the fall. Jax knew without doubt that he was'nt meant to get old, sitting on a lovely porch in a rocking chair. The lifestyle he'd chosen would kill him sooner or later. Probably sooner than later. If it weren't for the annoying feeling that Ava over time grew on him like a little sister, he would have never spoke to her again after beating down those douchebags in that dark alley.
      Jax looked down on their joined hand with a short nod and stashed the money in the hidden pocket inside his leather jacket. Over Avas shoulder he glanced at the pale girl who introduced herself as Ginny. Maybe he took a moment too long, but damn, that girl was something else. With her pale skin and slim figure she seemed so fragile that your protector instinct kicked in no matter if you're a tough guy or not.
      His gaze snapped back to his friend. At the look of disbelief in her eyes, he just shrugged casually and one of his dark eyebrows wandered nearly into his hairline like he tried to say nonverbal: What? She's hot.
      "That's really tempting, but I need to watch out for that idiot Freddy before he ends up being his own customer again..." His voice was practically a low growl at that. "Lance's gonna kill me for real this time if Freddy f*cks this up again. Jesus, I'm not his god damn nanny."
      Freddy was a troublemaker.
      He consumed more of the drugs he normally was supposed to sell and always ended up in shitty situations. It would'nt be the first time for him to be dragged away by a very angry Jax because the stupid redhead was high as a kite and could'nt feel his own feet anymore.
      Jax fished around in his jeans pocket for the pack of cigarettes. He really, really needed a smoke right now because the thought alone stressed him out. Freddy and Jax worked for a dangerous man and he would not risked getting his fingers choped of because that jerk didn't own some self control.
      "I need to go, Ava. Business' calling.", he said with a loopsided grin wich was espacially reserved for Ava. "And thanks for the hint."
      With the burning cigarette in the corner of his mouth he stalked over to the door and halted a second to face the pale girl named Ginny. "See you around, Sweetie.", he growled and disappeared without another word.
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 1 mal editiert, zuletzt von Winterhauch ()

    • Sweetie? She thought raising an eyebrow but only to follow his footsteps out the door. "What a lovely little boy." "Stop it." "What? I'm just sayin-" "You're not saying anything because Jax is off limits alright?" Both silently walked out the room, heading to the one next door where they left Levie and Cami. Most of the strange faces already left the office, shortly after the fight between Levie and that random chick Ginny assumed. “Took you long enough.” the Redhead greeted them with an expensive bottle in her hand, she had earlier stolen from the bar. Even Cami had put the book aside to join her drinking the fine liquor, sitting next to each other. There was plenty of room left for them to fuse in, so they did, one next to the brunette, the other on the floor. “You are such a weirdo.” Levie looked down to the newest member of the group, who sat in front of them. She never needed more than a pillow to feel comfortable. Really Ginny could have gotten cozy anywhere she liked, not needing more than she had on herself. The perks of being a rolling stone that never settled. Revealing the present Ava got from Jax this birthday was just about to reach the next Level. A quick taste of the blue kisses would do the trick. Leading them into a night of carefree joy…

      Survival of the richest the city's ours until the fall. They're Monaco and Hamptons bound but we don't feel like outsiders at all. We are the new American, high on legal marijuana, raised on Biggie and Nirvana - We are the new American. We know very well who we are so we hold it down when summer starts. What kind of dough have you been spending? What kind of bubblegum have you been blowing lately?

      Everything went by in a blurr. The mood changed so quickly that Ginny didn't know what to think or do. Everyone else on the other Hand seemed to know exactly what they wanted - run! Getting out there while they could. Not a dumb decision to make. “Move Avery, we have to go!” Levie screamed in one corner having a problem with keeping the masculine girl at bay. Seeing her best friend's body going down like a punch bag made her sick to the stomach. It didn't take long for her to realize that the redhead was right. Staying wouldn't bring her back, getting locked behind bars wouldn't help either. “Ginny! "Let's go!” was the last tone that ringed in her ears before she found herself completely alone with an unconscious Cami. “Fuck.”

      “Pack your things Jax - the party is over!” Lavender yelled into the chaos, not knowing if the boy was anywhere to be found. Word had already spread and the police were on its way. “Get Ginny out of here!” Ava on the contrary had no trouble spotting the tall guy in the crowded room even though her view was blurred from her tears.

      Time seemed to stand still. The loud background noises of people screaming, rushing down the stairs, the slamming door everything was dull compared to her beating heart that rang in her ears. "Cami wake up!" there was nothing left than to scream at her. Her face was just as pale as ginnys while her lips had a blue cast. She did not respond, unable to be awakened. Was she even breathing? Rolling her on the side wasn't as easy as one might think it was. The brunette's body was limp and heavy despite her petite figure. "She's not breathing." only a whisper since she was talking to herself. Why didn't she run? Ginny didn't even know her for good, everyone else was fleeing the scene but she knew better than that. There was no need to be afraid of their own use or possession. Ducey signed the bill for the good samaritan law a few years ago, allowing people to help on the spot without further consequences. But that was only the theory of course… Everyone knew that officers could be..different. Not knowing what to do Ginny tucked her into blankets she found on the couch and started to support Camis breathing but the help came too late…
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • The panic-stricken screams ringed in his ears like an annoying song that's hard to forget.
      It was spreading uncontrollable lika a melody of chaos and fear. The whole party came to a sudden end and everyone ran around in panic to collect their things and leave before the cops finally showed up. Jax looked around as Lavenders voice echoed over the noisy crowd of young adults and teenagers. He really could'nt risk being caught by the police with all the questionable pills he hid in his leather jacket. That would meant al lot of years behind bars and with everything he knew about a certain criminal, Lance would rather kill Jax himself instead of letting him utter one single syllable to the authorites.
      It wasn't like Jax was known for singing like a bird anyway. He couldn't count the times he had a knife to his throat or the barrel of a gun pressed against his temple. He'd alomst bled to death once after an unfortunate incident with a very angry client. He owend Lance more then turning into a lousy traitor. Carefully he stashed away everything that was left over and gripped for Freddy who leaned on his shoulder like dead weight. The amount of pills he swallowed, could have knocked out an elephant. Lance wouldn't be thrilled about that and the money he'd lost because of this.
      Jax coldly ignored the others and dragged Freddy out of the house just to dump the idiot into the backseat auf a black vehicle with more force than necessary. It was still a mystery to the black haired how fast Freddy got into this bad shape that he couldn't even spell his name properly. The only explanation: He hadn't took the pills alone.
      He glanced over his shoulder and made sure that Ava and her stupid friends were out of danger. Between the drunks he spotted the girl and breathed a sigh of relief. It was time to get out but something wasn't quite right.
      "We have to go, Jax. Now." The driver in the front seat was getting nervous. "Jax! Dammit, were do you think you're going!?"
      "What are you wating for!? I'll be okay, get out of here. We meet at the usual place. Now, go!", Jax jumped out of the car wich drove away seconds later with dangerous speed and screeching tires.
      Jax ran over to Lavender to check on Ava.
      "What the f*cking hell happend!?", growled Jax in a low voice. "Wait, where is your other friend? The new girl? Pale as a sheet?"
      Jax snorted when no one answered.
      "Great friend you are, huh? I give a flying f*ck about you, Lavender, but if anything happends to Ava on the way home, you're screwed. And now get out of my face.", he snarled before he went back to the front porch of the now empty house.
      It wasn't very difficult to find something when you knew what you're looking for.
      In the very center of the living room knelt a girl with pale blond hair one the ground over er lifeless friend. Jax had seen enough motionless bodies with blue lips and empty eyes starring into nothingness, that he instantly knew it was a los cause. Slowly he approached the too quiet girl, Ginny he remembered, who was clearly in a state of shock.
      "Sweetie?", he wispered, trying to get er attention. "Listen, you can't help her anymore. You have to get up, Ava's gonna skin me alive if I leave you here."
      Sirens ringed in the distance and as gentle words failed, the tall dealer roughly grabbed for her upper arm to get er up.
      The only reason he did this was for Ava.
      If it was anybody else he would have left her for the cops without batting an eyelash.
      "For f*cks sake, I don't have time for this bullshit.", he growled and pulled the traumatized gril to himself against ist broad chest. He ignored every weak attempt to free herself und dragged Ginny away from er silent friend out of the back door.
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 3 mal editiert, zuletzt von Winterhauch ()

    • Everything around her was dead silent.
      The room that had been the life of the party just a few seconds ago seemed to be quiet enough to hear a pin drop; or was it just her ears that shut down? She was about to put her lips on the thin blue lines that used to be a squeaky pink before as she felt the grip around her arm. Eyes wide in disbelief and her mouth slightly open to form a word - any word but it wasn't till Jax started to move that Ginny found her voice again. “We can't just leave her.” The cool evening breeze hit the blonde like a splash of cold water. Of course she left her jacket inside and -again- was dressed too lightly to be hanging around outside at that late hour.
      The chill didn't bother her anyway. Both had bigger problems; it was not like they were about to freeze to death anyhow. Regardless of his strength and height Ginny wasn't going to give up so easily. Stopping in her motions her gaze went on the taller man. She looked him right dead in the eye. The contrast of his dark hair with that piercing look of an ice blue color would get him any girl he liked, but Ginny wasn't gonna fall for that. Blame it on the aftermath of the pills even so one could tell that Jaxon was a good looking guy if you weren't afraid of his appearance. She for sure wasn't…
      “I need to go back inside.” her jaw set at the thought of it. “I couldn't live with myself if I left her to die. Alone…” she added quickly after realizing that Cami already looked like she had passed the bridge. “They need to identify her. Her family needs to know..my jacket.” her voice cracked as the sirens got closer. A sound too familiar she wished to erase from her memory. The lights were blinding. A blurry vision made her close those hazel eyes for a split second. It was at that moment the girl felt her knees shaking. In fact the whole body was vibrating. Has she been like that all along? One must have been out of their mind to suggest such a plan. Too much was at stake and good will normally didn't cut the case. “The law is on my side, they can't press any charges if they find me at the scene trying to save her. I won’t rat you out but you need to leave! The officers can’t see you anywhere near just let me handle this. Cami never does much, she is like a saint watching everyone around going down the wrong road. She can't be dead. She can't be overdosed…” the words came out a little too fast, too harsh to sound like the innocent frail girl one could see in her. Being under the influence probably made her voice sound like gibberish nevertheless. That pounding heart of hers didn't make it seem like she was at ease at all.
      Again the sirens sang their song coming closer every minute they spent talking rather than walking.
      The Police were just around the corner about to turn into their street.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • Completely out of nowhere any movement came to a sudden halt.The petite girl in front of Jax looked him dead in the eye and was determined to get back to her lifeless friend. There weren't many people around with enough courage to talk back at him, especially in a shit situation like this. He had to hand it to her; the girl had some guts for her small frame. It was kind of compelling to him. His thoughts worked overtime behind his steely eyes and after a few seconds he let go of her upper arm. It wasn't his business if she wanted to stay and he could tell Ava he had tried a least. After all, he wasn't a nanny for a girl wich could clearly handle things herself and still he had a bad feeling about letting her alone in this lost place.
      "Fine, whatever.", he growled.
      Jax hesitated for a fractured moment, police sirens loud and threatening in his ears, and with a groan of pure annoyance he shrugged of his leather jacket. A little awkward and perhaps a little to roughly the tall guy wrapped the jacket, warm through is own body heat, around the narrow shoulders. Jax reached into all hidden pocket, the back of his hand touched Ginny body like a barely there whisper, to make sure there was nothing sispicous inside anymore. He felt the warmth of Ginny right through his skin and became more and more aware of the icecold air surrounding them now that it hit his bare arms thanks to the old, ratty t-shirt. His right arm up to the wrist was almost completely covered ins black ink. It was all curved lines and tribal like tattoos. The design followed the defined muscles up his arm, disapearing under the short sleeve of his shirt, just to continue from the collar up to the sight of his strong neck.
      Without a single word, Jax reached out to Ginny again and wrapped his fingers around her delicate wrist. He pulled a marker from a pocket and easily unscrewed the cap with his teeth. Almost gently and inch by inch he pushed the sleeve of his leather jacket up her arm, fingertips unexpectedly carfull on the soft skin of the inside of her forearm like he feared to break the tender surface with his rough hands.
      "In case you need something. Anything.", he whispered in the cold air. "For some reason you're important to Ava and that's the only reason I'm doing this. She has enough stupid and self centered friends already. She could use a real friend for once."
      In a messy handwirting Jax scribbeld a number on her forearm and after that finally let er out of his grip.
      "Take care, sweetheart.", he mumbled and there was a tiny smile around the corner of his mouth. It was gone as quickly as it appeared in the first place, leaving behind a emotionless expression on his face.
      Then he was gone into the darkness of the night, carefully hiding the slight limp in his bad leg.

      Jax had the uneasy feeling that it was going to rain soon.
      And by that he didn't just mean the weather.
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 3 mal editiert, zuletzt von Winterhauch ()

    • Lending Ginny his jacket was surprisingly thoughtful of him. The slow stroke on her back sent a shiver down her spine, looking at him in disbelief, still meeting his eyes with a calm energy but this guy was out to have a death wish. It was best to get going instead of arguing about done decisions. Her hair whirling around as she faced the building, she left Jax behind with a nod and went back inside. Memorizing the Number on her arm she kept running them up and down in her head. It has been her strongest suit to learn stuff by heart in school and also in college. As soon as she had it down in her system Ginny wiped the ink into a dark beam - leaving nö evidence of him behind except for that leather jacket. Even though the Police couldn't charge her in theorie, they would take her into Custody since she was the only one at the crime scene. Having a Number written on your arm was just gonna draw attention and they would have checked it for sure. Her handsome helper in need would have been screwed pretty fast. The heavy fabric on her shoulders was just another piece in their puzzle. Getting rid of it would have been the right call yet she kept it. She just hoped that she wouldn't regret it. He was a dealer - the dealer! - to be precise. Jax would have been the first behind bars if the officers would figure it out. It was up to Ginny's ability to lie if the black head would find himself in jeopardy. So the petite girl thought about ditching it but she had a history of overthinking. Better safe than sorry was her motto instead of jumping straight into action. With the last piece of his warmth around her she went straight into CPR, kneeling over Camis unconscious body.Cops followed shortly after. Being taken away in handcuffs was definitely not something the Blonde had on her "to-do before you die list". Quite the opposite! She still saw the day her dad got taken away flashing before her eyes on sleepless nights. Of course her mind went there directly as she could feel the cold steel against her wrists. Unable to protest, she kept quiet while they took her into custody till the drugs wore out.

      A night in prison - Ginny could check that from her bucket list now like a funny story one could share at a party. Her dad, who had to come pick his daughter up from the station, didn't seem to be amused at all. "What the hell Virginia!" He yelled as he saw his offspring in the hall still in handcuffs while a female deputy was leading the way to a separate room. "Sir if you would just wait outside while we get your daughter's final statement she would be off the hook in no time." she kindly warned him before both disappeared behind a thick door. Finally out of cuffs Ginny was asked to sit down. Flickering lights, a cheap desk and paint crumbling from the walls it was all a surreal blur to her. Like she was trapped in a movie. Blessed with a headache from dehydration and low on energy she instantly understood what was going on. The officers took her statement the night before yet she found herself in that room. The Lady sat across the table, leaning back in her chair as if she had time to spare. Instead of spitting words in her direction the girl waited for that woman to start. Patiently crossing her arms and staring into that Cops green eyes. They reminded her of a snake with that rich emerald of a color.
      “Pretty big jacket for a girl this small.” the deputy finally hissed.
      "It's my boyfriends.”
      “That boyfriend of yours, was he at the party?”
      “No. I just like to wear his shit. Makes him mad, especially when I'm out with friends.” Ginny showed no empathy for that woman. Not a big shocker given her background.
      “Miss Camila Mendes, one of those?”
      “Not really. We go to the same college, I saw her here and there in classes and parties but that's about it.”
      “Being the new kid has to be hard.” Here we go down that road, Ginny thought, rolling her eyes.
      “Ma´am with all due respect. I know you´ve probably seen my record, being a foster kid, changing families now and then, dad recently out of prison. Trust me I´ve got enough on my plate. If I would have anything to do with whatever went down at that party I would have been the first to get the hell out of there. You can not charge me for talking stuff, you also can not charge me for being at the wrong place at the wrong time. All the details I could give you I already shared with the deputy who had me in Handcuffs yesterday so yea. You´ve got nothing and if I'm not mistaken I'm here on non-obligatory terms since you had me questioned twice without a legal authority. I spent the night in jail, you have my statement so if there are nö more questions regarding the crime scene I would kindly ask to see my father now."
      "If you want this to be the last time in jail you should get that attitude fixed missy." The deputy raised an eyebrow. She wouldn't let a young girl get the best of her. "You are free to go."

      It was easy to tell that her Dad was furious. He spent the whole car ride yelling at his passenger. Ginny knew that he was scared rather than angry. Despite their differences they never stopped caring for each other. "Can you imagine what it feels like to get that call? That your own daughter was brought into prison?" She was listening to all he had to say. George had a lot of steam to let out but that sentence had her speak. "I think I've got quite the perspective on that." her voice was a soft whisper while their eyes met in silence. The rest of the ride was dead silent…

      The sun began to set when Ginny decided to sneak out and go to the Playground. She was grounded, only allowed to attend classes and go to her newly gained meetings. No young adult would have listened to that and neither did she. The numbers in her head were waiting to be used as her fingers wrote down a simple request. "Be there." only giving him the time and location to meet. Not a single question mark. Without waiting for a response she grabbed her bike, cycling all the way to the wealthy neighborhood till she reached the hill where a huge sandpit awaited her. A double swing rocked empty in the wind and the slide burned in the orange color of the Sun. The high climbing frame in the shape of a wooden castle was something else. Growing up she and Clementine never had anything like it. Their wildest childhood memories included their mother inhaling one cigarette after another while letting the Kids play on the driveway with calc or jumping through the lawn sprinkler in summer. Lucky for her that she was old enough to make her own decisions now and in that moment she went up that fort. Like a princess on her throne she waited for her prince to arrive.

      With a whistle Ginny tried to draw his attention as Jax entered the Playground obviously not looking for her in the heights. Her legs stood out of a structure that seemed to be the replica of a window while she rested on the ledge. "No peeking!" her high melody of a voice rang given the fact that she yet again wore nothing more than a dress. At least her petite figure was covered by the leather jacket. "Probably not your usual hang out spot." her hand tapped on the wood to invite him to sit next to her once he climbed up the castle. The view was unexpectedly beautiful, showing half of the wealthy district. From here the villa in which Cami passed away was clear to see. One could even witness how the family jumped into the pool as if nothing had happened. It was that view that made her pick the spot for their meeting.
      "It's a shame how they get to live their lives protected from everything while people like us…" Ginny hesitated. She wasn't one to judge a book by its cover. Really she knew better than to jump to conclusions but somehow Jax didn't seem too different from her. His present radiated a familiar energy that pulled Ginny closer to him. She wasn't afraid of him, why would she? It needed more than his height with a death stare to scare her away.
      "You wanna trade?" In one hand she held a black coin that had the number 24 imprinted followed by the words "faith, courage, spirit and love". "They made me go to NA meetings." She explained why she carried a 24 hour recovery token. Since joining the narcotics anonymous was the only consequence she had to face she could count herself lucky but she was never a talker. Social would not be a word one would use to describe the Blonde. "Thank you for you know…" her lips formed a brief smile when she met his eyes and returned the jacket. "I told them it was my boyfriends so you should be off the hook but technically you're stuck with me now." She laughed softly facing the view again. "Have you heard anything? Ava is not picking up her phone and I didn't dare to contact the others. The Police are probably all over them." Normally Ginny wasn't easy to talk to. She was too shy at first, scared of what one would think of her and what impression she left behind but it was different with Jax. Ridiculous! Everyone else would have feared talking to that man yet Ginny didn't. Maybe that was the whole point. Living a life feared by others must have been lonely and she knew exactly what that felt like.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • "Would someone be so kind to explain what the hell that shit was last night!?"
      Lance voice ringed uncomfortable in his ears like the shriek of a hysteric screaming banshee at midnight. To say the man was absolutly furious was the understatement of the year. Lance wasn't build like a brutal thug, he rather had the cunning und sleazy nature of an old-fashioned gangster. But in those few seconds even rough guy like Jax cocked his head carfully between his shoulders. Only one wrong move separated him and the others from beeing hit by a bullet as Lance waved a loaded gun at their faces. Miller wasn't a good shot, Jax wasn't to keen on risking a bullet between his eyes. That man surley had a bad temper but who was Jax to judge about that.
      A nearley soundless 'Ping' urged from the back pocket of his jeans. He decided to ignor it for the time beeing.
      Calmly, you could yas submissivley, Jax raised both hand in the air and took a cautious step in Lance' direction, to his boss and former mentor.
      "You're right. It doesn't look good, but I swear nobody will draw a connection from the dead girl to you. It was the typical highschool-teenage-party that escalated way to quickly like so many times before. It's nothing special. She ist just another f*cking junkie who didn't know when to stop.", Jax tried. "Have I ever given you a reason not to trust me?"
      The sound of a violent and unexpected hit echoed through the luxurious office in the back of the club. Lance snorted and looked at the trickle of blood slowly dripping from Jax's nose. For a split second the man seemed honestly surprised about his own violent act and looked at the blood on his knuckles in disgust.
      "For you and your useless freind, I hope you are right. Still, if you hear rumors spreading, even if it's just a teeny tiny whisper I want you to take care of it. Are we clear, Jax?", Lance grunted.
      Jax pressed the back of his hand against ist bloody nose. "Crystal..."
      "Good boy.", praised Lance and dismissed everyone with a wave of his hand.
      Jax felt the sudden urge to vomit all over his precious marble tiles.

      The sun had almost disappeard below the horizon when Jax entered the playgound.
      His searching gaze drifted over the swings and sandboxes, over peeled paint on cracking wood and the illusion of a peacful place for happy families. Obviously the place was getting old but was well cared for. Slowly he walked over to the fort-like structure and tilted his head back. The first thing he saw, were swinging and forbidden pale legs to long to be legal. His eyes snapped up to the playfull sound of a girls voice. He didn't bother to cover the swell of his nose and the ugly ugly bruises
      "Peeking? Me? What kind of pervert do you think I am? Nothin' i havn't seen before.", Jax mumbled in his sandpaper rough growl.
      There was absolutly no tiny smile threatening the grim corner of his lips.
      Jax looked ridiculous due to his size climbing up the wooden ladder, clearley constructed for kids only, to the plattform where Ginny waited. He had known instantly as he had noticed the unknown numer, that the petite girl had written the message.
      With a grunt Jax sat down next to the fragile form of her body wich seemed even more frail beside him and wrapped up in the oversized leather jacket. It looked better on Ginny then on himself, he decided without blinking. The girl crawled under his skin within seconds and he still didn't know what to think of it. Maybe he was so touch starved already that he got careless.
      Mostly silent he listened to Ginny.
      At the sight of the little black coin he snorted with a grin. "Nah. Keep it. I'm a lost cause."
      Still he got a cigarette and lighter out of his pocket and first lighted one for Ginny handing it to her before getting one for himself.
      Her boyfriend? Jax laughed roughly at that und nearly dropped the glimming cigarette. Honestly? It could be worse. But Ginny wasn't his girlfriend and he wasn't her boyfriend. They weren't destined for a happily ever after and if Ginny was half as clever as Jax suspected: She would stay the hell away from him.
      The tall black haired dealer shook his head.
      "No. Havn't heard from her either. The wasn't at the box club this afternoon.", Jax answered with a serious glint in his eyes. "Listen, I'm sorry for what happend to you friend. I didn't know Cami well, but she seemed to be a nice girl."
      He stared at her intently, his hands wrapped around the smooth leather, trying to form the right words without exposing himself.
      "Why did you contact me? Just to hand me back my jacket?"
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”
    • A cigarette between her fingers was a good idea. Ginny took it with a brief nod before putting the filter on her lips. “The desire to see a handsome face probably won't cut it, right?” she smirked an answer to his question. It was obvious that the girl had more on her mind than to chit chat with a stranger. The smoke vanished into the wind as she blew it out her mouth while her hazel eyes watched it fade away. “I didn’t know her well. Ava was very close to Cami even though she wouldn’t tell me anything about it.” Ginny whispered into thin air. “I just can't shake the feeling that this whole situation is not adding up. If I know one thing about that Mendes girl, it's that she's always the party pooper. She was never mixing opiates and even if she did the doses she took were always so small… It would have never killed her.” her voice cracked as if it was her fault.
      “I sat there only a few steps away from her, we took the same shit, same amount - if the drugs killed her, we would all be dead. Since you are the only person answering my texts I have to ask you first. What the hell am I missing? It just doesn't make any sense…” she gave him a brief glance, fixing his blue eyes that looked terrible by the way. Ginny knew better than to ask dumb questions about what had happened to him or his nose. It hurt her to see him in pain. That's why she looked away again.

      “You are too handsome to be forgotten yet people might be too afraid to root you out. Freddy on the other Hand…” Many words aren't needed to get where she was going. The redhead left quite an impression on the party. "I'm sure that your Boss wouldn't be too happy to hear that one of his rookies screwed up, especially one that was under your watch.” Ginny no longer cared to make a secret out of her intentions. She blew out smoke again before she continued. “Figuring out what really happened is gonna help you get the Police off your lead and I want answers. So I thought… two heads are better than one.” she shrugged, giving Jax a soft smile.
      “I guess helping Ava to find some closure adds up as well. And I need a whole lot of your stuff to keep me sane while attending NA meetings.” Ginny chuckled, hiding away the nightmares she had that night. She couldn't care less about her attendance streak. Those dreams weren't about to disappear and if Ginny needed one thing desperately it was her good night sleep to keep her on her feet managing that shit show of her life. “You tried to save me even though you didn’t know me. I guess I’m just trying to return the favor…so you in?”
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • "Flattery won't get you anywhere, sweetheart.", Jax read her face like an open book.
      Within seconds he knew that she wanted to ask for a favor. The look on her face was painfully familiar to him, it was that odd grin halfway between a shaky smile and an crooked grin that meant to hide the growing uncertainty. Jax' face hardened the longer he listened to Ginny. What the girl asked of him wasn't only bold but also quiet dangerous. With an ice cold stare he looked down on Ginny.
      "Freddy... is none of your business. You'd better wipe that name out of your pretty little head.", Jax said. "I appraciate the thought, but you're a little late for that."
      With the tip of his index finger he pointed to his battered nose with the ugly bruises. "Do you think I ran into a brick wall?"
      Jax got up with a sudden move and swung himself over the low railing of the wooden castle into the sand below. The movement looked flawless like a stray cat jumping from a high building an landing on all fours with ease. He put on his jacket an looked up at Ginny with intent. Very, very slowly he approached her and her swinging feet high in the air. He reached out towards her pale legs and encircled the fragile ankles with his rough hands.
      "I'm serious. Stay out of this." Jax demanded. "The people I work for don't take jokes lightly. You can't possibly ask me to rat my own friend out. The law ain't a friend of mine, but I'm not a traitor. I owe them. I can't help you."
      Almost gently he applied some pressure to her ankles, wich he still held in his grip.
      "Do you want to risk that Ava loses another friend to this?", he asked and knew exactly that he played unfair now.
      It sounded like a hidden threat. Miller had told him to get rid of any evidence, but would he really demand to kill a harmless girl?
      "By the way...Do you have any proof that Freddy has anything to do with the death of your friend?"
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 2 mal editiert, zuletzt von Winterhauch ()

    • “I would never ask anyone to betray the people they care about… Trust is fragile, difficult to build and easy to break.” Her head remained on the horizon for a few moments longer, when Jax decided to jump off the wooden castle. Growing up in a world where values such as trust were hard to find, she learned the hard way that it's always the things you love the most that destroy you. Almost drifting off to distant memory Jaxs’ grip brought her back into reality. In his warm touch it was easy to tell that he had worked with his hands in life. His palms were rough, had edges and were nothing compared to the soft baby skin of hers. Ginny looked down to him, listened but shook his hand off of her as soon as he had finished his little game of intimidation. With a light push from the ledge she jumped down, letting her dress fly high which revealed the tights beneath. It covered certain areas just enough to kill the joy of some perverts. They were a light nude tone but still didn't match her porcelain skin.

      Catching herself she was angled toward him. “If you can tell me with a sertanty that whatever happened back there wasn’t some random accident, I’ll stay put.” she shrugged
      “Don't you realize that if Camis death had anything to do with the drugs we all took, it's you who handed them over. Making you a puppet in someone's sick game while you might have handed them right into Avery's hands. As long as we don't know what happened exactly we can't tell if it was just bad luck or if someone's life is still in danger.” The fear of talking too much, trusting him too easily had to wait. This dangerously good looking man was her best and only shot. “But who am I to judge right? I’m just a harmless little girl.” the words ringed like a melody in her voice as if she really was nothing more than a fragile blonde. As if butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth. There were only a few inches separating them. Ginny found herself drawn to him. It was the only logical explanation to why she often was so close to male drug dealer she barely knew. “I’m getting my answers; with or without you. I’d just rather have you by my side rather than behind my back.” her voice was hardly a whisper but sufficient enough for him to hear. Turning her around she was about to leave. Her steps left an imprint in the sand till she hesitated and stopped. Loose fingers formed into fists while a sigh came out of her lips. As she turned to face Jax her fingers immediately reached for his face. His chin in particular. Gently she pushed his jaw to one side followed by the other while her hazel eyes were focused on the bridge of his nose. After she gained a good look, Ginny stopped her motion facing him directly, switching her glare to his eyes. Hypnotic ice blue irises brighter even than the sky. Then she let go of him. “Keep an eye on the swelling. In about 4 days it should wear off. You should be able to tell if it's fractured by then. Ice the area to decrease swelling but no longer than twenty minutes. Constant cold exposure will only damage your skin. After the first two days, switch to warm compresses. It helps open your blood vessels which will drain fluid and decrease puffiness.” She looked away with a hint of embarrassment. It was better to be underestimated, that's why she hated to share her thoughts or any knowledge. Looking at his bruises she wished to touch his skin again, as if her simple touch could keep the pain at bay.
      “Don't get yourself killed, boyfriend.” she smiled softly at the thought of them as a couple. Jax seemed more like the type of guy who leads girls on just for a quick intercourse. The type that tells you he's really into you but doesn't want to deal with all the relationship bullshit so you should just stay friends with benefits. Her judgment could be wrong but the blonde knew what she wanted and Ginny never went for the nice guys that would treat her like a precious flower. His reality was probably too risky to get attached to anyone, dragging them into his darkness.That stubborn thing preferred the thrill going down her spine when a man approached her without fear. Feeling their breath on her body as they would break the distance. What's a girl gonna tell ya? She always loved playing with fire and just meeting Jax’ eyes gave her goosebumps.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • You know better, babe, you know better, babe
      Than to smile at me, smile at me like that
      You know better, babe, you know better, babe
      Than to hold me just, hold me just like that

      [...]
      Don't let me in with no intention to keep me
      Jesus Christ, don't be kind to me
      Honey, don't feed me, I will come back


      [Hozier - It will come back]
      ____________________________________________________


      Jesus, cross my heart and hope to die.
      Jax really, really tried not to look as miles and miles of perfect porclain skin were revealed to the dim light of the setting sun. He could still feel the comfortable warmth of her skin right beneath his fingertips. A slight tingly feeling burned under the pads of his fingers and he struggeled slightly to keep himself from reaching out for Ginny again because he hoped the unnerving feeling whould stop as soon as he touched her. The revelation hit him that he should never have come here. Hell, he should have never picked up that damn phone call.
      A bittersweet smile curled the corners of his mouth.
      It was the kind of smile that was sad and determined at the same time, like he didn't know how to smile with honesty at all and it came of a bit too crooked, too serious. It was utterly perfect for a person like Jax - who was far too young to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders.
      Could he look her straight in the eye and claim that the idiot Freddy had nothing to do with Cami's death? Could he tell her, that Freddy secretly sneaked some narcotics and knockout drops into Cami's drinks to loosen her up? The mixture was the deadly cocktail that killed the girl in the first place. Jax knew all that, but could her tell her?
      "I can't.", he said with a sandpaper rasp of a voice. "And I can't help you either." Not without putting you, Ava or everyone else in danger, went unsaid. It wasn't the first time something went completely wrong but this time it affected someone Jax actually cared about. And he didn't care about a lot of things in his rough life. Least of all about other people. However Ava didn't deserve this tragedy. Believable or not, the cheeky young woman was like a little sister to him and he the failure of an older brother. The wayward son no one wanted, in the end not even his mother.
      Already searching for another cig to smoke he didn't noticed that Ginny changed her mind and came back towards him.
      In prospective it was highly possible that Jax would deny he flinched at the surprising touch of tender fingertips on his stubbled jaw line. He was letting his guard down to easily around the fragile looking girl. Ginny even had the guts to mock him about that. A behavior he found more appealing than he would like to admit. The hint of embarrassment on her face caught him off guard yet again. Why was she uncomfortable with sharing that she really had something up her sleeve? Did she really prefer to be mistaken for a brainless, pretty doll to fool around with?
      "Careful, sweetheart", Jax wispered. And he didn't meant the physical pain she probably caused with her ministration.
      Ginny should've known better than to treat a guy like him with kindness. The moment he got used to it, he would never let her go. It would become an addiction worser than any chemicals or narcotics. He would be addicted to her.
      Jax knew the look in her beautiful eyes, the way she gazed at the rough edges and the piercing glimpse of his cold appearing eyes. Apparently Ginny was getting lost in the stupid imagination, what he possibly could do to her. She liked the idea of danger a little bit to much, maybe the idea of saving him from his dark path. They all fell in love with the idea to uncover the good hearted, hurt boy they all thought was closed of under layers of layers of hard shells, cold stares and a pitiful limping of a tragic injury.
      Until they realized it wasn't that easy and came to the conclusionen Jax wasn't worth the trouble.
      In the end, Jax wasn't one to save. He just needed her to mind her own business and keep her distance. He just needed her to...
      Nevertheless, without thinking he took her thin, boney wrist and pressed the cold fingertips of her to the swollen, black and blue brindge of his nose.
      Just a second longer would be fine. Just one second.
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 3 mal editiert, zuletzt von Winterhauch ()

    • "Some days I go in like a killer
      Put my guard up high and walk out with a shimmer
      Look 'em in the eye without distraction, I'm a person of attraction, I'm a winner


      Life is a balancing act
      You're bad at it and that is a fact
      I'm crazy trying not to be crazy."

      [Oh Wonder - Dinner]
      ____________________________________

      As her fingers met the bruised warm skin, Ginny couldn’t help herself but to inhale sharply.
      She didn't mean to hurt him yet she let him guide her touch. "Sadistic much?" she thought aloud, raising an eyebrow with the hint of a smile. The troubled soul knew how relieving pain could be. Rather strange for people who never experienced it; the deep urge to throw fists or scream. Anything that would let out the energy building up on one's chest. Cherishing the pain because it meant that you haven't gone numb yet. Her heartbeat accelerated just by meeting his body. Clearing her throat as she felt the heat rising into her cheeks her focus went to his beautiful deep set of eyes. God she wanted him. Not some freaking prince charming who would come and save her from that miserable life of hers, but him. Someone who knew the pain of a world falling apart upon your shoulders. Ginny wasn't looking for a happy ending, she knew better than that. Life has always just given her lemons to squeeze the Juice right into her eyes while others enjoyed the ice cold lemonade. In him she found someone she wasn't scared to look in the eyes. Afraid of what he might think of her. That she was too broken, too skinny, too loud, too quiet, too Ginny. She was nothing more than a mess hidden behind platinum blonde curtain bangs and for the first time it didn't seem to matter. Everyone else would have grabbed her for a night fling and left her cold with nothing to give. Jax' glare seemed different. He didn't seem like the type to try and change her. Put her in preppy clothes to hide all the scars that covered parts of her body. He was just as messed up as she was, if not worse but it was not a competition really.
      She stood there like a lunatic with a slightly open mouth while staring at the blue skin that her fingers carefully caressed. "It should not be broken but you still should see a doctor. I'm no match." She finally let go of him after Ginny totally forgot his pain even existed under her touch. The tingle of his warm body on her fingertips let her mind drift off to far places. Hypnotic. She hated the fact that she licked her lips before shutting her mouth. "Make him pay for what he did." her soft voice went off as she met the ice blue again. Slipping her hand into his pocket Ginny grabbed his pack of cigarettes to put one between his lips. Then she allowed herself to take one as well before she came closer to nearly touch his end of the cig with her own. Eventually he would understand that she was waiting for him to light them up. "Let him regret that he laid a hand on you or maybe I will do it myself since I will keep an eye on you and your people from now on." The smoke tried to escape her mouth while she was talking, only to be followed by another breath of the toxic nicotine. There was no point in hiding her intentions. If one word described her good it would be her stubbornness. Answers awaited her.
      With the cig between her lips, her free hands went back to his pocket to return the pack to its rightful owner. How badly she wanted to hold on a little longer. Feel his presence for a few more seconds. But eventually she had to let go of him. Damn it, Ginny, get it together. Once she returned his belongings, the Blonde stepped away. He had robbed her of the ability to think for long enough now. It was time for her to go before she would embarrass herself even more.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • "No," Jax answered with a chuckle. He actually chuckled. "Honestly, your fingers are colder than ice cubes right now."
      The breathy and amused sound was so strange in his own ears, that he nearly failed to recognize his own voice. When was the last time he genuinely smiled or even laughed until his stomach began to hurt and he had no air left in his straining lungs. Jax wasn't laughing right now, but the cheeky comment earned the fragile girl in front of him a rare smile. Suddenly Jax looked years younger, the features of his face a tiny bit softer than before. He looked more his ages now.
      Ginny didn't recoil from his touch and it was truely rare not to see fear or disgust in a person's eyes that Jax stared at the pale young woman like she was f*cking unicorn or some other fantastical creature from a storybook. As a matter of fact she unexpectedly licked her lips and stared up at him, like she wanted to devour him as a midnight snack after she helped herself to another cigarette. Without hesitation she slipped her soft hand into his pockets. He had never seen such open desire towards his person, that he gazed at her totally flabbergasted. So much for the big bad wolf...
      The next words out of her lovely mouth brought Jax back to the hard reality.
      A familiar hardness twisted his face back into the well-known mask with a set of ice cold, blue eyes. It seemed that in this second he remembered who he was und where he came from. Jax pressed his lips into a bitter line. He had been distracted by a pretty face and beautiful, radiant eyes. It was pathetic.
      The quiet laugh sounded utterly hollow.
      "You? You want to look out for me? Bullshit. You have no idea what you're talking about, sweetheart.", Jax said with a stern expression. "For the last time: Stay out of this. It was an accident, get that into your pretty little head. You're smart, Ginny, maybe to smart for your own good. You should know better."
      The warm and cozy spell that had surrouned them on this empty playground bursted like a bubble.
      "Stay away from Freddy. And stay the hell away from me."

      ______________________________________________________________________

      Heavy breathing and a rapid heartbeat filled his ears.
      The blood rushed through his veins, tingling hot under his skin, while he slammed his fists mercilessly into the quivering punching back. Jax blocked out every distracting noise of other people in the old and dusty boxing hall. Sasha, a middle-aged woman and trainer with a high pony tale swinging in her neck led a few new students through the place. He knew kids like that: No home. Aggressive behavior. A last chance before juvie.
      It was one week since the odd conversation on the kids playground.
      Ginny hadn't tried to contact him a second time and for some reason that left an uncomfortable sour taste on his tongue like liquid acid. He remembered her open gaze, the casualness of her hands on his skin and clothes like she touched him on a regular basis. The fleeting moment she bit er rosy lips.
      The next punch hit the punching back so hard, that the chaines hanging from the ceiling protested under the forcefull movement.
      Jax' came to a halt and wheezed through is still slightly swollen nose. The dark blotches on the bridge of his nose more a colorful green and yellow now that it healed a bit. It wasn't broken, but hadn't needed a doctor for that.
      He wore a black tanktop and matching long, black and loose-fitted pants and simple trainers on his feet. His jet black hair was tight up in his usual unruly bun. A few strands stuck to the sweaty forehead.
      Due to the lack of covering clothes it was easy to see that jax was well trained with an athletic build. Not in the bulky way more like a slender and agile hunter. There was no mistaking that he owned a certain strength but his advantage in combat was clearly his speed. He was nimble on his feet und fast in throwing well placed punches. Brutal strength alone never guaranteed an easy win. One hit, carefully placed, could break a bone much easier than a thoughtless swing.
      It was nearly 8 p.m. and Jax stopped believing that Ava would show up for her regular training with him. He was worried. Not, that he would ever say that out loud. Carefully he stretched out his bad leg and winced because the old injury bothered him more thise days.
      He sighed.
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 1 mal editiert, zuletzt von Winterhauch ()

    • Noticing the subtle change in his glimpse, Ginny couldn’t help but ask herself what just happened. The softness in his face, the little wrinkles at the corner of his eyes and those perfectly white teeth disappeared within seconds as if it was not her place to see him in that way. But she loved every bit of it! Seeing a side that wouldn’t fit the cast of his dark shadow creating a haunting aura gave her the satisfaction of a glimmer of hope. Maybe, in another universe, all that pitch-black parts of his soul were aching for the light hers had left to share. At least it would explain why the hell Jax agreed to meet her in the first place.
      Instead of taking the switch in his tone personally she kept her glaze on ice-blue. Ginny knew better than to get offended by his words. Jax’s sudden change in mood should set an alarm off, let her know that she really was playing with fire again, but instead that naive brain of hers wanted to explore further. As in the excitement of running into the ocean in order to figure out how deep it really was, without knowing how to swim. Drowning in his blue seemed like a valid option. Unfortunately this kid had lived with people far more dangerous - or so she thought - shared a roof, had to play pretend, be a happy family with filthy hands that longed for more than that. Some even made her call them daddy, a command she learned to obey to spare her from worse. Otherwise the blonde would be disciplined since she was nothing more than a spoiled little brat, who needed to learn her place in that house or whatever consequences they thought were appropriate. When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. However, if life gives you shitwholes and bastards to live with, you learn to read them. Look out for signs, to study the room for its thick air just to find a way to ease the tension. Watch every movement as it goes, a slight curl in the corner of one's lips, the shift in someone's weight, clenching of muscles - everything that could give her the advantage of a head start. Knowing someone’s next move before they knew it themselves. Being able to know when to get the hell out of a situation or whether it was still safe to be around, saved her life several times. Of course she was no master in that matter but she felt confident enough about her judgment. It spared her a couple broken bones here and there; not before taking the hit several times, since it costs you a great part to actually figure out how many buttons one was allowed to push. Anyhow, these days seemed to be a long lost memorie by now. Her family reunion made sure of that and left her with a skill she wished to never have obtained. Just like scarred skin these things stick with you, presumably forever. Jax was no harm. She gave him the benefit of a doubt.
      “Have you ever considered that pushing people away will not keep them safe but sometimes do the complete opposite?” her voice shrinking into a whisper while her smile grew bigger as it faded from Jax’s lips. Ginny could smile for both of them, she knew how to put on a show but really it was easy to find a reason to smile at him. She immediately thought of her sister. Ginny was one to talk, always pushing everyone away as soon as they got too close. That's exactly why she knew what damage it could make.
      “By the way I guess I’ve got you all figured out.” her grin revealed her white teeth as she stepped away a little. Distance would do them good. Her brain nearly forgot how to function properly standing that close to the object of her desire, feeling his breath on her skin. “Your smile makes you look younger. You can’t let people mistake you for a teenage boy, right? Better lock that cute smile of yours away behind deep wrinkles.” Yet again she pushed her luck, possibly taking it a step too far with her jokes. How badly she wanted to see that smile again. A split second would do the trick…maybe just this once?
      “Thanks again, for meeting me, Jax.” With her cute angelic smile she slipped away back into the darkness of the night on her way home where she could dream of ice-blue and jet-black.

      _______________

      All the nights she layed in bed one face haunted her dreams. Over and over and over again. Yet the girl obeyed his advice. Well, at least partially. Ginny stayed away from him but not from that unsolved mystery she set her mind up to solve. Talking to Ava wasn’t as revealing as she hoped to be but it gave her a point to start at. All that digging, asking questions, rose to her friends' attention - not in a good way. Presumably because Avery didn't like the idea of losing someone close to her again. Even though they didn’t talk a lot about Jax, really his name was like a spell none of both dared to cast, the petite one could feel her anger, not able to quite tell why. It was all the more surprising when the masculine lady came up with the idea of taking Ginny to their gym. Sparring sessions with Jax - what a delight, she thought. Getting asked to stay away only to show up in his territory where he would throw punches her way while she desperately attempts to hide her slim silhouette behind a sandbag was not one of her dream scenarios. Yet excitement rose in her chest just thinking about seeing him again with a decent excuse to do so. Ava was the one to blame after all!
      “Getting rusty I see?” Ava approached Jax up and ready to fight. Her big smile blew all the doubs away. Maybe she wasn’t angry with him and Ginny's judgment was a little blinded after all.
      The blonde stayed behind, trying to a- figure out how exactly to put on these bandages on her knuckles and b- not to stare at the muscular frame of Jax. Her eyes tracked every movement, took in how incredibly attractive he was, covered in nothing but a tank top and his tattoos. Black ink that matched his hair color perfectly as if they extracted the ink straight from the root of one of his strands. Breathing deeply through her nose she tried to calm her racing heart. How could one forget how consuming his presence was to be around. Her eyes couldn’t help but search for him to meet them. Only by the time a tall hispanic looking guy approached the damsel in distress Ginny finally put her mind straight upon the matter of her twinkling hands that tried to fumble the fabric around her hand. “Nice of your friend to leave you up to it.” he said smirking while his eyes locked on her dainty fingers. “No, Ava showed me back at her place over and over again how to do it. I guess I’m just not really talented, is all.” Afraid to meet his eyes, Ginny only dared a volatile glimpse at his loyal brown eyes, taking in the long, dark curls that framed them. The heat in her cheeks rose from a soft pink to a dark crimson as he politely started to wrap her hands in bandages. “Thanks.” Nothing more than a whisper escaped her lips. Interacting with strangers wasn’t her strong suit. She hated attention from people, she didn’t quite feel comfortable around. Don’t be such a prude. He’s helping. A nice guy. Nothing more, nothing less. A failed attempt to sooth her racing pulse, while taking deep breaths as he showed her to the free hanging heavy bag.
      “Shoot your shot.” again he smiled in such a polite way it made her stomach ache with embarrassment. With a nod the woman faced the black, shiny leather like fabric and tried a hook. The chain that suspended it on the ceiling began to rustle, lightly not even bothering to move the bag an inch. What else did she expect? As a dancer her body was used to move beautifully, solidifying emotions into motions not to throw punches. Arms like toothpicks one might be afraid of them breaking as soon as her fist met the punching bag.
      “Well, I suck.” she giggled - not in a fun way but more in an insecure one. Pablo, as he introduced himself before, shared a laugh louder than necessary, making her cheeks burn even more. Again her eyes searched for Jax. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You just need to learn the right technique.” He proceeded to slightly brush Ginny to the side so he could show her the proper movement. His whole body was in motion, gaining power out of it instead of just swinging his arm. But still Ginny was stiff as a cold piece of metal when she tried to replicate him. Again. And again.
      “Okay maybe try this.” towering behind her he put his hands on her skin tight covered hips. Picking cycling shorts and a matching bra as a boxing outfit suddenly felt wrong. With good intentions he guided her movements, twisted her hips to gain momentum, brushing his fingers lightly on her skin, letting her butt wiggle just inches away from his middle. Her stiff body hardened under the unexpected touch. Even with his shirt between them she could feel his warmth that breathing became something unfamiliar. Her mind began to race a thousand miles per minute. Ginny should appreciate his help, the attention to her flaws in order to come back stronger but her blurry vision only focused on the nightmares as her eyes tried to blink back to focus. Irritation flickered deep within her even biting her inner cheek couldn’t stop the flashbacks that made nausea tease her throat. All she wished for was for it to be over but her body wouldn’t move.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

      Dieser Beitrag wurde bereits 1 mal editiert, zuletzt von Michiyo ()

    • A well-known voice echoed through the boxing hall with its concrete walls and prominent tears in the ceiling.
      Jax turned aorund and his normally stern face split into a striking grin from one ear to the other. And while it did, he remembered the words Ginny had thrown at him on the playground days ago. The accusation of hiding behind a brooding expression and a coldhearted stare. Little did she know, that Jax couldn't afford to let people in easily. It was too dangerous to allow another careless weakness. He risked enough for beeing there for Ava when the girl had needed him all this time ago and now he couldn't let her go. Ava reminded him of his lost humantiy and that there were still a few good people out there, people worth saving. Her smile lifted a heavy weight from his shoulders and gave Jax the certainty, that everything was still fine between them. For a few nerve warcking moments he had feared her anger more then any punishment that the one and only Lance Miller could've come up with. No pain would've been more hurtfull than Avas disgust and fury. And still, he reminded himself of who he was and what he did for a living.
      The grin faded and turned into a thin line of a smile but the mischievous glint in his ice blue eyes stayed right in place.
      "I'll show you rusty...Hope you*re ready to beg for mercy, little padawan?", he said and greated her with a slight bump of their bandaged knuckels.
      The look in his eyes darkened when he spotted Ginny lingering in the background obviously struggeling with the bandages. Her outfit was more than questionable and much too revealing for his taste for the given circumstances of a box studio. As expected, it didn't take long for the first unlucky candidate to approach the new girl. Jax could barley hide the urge to bare his teeth like a mad dog. Firstly because he really, really hated the way Pablo touched the petite blonde like he did that a thousand times a day, too familiar and intimate for his liking, and secondly because of the uncomfortable look on her pale face. Everyone even from miles away could've seen the sheer terror in her wide but beautiful eyes.
      "Why did you bring her here?", Jax asked with annoyance in his gravely and rough voice like stone grinding on stone.
      This place was his sanctury. It was the only retreat from an everyday life filled with cold brutality and hot blood, the shady jobs he did for Miller without question. Jax was clearly aware of the bitter irony. But the anger disappeared with every twitch of the delicate young woman under the unwanted hands of a stranger. Every fiber in her body screamed from trauma most people couldn't even imagine.
      Jax knew.
      The uncontrollable but subtle shaking, the stiffness of her whole frame and the unfocused glance of pure horror no one else could ever see. It wasn't the first time Jax asked himself if the toughness was just a careful rehearsed act. The need to appear strong and independent like nothing could every hurt you was a need he understood perfectly.
      Silent with a brief turn of his head in the direction of the pale girl he turned Avas attention to her friend she left behind at the other end of the boxing hall. Not a word left his lips as he turned around. His footsteps were absolutly noiseless as he creeped up behind Pablos back like a hunter stalking its prey. Out of nowhere a heavry, calloused hand landed on the right shoulder on the hispanic guy.
      "Sasha needs help with the newbies.", Jax stated with a matter of fact tone.
      Jax didn't left him the benefit of a doubt that this wasn't up for a discussion. He might as well have said: F*ck off.
      After a fleeting glance to Ava he took the position of Pablo behind the obviously scared girl without laying a single finger on her delicate body, his body heat the only constant of his lingering presence. Jax didn't asked what had shaken her up so much, he just stood at her back, breathing steadily und keeping away any worried questions from other people in the training area with an icey stare.
      "Breath, sweetheart.", he whispered calmly. "You*re possibly having a panic attack right now. Listen to my breahting. Deep breaths through your nose.In and out."
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”
    • Don't be that way, fall apart twice a day. I just wish you could feel what you say.
      Show, never tell but I know you too well got a mood that you wish you could sell.
      If teardrops could be bottled there'd be swimming pools filled by models, told "a tight dress is what makes you a whore".
      If "I love you" was a promise would you break it, if you're honest?
      Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before: I don't wanna be you, anymore.

      Hands getting cold, losing feeling is getting old. Was I made from a broken mold?
      Hurt, I can't shake, we've made every mistake - only you know the way that I break.
      [idontwannabeyouanymore - Billie Eilish]

      Avas brows raised in confusion as the annoyance in Jax’ tone was hard to ignore. Her bright smile to his cheerful joke vanished into thin air. “Who Ginny?” Normally their little chit-chat didn’t affect their session, that's why the girl tried to stay focused instead of looking over to her friend. “I know it sounds ridiculous,” she threw a jab in his direction before coming to stand. “But I couldn't stand the thought of losing her too. It wouldn't harm her to know how to defend herself.” Avery explained herself a little at ave that Jax didn’t want the blonde near. Only when he guided her attention to the damsel in distress Ava figured why. As she managed to take a step in Ginny's direction her feet immediately stopped as soon as she noticed Jax’s movement. Noiseless like a big cat prowling to its prey he took care of the situation - of her! That intimidating aura everyone else seemed to catch except for her, well she finally came to witness it. It even kept her from approaching, instead the buzz cutted observed the scene come to play.

      He was finally gone. "Breath, sweetheart." Of course it was Jax’s voice that let her gasp for air. Thanks to him Pablo was gone. Lost in thought Ginny didn't even realize that her hand went to meet his palm to keep her shaky legs from breaking under the weight of the flashing pictures. Holding onto him as if she feared falling to her knees without something to keep her steady, the cold fingers lingered for his warm touch. Following the orders, her lungs filled with oxygen. Breathing in and out. Again. Over and over till the tears in those hazel eyes began to fade. Gently playing with his fingers hers stayed in motion as if to soothe his restlessness or really her own. Snapping out of it her mind clicked. Ginny immediately let go of his hand to wipe away the evidence of her watering glaze before she could face him. Though, really she didn’t even think of facing him. Not like that, not like this. Not as a pathetic little girl who needed saving. What the hell was she doing? There was no way that he cared for Ginny, knew how to read her body nor her mind. The only logical conclusion was that her delusional brain started to trick her into believing that there was someone out there to be found, who could save her. "Shit. Sorry, I-" muffled words ran over pale lips before a decent sentence could come to mind. "I'm good." the blonde assured him after clearing her throat from that disgusting ball of emotions that made it hard to speak. Lies. All of it. It has been years since she last felt nearly alright at all. That random guy was a little too friendly to the wrong person. An Untroubled soul would have told him to get lost, get his hands off or just that they preferred to not get physical with a stranger, she didn't want to touch. Really it probably wasn't his fault. Ginny would not blame him for the scars other men left behind. Maybe if her path would have been another, the situation would be different. That poor girl wouldn't freeze under a stranger's touch. If only Memories could be erased or someone would have stood up for her while living under one roof with people who should never ever have kids of their own. “You’ll have Ava worried sick if you don’t go back to her.” a faint smile brushed upon her lips, while she turned her head slightly to look over her shoulder. Ginny would not turn around. It would be too embarrassing! Jax already warned her to stay away from the bad guys, yet she couldn’t even stand to be around a nice guy without twitching.

      Dazed by whatever she gained a glimpse from, Avery stood there like an idiot. The two of them together resembled so much more than strangers. What the hell did she miss? The jet black creature she knew never opened up to anyone. But seeing him with Ginny brought a side of him to daylight that Ava was not expecting to see. Not with her.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • Without hesitation Jax grasped the trembling hand. Cold fingers sought their way between his owen in a desprate grip onto reality and he could only guess what horrible scenes played out in her mind. His hold on her hand was surprisingly gentle like he feared to crush the delicate bones. Though Ginny's skin was cool to the touch, a tingling warmth spread from beneath his fingertips up his tattooed arm. Up close he could count the tiny freckles on the pale skin of her slender neck. A lovely and sweet scent lingered in the air between them, probably a perfume or the last remains of the shampoo she used at home. It was intoxicating.
      "Shit. Sorry...-" Jax blinked and let her hand go. His gaze wandered to the abandoned punching bag.
      "Ava can handle herself.", he shrugged. "She doesn't need me for a babysitter."
      Jax didn't mean to be overly rude but Ava wasn't a fragile princess anymore. Not since she started training with Jax, anyway. Maybe the better decision was to resume his practice with Ava but he felt the weird and overprotective urge to keep Ginny close - like a predetor shielding its prey from any possible rival.
      Carefull he shifted his weight to his good leg and directed Ginnys attention back to the punching back with a curt nod. Jax didn't ask for permission as he tapped the inside of her right ankle with the toe of his sneaker. It was the only touch he allowed at the moment. He was intended on guiding her running thoughts to a different task.
      "Widen you stance. You need the balance.", he wispered close to her ear. "Now raise you hands. Don't enclose your thumb with your other fingers...unless you intend to break it. Most of your opponents will be bigger and stronger than you. Your only true advantage is possibly speed not raw strength."
      Jax was like a lingering shadow at her back who kept everyone else at a distance. A short glimpse to the buzz cutted girl was enough to let her know that everything was under controll and her friend was mostly okay. A crooked grin in the corner of his mouth and a second nod beckoned her over.
      "Try it." Jax demaned and took a step back. He didn't need her elbow between his rips.
      A very dark and low chuckle climbed up his throat at Ginnys first try. Even as the took a swing with full force the punching back didn't move an inch.
      "That...was pathetic.", he rumbled, a sound underlined with a lingering chuckle.
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”
    • There′s something about you.
      What about a hit?
      What about a hit of your look?
      Start to shake.
      Start to shake with your hand.
      What of a click?
      What of a click, are you a freak?
      You turn and face me.
      Maybe this time I′ll choose.
      Closer. Closer. Closer.
      [Something about you - Hayden James]


      A whirlwind of emotions blew through Ginny, like a storm of feelings that couldn't easily be stilled. The rough texture of Jax's hand, the touch that had once seemed so foreign, was now a surprising comfort. His fingertips had left traces of warmth on her skin, filling her with a tingling sensation she couldn't comprehend. The scent between them covered her, a scent she vaguely recognized as her own. It was a dangerous drug she couldn't help but surrender to. But just when she started to sink into the comfort of his presence, his words pushed her back to reality. Her heart pounded against her chest as she raised her gloved fists, pointed towards the unyielding bag that Jax indicated. His brief touch on her ankle was another small shock, an unfamiliar warmth that she quickly brushed off. Jax’s foot tapping against her ankle, his whispered instructions, it all grounded her. Even with his looming shadow behind her, and his piercing eyes upon her, she did not feel weakened. Instead, it was an odd reassurance. Jax's closeness was a strange comfort, his low voice vibrating against her back as he spoke. Even though his words stung, his firm, instructive tone brought an unexpected hush. It was a voice that didn't allow for hesitation or second guessing, and it was a direction she direly needed at that moment. Feeling the initial awkwardness of her stance, she made an attempt to adjust her feet as he advised, focusing on the distant feeling of balance that started to set in. Her hands went up, remembering not to enclose her thumb, she made a fist. “Guess speed's all I've got then,” she said, her voice flimsy as she tried to lighten the mood. But it felt like a weak joke. Something about Jax's demeanor made it clear that this was no laughing matter, not for him. When she punched, the lack of effect was almost comical to her effort. She winced at the recoil from the bag, the stinging sensation that buzzed up her arm, her whole body screaming that this wasn't a good idea. Her lips pressed together at his comment, the bitterness of the words softened by the low chuckle. His amusement was a strange comfort in the situation, as if his chuckle provided a cocoon around them, where her pathetic attempt could be just that, without further consequence. She felt the heat rise to her cheeks. Pathetic? She could take that. But it would only fuel her, make her strive harder, push further. She wasn't some delicate flower to be coddled. She had more fight in her than anyone would ever know. She was not a book to be judged by its cover nor her petite exterior. The blonde wasn't some dainty princess, she wasn't fragile. She had strength within her, though it wasn't physical. Ginny inhaled a shaky breath, her brows furious as she turned to look at him. Meeting his gaze was tough, but she did, holding onto whatever pride was left in her. “I could use your body as a punching bag, bet I’ll make you move. See how pathetic my fists will feel?” Her voice was quiet but firm, determination creeping into her tone with a faint smile. A challenge? Fine. It wasn't about proving something to him anymore, it was about proving something to herself. She was done being the scared little girl. She couldn't be. Resetting her stance, she took another deep breath before throwing another punch towards the bag.

      Ava watched the scene from the corner of her eye, her heart aching. It was an intimate moment between Ginny and Jax, one that Ava felt like an intruder witnessing. Watching Ginny throw another punch, the buzz cutted folded her arms across her chest and bit her lip. It was painfully obvious that she was out of her element. With a shake of her head, she returned to her own training. She could only hope that Jax would be patient with Ginny, that he would understand the layers of pain that were barely hidden beneath the surface.

      They continued training, round after round, until sweat was trickling down Ginny's forehead and her arms felt like they were made of lead. She was gasping for air, her body crying out for rest. The adrenaline that had been rushing through her veins was slowly bowing out, leaving her drained and exhausted. Yet Ginny found a strange sort of satisfaction in the tiredness. It was an exhaustion that spoke of effort and hard work, of pushing boundaries and not giving up. But still, she needed a break. She shot Jax a weary smile before she walked to a nearby bench, grabbing a towel to wipe off the sweat that was trickling down her forehead. As she regained her breath, the truth that had been nibbling at the back of her mind reappeared. The truth about Cami. A few days back Ginny found out about the problems Cami was having with her boyfriend, fights that were more frequent and public. It was a coincidence that she couldn't brush off easily. She had even approached Matteo about it but he seemed dismissive, crediting the boyfriend's reaction to intimidation due to Cami's new hobby - dancing at the same dance school where Ginny had been taking classes, but had never once been seen there. She turned to Jax, her eyes meeting his. "There's something I need to talk to you about," she began, her voice quiet. She told him everything, about her suspicions. The words flowed out of her like a dam had been breached, relief flooding her.
      A heart's a heavy burden.

    • "Don't push your luck, sweetheart", he said amused. "But by all means, be my guest."
      If she wanted to use him as punshing bag instead, he was willing to let Ginny take out her frustration and anger on him. He could take ist with ease. Jax didn't make a show out of it as he stalked over to a small bench against the wall to retrieve the abandoned bandages while Ginny tried her luck with the punching bag. With skilled movements he wrapped the thin cloth around his knuckels and looked over to Ginny through his jet black bangs. With calbulated and slow steps he approached the pale girl and raised his hands, not in tight fists but palms up. A narrow smile, barely visible, lingered on his lips. He couldn't tell, why the determination and pride in these hazel eyes filled him with a long lost feeling of careful joy. Maybe it was the simple fact that his somehow poor distraction worked and her thoughts no longer spiraled around the hauting shadows of her past. Whatever it was, that haunted her.
      Jax was in his element. The familiar sorrounding and the fact that Miller had no control over him within these concrete walls seemed to brightened his grim mood. He felt at home here and save enough to show a more softer side - a tiny fractured piece at least.
      "Time to show me your claws, kitty", Jax taunted her.

      Jax showed no mercy to the petite girl in front of him.
      Over and over he urged Ginny to lay all her force into the punches while he barley moved a muscle. He didn't even break a sweat as her breathing became more frantic and her movements weaker. Some people would have said he was asking too much of an untrained girl but he knew how satisfying it was to release the pent-up frustration and anger. Sometimes you needed someone to take it out on. He even let her get away with hitting his shoulder and chest a few times. The force behind it was not worth mentioning but it brought a proud smile to her beautiful face. A smile he would kill for. What a strange thought that was...
      He finally gave Ginny the much-needed break and almost regretted it as the started to talk about Cami again. With a heavy sigh he sat down on the bench next to the troubled girl and stretched his bad leg out a bit. He tried not to grimace too much but the pain got worse over the last few days. With a stern expression on his face he listened. Jax didn't look at her.
      "Sounds serious to me.", he sighed. "But would he be able to harm her? The fights, the intimidation... but would that really be worth the risk to kill her?"
      He ran his fingers through his sweaty, dark hair before touching a hand to is bad leg and pressing his fingertips gently into his knee.
      "Is that all you know about him? It's not much and maybe not worth the trouble. I told you to stay out of it.", he said and the first time since he sat down beside her Jax turned his head in her direction. His voice lower than before. "Since you won't give up anyway...Did you hear some intell from the officials? I still wonder what pills she took. Certainly not my stuff."
      “We all change, when you think about it.
      We’re all different people all through our lives.
      And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving,
      so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.”